Negativity and Failure

Even if you are not a winner, appear like one. It is one of the most important traits of your personality to lead a healthy life. It is the reflection of your self-belief. A confident person lives far better life than a person with low self- confidence. Well, there are simple things that help in acquiring this particular trait. One is your lifestyle. Most of the times, your physical appearance reflects your self-confidence. Now, do not confuse between your looks and appearance. Your looks are not under your control, but you can always monitor the way you appear. Your presence creates your aura, which always has to be compelling to look self-confident. Always keep in mind that an early bird catches the most worms. A fit person appears more confident than others. Therefore, your appearance makes a lot of impact on the people you meet. Moreover, a smile can do wonders. A smile welcomes a smile. A happy person invites others to converse with him/her. Make eye contact and maintain your body posture while talking. You can practice it in front of the mirror. Rest assured, it helps. Moreover, you must know what to speak. Never try to impress others with false statements. At the same time, never try to impose your ideas on others. There is a thin line between confidence and arrogance.   Be confident in thinking and attitude. Talk to random person whenever you get a chance. Be generous and kind but don’t over apologize. Don’t worry, nobody is perfect, so tie your laces and take on the world.          

According to Collins dictionary, Nature is all the animals, plants, and other things in the world that are not made by people, and all the events and processes that are not caused by people. (I'll be denoting Nature by They, Them, Their... Just cannot confine nature into a box of It.) Let’s meet Nature Nature is super-expressive! Since ages, they are trying hard to express: Pain during ruthless slaughtering, Misery in feeding pollutants, Suffering after a sudden human attack, Yes that’s what nature had to share. Because that’s what we... the most intelligent creatures on this planet... had been offering to them... in our own filthy ways. Cruel We ... who didn’t bother listening to nature shouts in pain inflicted by us. We could not sense those tears; We had no feelings for them in our consciousness. We murdered them for our luxuries; burnt them for money. We went unconscious of their existence, unaware that our existence is superficial without the creator — Nature! You might wonder: Why am I told this? Why am I forced to realize all of it? Well the whole purpose of saying this is: If that’s the ugly past you want to forget, guess what... you got this opportunity! It’s time you can break that equation, and start afresh chemistry with nature. Because nature just forgot ages of brutality by us during this pandemic. Nature revived without long-due revenge! Nature resurrected! Nature is back to the old school smiles! So time to get back to the present and embrace this undeserved opportunity. It’s important we connect with nature now... when they are all smiles! Never was a better time we could feel free from this guilt... the guilt of causing so much harm to them. It’s time we feel happy with them, for them! Just to remind you, nature was never helpless. If they would take long-due revenge, the entire human race could be sacrificed. That’s how much damage we did to them. But guess what... nothing as such happened... And nature we never met... sounds familiar! Call it luck, fate, destiny, anything, but make sure you accept this as a blessing! That human lockdown led to nature's independence! Indirectly adding more generations to the human race. All mediums of pollution are at rest. And the: fresh air, clear skies, whirling trees, gushing winds, chirping birds, they are all back. It’s a huge offering from nature who was hit brutally hard by us. So come on mate… We always complained about limited time. We were unconscious of their cries then. But about now...during this lockdown... Let us not miss this... to listen to nature expressing joy! Well if you are wondering... How do I interact with nature? Let me remind you there’s an unconscious breath transaction always on between you are the greens outside. Oxygen... Carbon dioxide... Oxygen... Carbon dioxide... lifetime transaction... till your last breath! And now let me ask you: The fact that life is lifeless without breath, and breath connects humans to nature, Is this not enough to create an involvement? I feel... Acknowledging this simple fact has enough reasons to develop a beautiful bond with the creator — Nature! If you could feel this mind shift, you could experience life over mental and emotional barriers. Your ego goes for a toss, as you...

The past is gone; The future is unpredictable. What you have and what you can control right now is your present. It is imperative to feel it to enjoy it. As they say, time and tide wait for none; likewise, you should appreciate the present moment rather than making a hue and cry of your past or worrying about the future. On the contrary, what you do is either you ponder upon your past, or you are busy making plans for future. As a result, you neglect to feel the essence of the present moment.You need to realize that 'now' is the moment to cherish. These small moments in the present moment can only make your life happy. Awareness in the present moment makes every moment memorable in a way where you don't need memories to cherish later. When you enjoy the present, the future is bound to be good. One foot in the past and one foot in the future is just like keeping your feet in two boats and trying to make a balance to stay safe. This way, you will not only hurt yourself but also will lose the precious moments of now. STOP HERE. Take deep breaths. Enjoy the NOW. Don't run away from it. Don't allow your thinking to take control over your feelings. Things will happen. You are neither early nor late. Respect the 'TIME ZONE.' Just flow with each passing moment.  Relax and enjoy the present moment. Learn the art of Meditation to stimulate your feelings, which will keep you away from overthinking. Life is beautiful. Start cherishing every moment now.  

What is depression? While it is common for everyone to surface negative emotions, there are people who face these emotions intensely for an elongated time. Depression is the extreme of mental illness which triggers from a single negative thought and then takes a severe form. It affects both physical and mental health. Sometimes, there is no apparent reason for depression and this makes it even worse. In most cases, it is hard to identify a depressed person. Let us try to figure out the symptoms of depression... 1. Thinking more and feeling less Feel is essential for happiness... Revive the feel! Unnecessary thinking not only leads to negative thinking but also keeps you away from feeling the distinct emotions. 2. Non-awareness in the present moment You are lost in your past or busy thinking about the future. As a result, you don’t feel the now without realizing that real happiness is nowhere except the now. It is independent of the outside world. If your sense organs are not consciously performing the respective roles assigned, you lose the awareness in the present moment. And deny the real happiness. 3. Inability to say no to others You are concerned about pleasing others even at the cost of displeasing yourself. You agree with others even if your inner-self disagrees with it. 4. Waiting for the right moment to be happy You are not happy now. The definition of your happiness depends on people and place. You crave for happiness outside without realizing that it is inside you. 5. Inability to enjoy solitude You don’t enjoy your alone time and fear the loneliness. You are lonely even in a crowd. Find out: How can you convert the feeling of loneliness into solitude? 6. Not content with the possessions and credentials You expect too much out of you and as a result, keep on demeaning yourself. Instead of feeling proud of your achievements, you keep counting your failures. You keep coming hard on yourself, lose self-respect and self-esteem in the process. 7. Comparison and competition with others   Instead of feeling blessed by comparing yourself with the people less privileged than you, the grass on the other side is always greener to you. You tend to attract negative emotions like jealousy and fear in the process, and eventually, begin to call depression. 8. Too much emphasis on physical appearance and physical health You over-think about your physical appearance and physical health so much that it infuses stress and fear. Gradually, you kill the love for yourself. Again, it is a gateway to depression. 9. Severe and frequent mood swings It is common to encounter mood swings. But when you encounter it frequently and abnormally, there is a lot to ponder upon. It is an eminent sign of depression.  10.The illusion of being judged by others You fear the judgments of people and so your subsequent move is according to people. It never allows you to do whatever you feel. You dwell inside others’ aura. 11. An unfresh tired mind You could not feel the freshness of mind even in the mornings. You feel drowsy and your mind is always fatigued for no reason. 12. Habituation to drinking You don’t feel happy unless you...

A lockdown for bodies, but minds still wandering... And this distance between mind and body — it’s turning the inevitable pain into self-made suffering. But that’s the downside!! Let’s talk about the upside... the positives through this period. Let’s try to experience these happy realizations: 1. Death connecting us to life People are dying everywhere. It provokes fear of death now and then at every heart, no different you and me. But amidst all these did you realize: We literally experienced our biggest fear Death sitting at home? Gracious we are alive!  Is there a bigger blessing? I don’t think so. Let’s celebrate life with a toast to breath as the biggest reason to smile. 2. Higher sensitivity towards poverty and hunger It’s not only about this lockdown when the poor are dying of hunger. Earlier, most of us could only sympathize. We could not take that one step further — to think about doing something for them. Why? Either shortage of time or our own lives in a turmoil. Now as we standstill, there are more volunteers to think about the poor. This lockdown has taken our sympathies to another level. And that’s wonderful! 3. Turning faces towards the real mirror — Self-awareness We are denied worldly experiences ongoing lockdown. But this phase made us dig deep within to feel ourselves.  The deeper we touch, the darker it feels!! But do you know the sunnier part? At least we are facing the real mirror! We are meeting ourselves everyday. We are knowing ourselves more! No matter beautiful or ugly reflects our face in the real mirror of self-awareness, we are experiencing the taste of our company. It is leading to self-acceptance — the foundation of self-love! 4. Inculcating a new interest Earlier we never got this length of me-time. With a lockdown of direct connections with the outside world, the sharpness of the mind has less to dissect. Maybe it’s time for the soul to reach a deeper dimension without self-judgments. Picking up that half-read old book from the shelf, Tuning-in the chords of the broken guitar, Scribbling emotions in our personal diary,  Pursuing the hobby left out of responsibility, Learning different meditation or yoga practices, Let it be anything that pulls our interest! Who knows, we discover an artist within who flares the life-spark rest of our lives. 5. Connection with smiling nature after decades  Neither money is having the last laugh nor the people. It’s nature smiling! We must feel happy for them.  After all this damage, it resurrected! The air turned cleaner; the tress became greener; the water got purer. Guess what? The renewed nature is blessing us with a healthy life! Do we really need anything else? I feel nothing can draw our interest more than getting richer with nature’s wealth. Let’s celebrate nature, preserve the wealth it’s bestowing! 6. Our battle is always in the inside We have been our comparing lives with people, competing against them. Conveniently we have been blaming them for all the wrong happening with us. But about this time, we are not against outside; we are exploring the truth: We have been battling against our illusions. And it is always about the inside! We are meeting our inner critic... the real audience. And it’s an original ball game altogether. No doubt the battle has got tougher but...

No, you are not. You are just going through a rough phase in your life. Maybe, you are overthinking in matters which do not require much of your attention. It also might be the case that you are going through the process of self-realization and self-actualization. Remember, nothing hits you harder than the process of self-realization and self-actualization. Do not try to overdo things. Do not expect too much out of you. Things will happen. Let it take its time. Everyone has their good and bad times. You need to respect the time zone. Try to indulge in any productive work. It will keep you away from thinking. Remember, most of the times, overthinking because of idleness is the cause of negativity. It is equally important not to fear the unknown. Welcome it. Don't fight with it; Face it. Apprehensions are also the cause of worry. Always remember that most of the time, the problem is not the Fear, but 'The Fear of Fear.' It is also imperative to take pride in whatever you do. Try to do whatever you feel. Moreover, it is equally important to feel whatever you do. Feelings are the essence of staying happy, which are evoked and revived by mediation. Meditation keeps you away from apprehensions and negative thinking. Moreover, always express whatever you feel. Speak out then and there to flush out negativity. Retaining negative emotions inside you is a definite cause of negativity, where you start taking everything in a wrong sense.    

This article is going to be an interesting one... To begin with, let me give you an insight into why is it essential to revive the feel... Feel is the essence of happiness. Feelings are the best judge to distinguish between the things you like and which you don’t. Even you must have experienced that time falls short while doing anything you enjoy. It is because of the involvement of feel in your work. On the contrary, the time slowly limps while doing anything you don't enjoy. Again, it is because the sincere feel to perform it is missing. Therefore, you must try to do things you feel to do. When you feel it, you will be able to love it. Subsequently, when you do things which you love, you will be able to enjoy it. When you enjoy it, you give it a chance to turn it into your passion. My dear friend, if you do anything passionately, it infuses a powerful self-belief you. Finally, things start happening in your favor. A  few heartfelt realizations... Your work must make you happy. Summon into minds that if your work is not making you happy, there is a lot to ponder upon. If your work is not energizing you, something is not right. Straight out, if your work is tiring you, IT IS NOT YOUR WORK. Be mindful of the fact that excellence in any field requires the feel to do and perform. Feel releases an active energy to perform a task dedicatedly. You can say that the feel associated with your works is the mantra of success. By now, I am sure you must be realized that why is it important to do whatever you feel. Better said than done, is it so easy? Is life so lenient on us?  Let's find out... The Reverse formula ... We can say that it is the ideal condition we were talking about. Everyone does not get the opportunity to pursue their passion and follow their dreams. Time and Situations are not always perfect where you do things according to your preferences and choices. Not even that, sometimes you are even forced to do things which you don’t feel to do. Factors like upbringing, surrounding social environment, situations of every individual are different and classified. Everyone does not get an opportunity to do whatever they feel. Some compromise for their loved ones and some compromise because they don't have any loved ones. And this is what life is all about...Adjustments. Many people have to adjust and adapt themselves as per time and situation. There are many individuals who have to comply with circumstances to earn bread without any other option available. No wonder, life is unpredictable with twists and turns. We don’t always get an opportunity to set the dancing tune for ourselves. Therefore, it is essential for us to take things positively with the right attitude. And this is when the reverse formula works... When you can't do whatever you feel, start feeling whatever you do... TIME FOR SOME HAPPY REALIZATIONS: Crying over your plight or surrendering to an unfavorable situation is...

Simply, Indecisiveness is the inability to take a decision. An indecisive person is confused whether they should take a left, a right or to stick with the current position. The positive side of it is that we have the liberty and option to chose. In fact, there is no problem in taking some time to choose the right option. However, things get complicated when we spend too much time evaluating the pros and cons associated with making the right decision. Let us try to comprehend the 7 reasons for indecisiveness and the ways to counter it: 1. Prolonged thinking  The foremost reason is thinking too much in the evaluation of the pros n cons attached to the decision-making. It creates a never-ending confusion, which refrains us from taking a decision. Solution- No doubt, it is important to think before making a decision but let us not over-think to create a mental blockage wherein our mind loses the ability to decide.  2. Too many available options  Many a time, the delight to savor several choices turns out to be an upset. The flickering mind creates a chaos inside the mind, which adds to the inability to decide. Solution- We need to understand that we cannot have everything. Let us respect the options available, and chose the one which is our priority.   3. Fear of choosing wrong  At times, the indecisiveness is because we fear that the decision we would take might prove to be wrong. This apprehension keeps us away from inclination towards a choice. When we fear failures, we start recalling our previous decisions which proved wrong. Subsequently, we unnecessarily put extra pressure on ourselves to take the correct decision. Solution- We need to sink into mind that failures are the gateways to success. Let us not allow the past failures to affect our current decision-making process. 4. Thinking 'what people will think' Sometimes, we want to please everyone with our decision. As a result, we start emphasizing too much on the people’s opinion about the options available.  In the process, our ability to take the right decision gets hampered. Solution- There is no harm in listening to everybody, but we also need to realize that people are never short of opinions and suggestions. Let us never authorize anyone to decide on our behalf. And also, let us stop getting affected by what they will think about it.   5. Not listening to the conscious self  More often than not, we don't listen to our inner voice, the voice which is right most of the times. When we don’t trust the answers from within us at the first place, it infuses the dilemmas leading to indecisiveness and eventually resulting in poor decision-making. Solution- Rest assured, most of the times, we have the right answer. We need to patiently wait for the answer which is within us, trust our instincts and go with the flow. This way, we enjoy all the credentials all alone and even if the decision proves to be wrong, at least we do not have people to blame. 6. The desire for the ideal condition  If the decision-making is tough, it means there are...

I am dying at 35 but this is not what is hurting me. What’s painful is that when I look back, I don’t recall 35 memories to cherish!!! The journey has not been worth remembering. I am not saying I was sad throughout my life, but yes, I always struggled to feel happy. Never had I felt what I realize now, which is the difference between real happiness and materialistic happiness.  And the irony is when I have realized it, I cannot be happy. I am dying and practically, I cannot choose happiness. I can only miss happiness. But at least you can... choose it now. You might be curious to know what happened suddenly that my life turned upside down? I am literally into tears to pen it down but I will, just to make you realize that today is my turn, likewise, it can be yours tomorrow. And I don’t want you to die like me, just like that. Well... nothing much to tell because it was all good a week back. Just a slight pain in my stomach which led to a couple to tests. Huh... to find what? The final stage of liver cancer with a piece of news... the news that I have a few months, weeks or maybe days left. Hard to live with the fact that I am dying anytime soon. But wait a minute, is this something new I got to know? Is it really news that I might die soon? Was I not aware of it or rather are ‘we’ not aware that we‘ll die one day? I am sure even you know about this inevitable truth but there is a difference between you knowing and me knowing it... The difference is that I can feel it now but I’m not sure you can!!! Sorry to say this but maybe you die before me, trust me it is possible. I may sound weird so let me back it with a testimony. About a month back, I heard the shocking news that a 40-year-old man from my vicinity has been diagnosed with a final stage brain tumor and he does not have much time left. I know him personally and this news left me shattered. I remember I was saying to my wife that 40 is not an age to die. How could be God so cruel? Ha... never dared to imagine that I am dying before him in my thirties. Now I am sure you got a pinch of my taste! This is how unpredictable life is. I close my eyes at night more in fear whether they would open to see a morning... sometimes I wonder what is a bigger challenge? To die gracefully or to live gracefully? Because suddenly I see my definition of challenges transforming.   I could sense the definition of my success changing, which was once to earn bread, and what is now to earn breaths. I could feel a change in my attitude from ‘let it come’ some time back to ‘let it go’ today. I could sense the perception of my future...

Becoming a father is a boon. Becoming a father of a girl child is a bigger blessing.  most of the fathers know what their daughter means to them. However, having accepted this, I’m sorry to admit that I am not sure whether I want to become a father of a daughter... Here I begin... what I feel and why I feel so!!! My wife is expecting a baby. She is on top of the world. I cannot express how overjoyed she is. Everyone in the family is happy. But if you ask about my feelings, it’s a mixed feeling. Just not able to put it down into words. I am excited but at the same time; I am nervous. I am not sure whether I shall be able to justify the responsibilities of a father. One thing which always scares me–responsibilities. I still remember the day she told me she missed her monthlies…. I freaked out; I was shocked. Haha…quite contrary to the response she was expecting. At least I can laugh it off today. Now she is 6 months pregnant and yes, the feeling of a to-be father has completely sunk in. It’s not that I had to accept it and so such a feeling. No, not at all. To be honest, it’s a magical feeling. All the fathers and to-be fathers can know how it feels when your wife makes you feel your child’s kicks inside the womb. Not to forget the feel of topsy-turvy movements, swear on God, apprehensions if any, are flushed out at that time. Everyone in the family is waiting for that time, they call it the D-day. And now, my family along with friends and relatives are asking us, what are you expecting- a boy or a girl? One of the few big things they want to know from you at that time. Well, my answer to them is clear, ‘I don’t care, only my child should be healthy at the time of birth, that’s it.’   Huh...... really? Do I feel this way? Does my mind has the same clarity as my words? Well, I am sorry but I am not sure. ‘I don’t care’ is what I always believed but not today. There are a lot of uncertainties and unanswered questions today. Don’t worry about my wife’s choice because they will not judge her choice. But somehow I think if a to-be father wants a son and not a daughter, he is judged and questioned. And the same is happening to me. I fear that everyone, including my family, will judge my decision.  But now, it’s high-time I need to tell the reasons behind my answer. Moreover, I want to answer on behalf of many who think alike but prefer to stay silent. First of all, I am not a male chauvinist. I am not that dirty narrow-minded pig who supports gender inequality. No, I am not looking at a maybe-son as my successor and to tell the truth, I am strictly against the dowry system. Rest assured, I am not killing my maybe-daughter inside the womb either. I respect...