Negativity and Failure

You might face many situations in life where you know that you did well. Also, for that, you seek appreciation from others. You might deserve it, but sometimes you don't get it. It is quite disheartening. Friends, you need to comprehend that it is a cruel world out there. The sooner you realize it, the better it will be for you. Everyone is primarily concerned about themselves. All are busy exploring their ways to healthy and happy living. Nobody is interested in knowing your credentials and achievements. Whatmore, you are also one of them. Moreover, there is no harm in it because life is equally tough for everyone. Therefore, instead of criticizing them, start motivating yourself.  It’s a much-deserved reward after a long, tiring day to remind you that you did great today. It not only uplifts your mood but also enables you to push your limits. It creates a belief of satisfaction and self-confidence. A self -motivated person never looks outside for happiness, as the happiness resides inside them. It is vital to applaud for own-self because you only know how much effort has been put to make things possible. Self-motivation decorates your spirit with strength and self -empowerment. It uplifts you to do things with more vigor and confidence.  It helps you enjoy the success. It also helps you to accept failures, which pushes you to convert that failure into success. Therefore, always treat yourself when you do something good. Keep yourself boosted and motivated. Always keep the spirits high.    

Some of us are busy equating happiness to the past instances while many are awaiting the happiness in the future. Only a few of us are able to realize that happiness is right here, right now in the present moment. If you don't belong to this minority category, this article is a must-read for you. In-depth Realizations... The past is gone, and the future is yet to come. You know it too. But there is a reason why I am stating the obvious. I say so to make you realize that the past cannot be changed, likewise, the future cannot be controlled. You can only take care of the things happening NOW. It is only the present moment which always stays with you. Anyone and everyone might leave you except the present moment, which will always be with you until your last breath. If you agree to it, then allow yourself to enjoy its company and make it your best friend...How? Let us find out: The essence to feel: To enjoy the present moment, the first thing you need to know is that Feel is the essence of  Happiness. So the first thing you need to do is to revive the feel.  But it is not that easy as it sounds. It is because your thoughts are dominant over your ability to feel the present moment. You need to realize that Feel is inversely proportional to Thoughts. If you are thinking more, it means you are feeling less. And if you are doing so, the upcoming part of the article is not something you can afford to miss:  Look, I am not saying that thinking is not important. Of course, it's important. Unless you think, you will not be able to plan. Planning is important to get ready to face the upcoming situations. Also, your professional atmosphere requires thinking. So yes, positive and productive thinking is important. But you need to understand that it is not thinking but negative thinking, which needs to be avoided. To avoid negative thinking, I just want you to feel more and think less. The process of negative thinking... What is the current scenario? When you are always thinking, you are not realizing that simultaneously, you are less responsive to your sense organs. Let us explore how thinking is taking a toll on your sense organs. Eyes- You are not able to view the beauty of the nature surrounding you. Nose- You are unable to feel your blessed breaths, which itself is a form of meditation. Ears- You are unable to listen to the beautiful melodies...sounds of nature, delicate words by your loved ones, and most importantly, you are not listening to your inner voice. Tongue- You are not able to feel the food bites...You are more concerned thinking about what you are eating than to feel the fact that you are eating. Skin- You are unable to sense the gentle winds which want to nourish you, the beautiful touch of your loved ones, and many such things.  Do you know, just by sensing any of the sense organs completely, the feelings you experience can be as...

"Whatever goes around comes around." Yes, it is the bottom-line of Karma. Karma is our action or deed; no matter how small or big. Whatever we do, has an objective behind it. Karma also deals with that objective. If we do something good to others but it has an evil intention behind it, then according to karma, it is wrong. Likewise, if we make a mistake but the objective behind it is pure and pious, then karma treats you accordingly. Let us take an example. If we steal a coin and give it to a beggar who is in need, the motive behind it is compassion. Here, the act of helping overpowers the act of stealing. Therefore, whatever we do, it should have a noble intention behind it. It is what "Karma" teaches us.    

Do you only feel negative during this lockdown? With pain and helplessness all around, With your self-identity forced to switch roles, With a jolted normal for unpredictably long, The thought pop ups cannot be exciting. Infact most of them are negative... Relax... that's human! And it's not only your story. This is the first time we fall on the same page.  But maybe... this lockdown... most of us went all too far. Let's Address the Problem Fear... Dilemmas... Uncertainties... Anxiety... You are thinking too much about the future.  Overflowing thoughts drive you everywhere you don't want to reach. Now that lays the foundation of a quandary. Because when this unconscious flow of thoughts continues, it leads to mental diarrhea, which soon attacks your emotions.  Ahh... now that hurts! With thoughts already conflicting, this lockdown came up with another challenge... Managing emotions... a bigger task than managing mind. Do you know what's the result of mismanaged thoughts and emotions? Your crude feelings turn negative!! Once your feelings turn negative, no matter how hard you try, you cannot feel happy.  And that's what is happening to most of us.... sitting at homes... having nothing to do.  Bodies are locked down, but minds still wandering. Painful state this... densely negative!  The good news: We can get out of here. Let's talk about the revival now! How to Revive From State Where Feelings Turned Negative? Arrange a session You with Yourself where you are disconnected from the outside world.  No people, no cell phones, no distraction whatsoever... Start with a minimum of 30 min session whenever you get Time. Time... not a difficult thing to find during this lockdown... isn’t it? I agree some of my friends would get offended about that. And that's because there are many samaritans who volunteered to step out of their houses to serve people and nation in anyways. And there are also individuals who could not afford Me time as they were, and still are busy with their household chores. But I must say, sacrifice that 30 min of sleep even if you have to, but during this lockdown, everyone needs that session, that session of self-introspection. So what do you do in that session? Do nothing different! Quitely get back to basics... Remind yourself that everything started with your mind... overflowing with negative thoughts... for an extended period. And that's what touched the depth of feelings. So to revive your positive feelings, you need to get back to your thoughts. Go for it! Just sit comfortably, preferably with closed eyes, and observe your thoughts coming and leaving. Don't pay attention to any. Allow them to pass by. Stop participating.... stop involving with any thought... even the ones you call positive.              We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. — Buddha Why do you stop paying attention to positive thoughts? You might be wondering: No attention to negative thoughts... sounds logical! But why should I stop paying attention to positive thoughts? Because that's a ploy. That's deliberate from the mind to convince you to interact with thoughts. So that you hook to it... and finally get carried away by the flow of it. It's a mind's...

Most of you are familiar with the proverb “A jack of all cards but master of none.” But do you know it's in-depth meaning? Let us sink in deep into its connotation to connect with this article intensely. Customarily, this proverb is used to signify people who have some knowledge in many fields but do not have expertise in a specific domain. More often than not, people use this proverb sarcastically. It is more of a taunt to tell you that you are good for nothing. Yes, this proverb is used by others to demean you intentionally. It is quite a negative connotation of this proverb and in this post, we shall try to explore the positive side of it... My personal realizations: There was a time when I used to get extremely demotivated by this proverb. I was going through a rough patch in my life. I was facing some serious difficulties in discovering my domain of passion. It was the phase when people used to shoot this proverb at me the most. These people were no one but my so-called loved ones. My ears got tired of listening to it. They used to tell it casually, never realized the intensity I got affected by it. You know why I used to get hurt so badly? It is because somewhere I knew they were not wrong by saying so. It felt like someone is rubbing salt in my open wounds, and I am bound to bear it. I could sense this proverb pointing fingers at me and saying “ You are a loser.”  I started feeling depressed. It is because there wasn’t any field in which I could feel that I am the best. One morning I sensed that overthinking has started taking a toll on my mental health. I realized that before it entirely ruins my mental health, I need to alter my outlook towards life. I started to meditate, which was not easy initially. I kept on practicing it daily. Gradually, I started enjoying it. I sensed my way of thinking change and began to feel optimistic. One day when I was meditating, I fathomed a realization. It made me feel positive, energetic and excited. It was nothing but the positive connotation of the proverb “A jack of all cards and master of none,” which shouted: “A jack of all cards can compete with four kings.” The connotation of  "A jack of all cards can compete with four kings" Even if you have little knowledge in every field, it implies you have all the choices available to explore the domain which pulls your interest the most. Of course, you would find many people better than you in every field. But if you are a jack of all cards, surprisingly, it means all the choices are available to you. It can turn out to be a blessing in disguise for you. You don't need to do anything special. You just need to have a positive mindset. You just have to explore your inside and target the right field, which you have been neglecting till...

"I found that with depression, one of the most important things you could realise is that you're not alone." ~Dwayne Johnson Did you ever bow down to your mind demons? I have... but that experience taught me the best lifetime-lesson. My life was not a fairytale. But fortunately, my fight was never for bread and butter.  I had every means to suffice my materialistic desires. I had beautiful people around in the form of friends and family. But the ironical truth is I was alarmingly sad with no one knowing it. I had droll people around to laugh with but no one to share my gloomy secrets. My outer world was full of light but my inner world was pitch dark. Unable to recognize the cause, I couldn’t express. A brute force struck my head hard now and then. The occasional was turning into chronic breathlessness. I was deserted in the crowd continuously losing my feelings. Life was asking some tough answers, but my restless mind could answer none. Not that I didn’t think of doc-visit. But which doctor — was always in question as I was unable to classify the category under which my problem falls. The idea to share with someone would soon raise questions — Which person? What would I explain? There were many apprehensive dilemmas consuming my head elevating my problem's intensity. I ignored them all for some time but each elapsing moment was not curbing but exasperating my disorientation. Did I seem so normal to my loved ones or they dumb? Am I over-expecting? Have I become a useless attention seeker? Yes... all of this was bruising my mind — the bruises no one saw. Yes... I finally consulted a psychiatrist. It felt like a hapless victim when the doc diagnosed me with persistent depressive disorder — a  type of depression. Mental health awareness — far away from the educated... My suffering could have been diagnosed earlier and averted. But for the lack of mental health awareness in many including me, what I only knew was a mentally ill person is mad. Discussing mental health problems is still a social stigma in most parts of the planet. Moreover, ignorant people use the word depression so often that the ones who are suffering from it cannot address it. It lays the foundation for a quandary for the one facing it. People are unable to open up about their mental wounds.  Even if they try to express, their words are trespassers to people’s ears. As a result, mind demons never allow the covered wounds to heal. Even the anti-depressants couldn’t revive my feelings... The prescribed pills were more of sedatives and the only positive I could extract — there were no more sleepless nights. But again, I dozed off irregularly for an unusually long period, sometimes twelve hours at a stretch.  It was all bleak with no sense of recovery. And in case you don’t know: Happiness is a feeling. So literally I was losing the feeling of happiness. I was reduced to mere existence. Whenever I  knocked on the sweet-memory door, it never opened. My condition worsened! A boon in...

When people don't fulfill your expectations, you get hurt. Your undue expectation from people has become one big reason to feel negative.  Therefore, it is imperative to find out why these expectations and from whom are these expectations? Why do you expect and from whom do you expect? In today’s world, you expect from people because you want them to ‘Return the favor back.’ It is an obligation you anticipate from others in exchange for the good things you assume you did for them. It is the reason why you expect a reciprocation. Quickly, you need to understand that if you are counting on every acquaintance to fulfill your expectations, the matter of fact is that you are unreasonable and foolish. Supremely, your expectations could be from the ones whom you love, who are important to you. It might be from the people you care for, whom you respect, the ones with whom you share a strong bond and an active connection. Let's say, people are fulfilling every expectation of yours. But, what we need to comprehend is that everything is perfectly fine until people keep responding as per your expectations. The question is how long you will keep on getting your expectations fulfilled by others? How long will others carry the burden of meeting your expectations? The never-ending expectation process: Be mindful of the fact that the fulfillment of one expectation leads to the urge of the other. Gradually, it leads to an endless flow and to tell the truth, the chain breaks down one day. Yes, your feelings get hurt one day. Sometimes, the volume of that pain soars high to an extent where you tend to shift your perception of people who belong to you. By and by, you even form a negative opinion about those people. You begin to judge those people based on that particular situation in which they did not raise up to your expectation. You start to forget the positives associated with them. In due process, you don’t realize the value of that person in your spirits before this particular incident. And eventually, you lose that person.  Let me bombard a few questions on you... If you are demanding the ideal condition out of a person, are you an ideal person to demand it? How will you feel when you are on the other side of the table? Are you not wrong on your part if you are expecting people to respond according to you? Are you not judging people calling them wrong without knowing about their problems and situations? Maybe, they could have been in their world of problems when you were expecting from them. Or maybe they are the ones dwelling in their own aura and you are not able to perceive it. Sorry for being brutally honest but when you start putting conditions on expectations from others, you are wrong. Put it to yourself and ask yourself how do you feel about those people who impose their expectations on you? And when you are not able to meet their expectations, how do you feel about those judgemental...

We might be one of those who confuse between Self respect the virtue and Ego the vice.The reason is simple:Both infuse a sense of pride. What I feel is ego and self respect are the two extremes of a single line. Unlocking the mystery is vital. Before moving to the differences, let us address the two — Ego and Self Respect. Definitions of Ego and Self Respect Ego is negative. It is an emerging belief arising from deliberate comparison of oneself with others.We compare ourselves with both the higher and lower people we consider in terms of money, power, authority, appearance, anything. Either we feel superior or we get hurt. Self respect is positive. There is a deeper consciousness where we commit only to actions that don't cause shame while doing it or afterward. A heightened state when there's self-acceptance regardless of possessions and identities.  I love this citation: “There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. ‘Good pride’ represents our dignity and self-respect. ‘Bad pride’ is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.” —John C. Maxwell It wonderfully defines the two often confused Ego and Self Respect.Let us jump right into the differences: 15 differences between Ego and Self respect Ego- We bow down to the ones we consider superior to us, and bully/ignore the ones inferior in our adulterated minds.Self Respect- There's a positive attitude where we love everyone including ourselves.Ego- Me only me... there's only self-interest even at the cost of hurting others. What's worse, we are unconscious of it most times.Self Respect- We, we, or after you... We take care of everyone's sentiments, never hurting anyone intentionally. Same time making sure our voice is heard.Ego- We are in constant comparison and competition with others. We desire to beat them anyhow.Self Respect- We don't compare ourselves to others. We aspire to touch our deeper selves.Ego- We deliberately choose the wrong means, opt for shortcuts, be manipulative just to satisfy our ego.Self Respect- Our respect for ourselves is supreme which refrains from committing to the wrong. It encourages to choose difficult paths, the tough responses.Ego- We fear the outside world — people and situations. The reason is simple: Self-conceit is hollow, so we fear any change from the monotony could expose our nudity as naked.Self Respect- We fear no one as there's nothing to hide. We welcome the new through a positive attitude and self-belief. Ego- It dwells on materialistic achievements and alluring drives. We buy an expensive mobile or a new car, it fuels our ego. We feel superior to others. But when we lose money or power, our ego is shattered. There's always dependency for happiness.Self Respect- It is an inner virtue not fuelled by materialism. It is a guiding light from our deeper self independent of the outside world.Ego- It fulfills with negative emotions deriving out of self-pride. These negative emotions are hatred, jealousy, anger, greed, impatience, and the like. We don't hesitate to harm and misuse others.Self Respect - When we ride high on self-respect, we love ourselves and respect...

How many times are you told by elders, friends and mentors to develop a positive attitude? Everyone instructs to do it, but only a few have directions on how to do it? What’s your attitude An attitude is a mindset developed over time, through experiences of resilience and observations about people and things.  It’s a predisposition to respond in a certain way, to both the known and unknown.  Simply, your attitude is your perspective towards life proceedings. It speaks a lot about you. Expressions ( often called as body language) is the indicator of your attitude towards people.  That doesn’t mean you should start dancing to them. Allow the real inside to roll your reel outside. And that’s why we need a positive attitude, to respond better in the now, so we unlock our desires, and dive into the flow of achieving them.  What's Positive Attitude? Positive attitude is Integrity —  honesty towards people and commitment to oneself.  The headspace where you are optimistic yet surrender to the present beyond control. It unleashes vibes of nothing to lose and experiences to gain, the approach that sets the spirit free to express your true self and unlock higher possibilities. Positive attitude is luxury you afford piercing comfort. It fosters with practice. Positive attitude is a mind zone where: people's thinking of you doesn't matter to you.  you trust instincts more than your compulsive thoughts. you believe everything will be ok no matter how hard it is right now. good for you includes good for people. there is self respect, no ego. success is just moving. lesson is the name of a failure. you believe no feeling is permanent, neither success nor failure, neither happiness nor sadness. beginning means almost done. you embrace negativity and bliss out to positivity. mind welcomes fear and accepts shortfalls gracefully. you are perseverant until you reach your goal. The headspace where your flowing presence entices everyone in the room is a positive attitude. Top Quotes on Attitude that Inspire “If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.” ― Frances Hodgson Burnett “Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you.” ― Walt Whitman “I do not believe in taking the right decision, I take a decision and make it right.” ― Muhammad Ali Jinnah “If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining - this is what you chose.” ― Joe Konrath “The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.” — Oprah Winfrey “The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.” — Louis E. Boone “An attitude of positive expectation is the mark of the superior personality.”  — Brian Tracy “When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” — Helen Keller 15 mindsets to develop a positive attitude Boils to Discipline when you Lack Motivation in Work Show up to work no matter how low you feel. Just showing up is half the job done. Begin your session with a 15 min exercise where you...

My dear friend, starting from head-tail, good-evil, right-wrong, everything is double-faced. Even a story or a debate has two angles. And you know what, we, the humans are no different. The fact which we all need to get acquainted with is that we have two bulls inside us fighting with each other. Let’s find out who wins? Naturally, our physical body needs food. It is the food we eat which keeps us up and running. Without a second thought, food is the fuel for the physical body. But one thing to observe is the food we eat, the diet we follow is our choice… healthy or unhealthy? And there is a difference in how we feel following either of the diets. While healthy food makes us feel fresh and energy-boosted, the unhealthy food lowers our energy and freshness level. No brainer, you know these things, but there is a reason I am saying this... My dear friend, much like our physical body, which runs on what we eat, our mental body runs on what we feed. I’ll come straight to the point, there are two bulls inside our mind. These bulls feed on two different feeds. Interestingly, only one feed is available at a point. As a result, one bull is always hungry, and the other bull is always full. And so, the fight is always on between the two to get their respective feed. Who are these bulls? Why do they fight? What is their food? Why can’t we feed them together? What is the source of their food? These might be some of your questions seeking answers.  Yes, now the time has come to meet both the bulls... Let us meet the first bull: This bull is always happy, positive, compassionate, cheerful, stress-free, high on inner-self attributes, and hence high on life. I call it the Saint’s bull, which is always hungry for positive emotions. It feeds on joy, gratitude, pride, love which it attracts from the outside world. We can say it is the healthy food which the saint’s bull craves for!!! Let us meet the second bull: This bull inside us is always sad, angry, frustrated, low in inner-self attributes, and hence is depressed all the time. I call it a Demon’s bull, which is always hungry for negative emotions. This bull feeds on hatred, stress, jealousy which it attracts from the outside world. We can conclude that it is the unhealthy food which the demon’s bull craves for!!! Now, when we have met both the bulls, let’s talk about the availability of feed for the bulls.  Situations providing food to the Saint’s bull: The arrival of a newborn Monetary gains and profits Job promotion Success in any competitive field Accomplishment of goals A celebration party These are some situations from our personal and professional sphere in which the saint’s bull gets the feed from the outside world. This is why we feel happy and joyous in these situations. Let us find out the instances which provide food to the demon’s bull: Loss of life of a loved one Monetary Losses Failure in a competition Embarrassments and Criticisms In these situations, the only feed available from...