Negativity and Failure

Contentment is the realization of a beautiful soul. It is a feeling which resides within every individual, but only a few are able to explore it. It's completely different from materialistic happiness dependent on the outside world. Counting your blessings is the best way to reach there! A hungry person when smells the aroma of food, it is contentment. A mother while feeding her child sees a smile on his/her face, it is contentment. Father, when he sees his daughter in her wedding dress, is contentment. Contentment is not a thought. It's an unmatched feeling that awakens the lively buds of your soul. You cannot buy contentment; you earn it! When you see a flower, it's beauty and scent fills your heart with positivity. At times, you want to become that flower by aromatizing the life of others and spreading happiness. When one small act of yours brings a smile to someone’s face or a tear of joy in those eyes, that compassion within you is nothing but contentment. Even in your work sphere, the feeling derived from doing work that makes you happy is contentment. Sometimes you succeed, sometimes you fail. When you succeed, you feel a sense of joy, it is contentment. Even when you fail, a proud feeling must arise that you fulfilled the demand of that particular situation by giving your best. That feeling is nothing but contentment. However, you have to make sure that blissfulness derived out of contentment should never lead to complacency. It must always make you stress-free rather than making you carefree. It must push you further than to pull you back. Remember, standing water gets dirty quickly. So, never stop and keep flowing.             

Straight out, it is your way of looking at things and people. Negativity is only the one side of the coin. Yes, there could be many things happening around you that you don’t like. In fact, there are two set of things leading to negativity... Things happening around you, which can be seen by everyone... Every another day, you read the newspapers or scroll down on facebook to find out about the brutal crimes, the freaking accidents, the untimely demises, the deadly diseases, the uprooting poverty and many such incidents to affect you adversely for quite some time. Things happening inside you, which can only be seen by you... It is good to be self-aware but yes, you may not always look beautiful when you see yourself in the mirror. And when you don't do something about the same, it infuses elements fuelling negativity. Those elements are jealousy, comparison with others, pervert thoughts, materialistic addiction, self-harming thoughts and so on. Interestingly, there is a sub-category in this aspect. And this category is negativity because of expectations. Always remember that expectations from people and of people, both infuses negativity. It is because sometimes the expectations are fulfilled and sometimes not. And when the expectations fail because of betrayals, broken trusts or failures, it's by-product feeling induces negativity. If are not a victim of it yet, keep sailing the way you are. And if you have gone through it, not a problem either. The only thing is that you learned it the hard way. The good thing about these things happening to you is that it teaches you the best of life lessons, if you are ready to perceive it that way. The worst part... When you cannot stop and change the wrong happenings, it leads to negativity. See, there are different kinds of people living on this planet. All are different and somewhere that is the cause of stability as well. If you ask me how to get rid of it... You cannot change the course of nature. Everything is not under your control. But yes, you are fully in control of the things happening around you and inside you. And if something is happening wrong, be aware of it and take the responsibility of changing it. Nonetheless, what you can do is see the other side of the coin; THE POSITIVE SIDE. There could also be people who love you. There could be many things and situations which are favorable to you. There could be your credentials and achievements, which might give you a sense of pride and self-motivation. Friends, why are you not able to feel and realize it? The reason could be you are too busy sniffing the negativity than to count your blessings. What else you can do is start expressing your negativity in any form, be it by speaking out, writing, exercising, be it any form as you look. But never retain it inside. You know, expressing negativity in any form is also your deliberate attempt to convert your negativity into positivity. Time for some Practical Realizations...  Look, the ideal conditions are not...

Do you only feel negative emotions?Are these customary?Sadness of missing someone;Dejection by a betrayal;Heart-broken after criticism;Fear anticipating failures;Anger out of low self-love; I’m sure you taste many such experiences offering you the taste of different negative emotions.And yes... any of these emotions are powerful enough to make anyone feel negative. I am sure it’s a bad taste when you feel negative.No denial sometimes it’s a walkthrough hell. But before you criticize any of the negative emotions, please knock your memory door and ask yourself:Did that experience..where you felt the negative emotions... taught you a life lesson?Somewhere deep down inside...you’ll accept it has... in fact a profound one. So now tell me:How can feeling negative emotions be bad when they teach you beautiful life lessons?In fact, feeling negative is vital to realize the essence of positivity. Sounds silly, it’s not:Allow me to share how feeling negative emotions opened the floodgates of positivity in my life: There was a phase when I was completely down under. Depression had hit me so hard I was under the influence of anti-depressants.And it was just a matter of time even those pills stopped soothing. My moment of hitting the rock bottom was when I felt I have lost myself forever. No doubt that moment was shit scary than anything else I ever experienced. But there's also something good to share about the moment...As I had nothing more to lose, I set myself free!I was feeling free, a lot relieved.I had lost all my ego... and I always felt happy while grounded!This was the time I started different forms of meditating... and met my all-time favorites... Mindful Meditation. Practicing mindful meditation taught me an art...To become an observer of my thought than to participate in it. It is then when I realized:Negative emotions are best of friends. Just a call away from any of each other; they are never lonely.  Ironically, when they are together; I feel deserted! The emotion hosting other negative emotions in my mind was jealousy. I was jealous of: smiles reflecting happiness on most faces. (I could not afford one) calmness by which many people perceived losses. (It amazed me many times) fearlessness in the eyes of a few people while facing unfavorable situations. (I tried but never succeeded) tirelessness and freshness some people carried throughout the day. (It seemed impossible) conscious minds extracting their fullest potential. (I could only dream of it) souls reflecting contentment and fulfilment. (I never felt blessed) I was possessed by negativity... must confess that was my darkest phase!My feelings were only responding to negative emotions; calls of each positive emotion got unheard. It was that time when I wrote: Suicide must not be a proof of depression.Yes that's how deep I was sunk. Wondering what led to my life transformation?Continuing meditating... continuing exploring slums of mind.It took me a while to perceive an obvious observation I was neglecting. I observed:I was not the only imperfect! I am not alone who feels negativity! I understood each individual has a shortcoming.The person joyful with family could be rude to his employees. The ones who extracts the fullest mind potential may not...

Am I right or am I wrong? This question comes to your mind before and after any action. Let us try to find an answer. Dear friend, you have your right-wrong beliefs in different spheres- personal, professional, political, economic and so on. But a person’s life mainly revolves around two spheres-personal and professional. Involving these two spheres, let us take the help of illustrations to unlock the right and wrong beliefs. You can have the right and wrong beliefs about: Situations People Let us take a situation-based instance from the personal sphere... If I ask you... Is God right or wrong? This question sounds weird, but trust me it’s logical. Please answer it… Did you feel that your answer is biased to your current situation? Confused? Let me clear this out for you.  Suppose, your today is a fairytale with happiness all around. No wonder, for you, God is absolutely right! God forbid but assume the other side… You surfaced a sudden loss or a failure. Something shattered your life and there’s sadness all around. If I ask you the same question, God will be wrong. Yes, it happens with almost every individual. Your answer today is dependent on your current situation. You felt it, right? And this happens with most of us. The spontaneity to react to a situation bypasses the concepts of right and wrong.  Let us take the example of people in your professional sphere... If I ask you whether your boss is right or wrong? Your answer will be based on the current tuning with him. The day when he applauds you or offers you incentives or talks about your salary raise, he is right. But the day when he screams at you or overburdens you with work, the same boss is wrong.  The same thinking is applicable when you are the boss...The day you see your employee devoting extra time to work, cracking a deal, achieving targets, he is right... and when he takes long leaves, asks for a salary hike, commits mistakes, he is wrong. One observation drawn is you adjust your right and wrong as per time and situation you are in... Let us find out whether this adjustment is justified… Here’s the interesting part... You are just another person who makes a choice as per your convenience of time and situation. Likewise, others are doing it. And there is nothing wrong with it. My dear friend, you are just a slave to our priorities. Your right and wrong are molded as per time and situation you in. It is all about your priorities and you need not feel sorry for the same. It is the practicality of the real world. And there is nothing much you can change about it. So let us stop judging people and situations, and stop labeling them as right or wrong... An eye opener... When your life is loaded with materialistic options, you might feel that thinking always about the money is wrong. But God forbid, when you cannot fulfill your necessities of life, all you want is money. Now tell me whether you are right or wrong? Will you judge yourself now? I am sure you’ll not… Time for in-depth realizations!!! You...

Failure or Success- A perspective… When a coin is tossed, there's a 50% chance it will land upon the side you bet. Similar is our outcome in different chores we perform in our life. One major difference that differentiates our life with tossing of the coin is that we put in a lot of devotion and hard work in our efforts.  "Success is not final; failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts." ~Winston Churchill But similar to the tossing of a coin, those chores may result in either success or failure. Sometimes even after extreme hard work and perseverance, the outcome is a failure, leaving us shattered. What happens when failure is the outcome?  Failure is the outcome of mere bad luck or a minor fault which we don't realize while enduring. We regret about failures when all our efforts go in vain and nothing fruitful comes out.  We get disheartened, thinking we will never succeed and then delve into the domain of negative thoughts. Students failing in competitive exams, people facing rejections while seeking employment; Life has become a battlefield where success is adjourned as the winner, while failure is looked with pity, remorse, and guilt. This outlook needs tweaking. What to comprehend? Success is a destination, but it is the journey full of failures, that deserves an appreciation. ‘Success is that lively and elusive mask of realization, which covers the various lifeless faces of failures.’ Happy Realization People fail to realize that they would never commit that same mistake again in their lives ever. If they had tasted success in that only attempt then maybe this mistake would have cost them severely.  We need to realize that the failure causing such heart-wrenching grief to their heart, is just due to a minor mistake, a temporary glitch that can be rectified in the next attempt.  We need to realize quickly that we are not failures alone. Everyone, and I repeat, everyone who is successful has failed on numerous occasions to reach where he/she is. we just have to accept those glitches as normal, without overthinking about it. and move on, and move on. Obviously, it ain't easy, the reason we have fewer success stories. People have to take a huge leap of faith to do that. Even though society may blame you, criticize you at an unbearable level, trust me, you can bear them all, provided you compete with none other than oneself. The course of action: Analyze: This is the most crucial tool to avoid failures in the upcoming future. The secret to success lies in your failures. People have to just analyze them carefully and draw the point of errors or flaws, and vouch to never repeat them. Plan: Devise a new plan of approach omitting the mistakes you have analyzed. Use new techniques that you will be able to apply. Avoid sticking to the customary ones which have stopped delivering results. Enact: Apply the whole plan step by step and execute it as per your calculations. Don’t deviate in the greed of achieving more. In pursuit of greed, you may even lose what you aspire, which...

 The world is full of negative energies and negative people around us. There are many instances which we see, hear, read and subsequently feel every day. The unnatural deaths due to deadly diseases, sudden accidents, brutal rapes, fatal crimes; moreover the betrayals, hypocrisy, jealousy and many more…you are bound to feel negative. But, this is one way of feeling it. Let us introduce ourselves to another way of looking at things. Despite all of the negativity happening around us, we also have all the reasons to feel content. We have a shelter to shed, food to eat, water to drink, money to spend. On top of that, WE HAVE TIME TO THINK AND TALK ABOUT NEGATIVE/ POSITIVE while most of the people do not have time to breathe freely. Compare yourself, but with the ones who can only dream of living your life. STOP COMPLAINING. You have all the right reasons to feel positive. Start feeling and enjoying happiness NOW. Last but not the least, follow compassion. Helping others and making others happy is a definite way to feel happy and positive.  

Success and failure are brothers from different mothers. You try hard but the end result is not always in your favor. It is the time when people start judging you and even ask for justifications for your downfall or failure. Straight out, you need to appreciate the fact that your actions were inspired by none other than you. You did what you felt was right. People who can accept and understand it will agree to it. They will always back your decision. On the other hand, those who disagree; your hundreds of justifications will be in vain. Trust me, it is impossible to clarify your actions to everybody. People perceive what they want to as per their convenience and understanding. Moreover, why do you need to give justifications for your committed actions? A decision taken can have both the conditions possible. Either it will be right or it will be wrong. Be brave enough to take the responsibility of any condition. Why are you giving justifications to others and authorizing them to take a call on your decision? Also, the definition of right and wrong vary from person to person. Subsequently, neither it is possible nor it is your responsibility to make everyone happy. You don’t owe any justifications to anyone except to your time. Obliging others with your justifications is a big question on your self-belief and self-importance. Therefore, it is entirely your responsibility to take a stand for your actions. Always be loyal to your time as you cannot predict how much you have. Do things what the time demands and not what the people demand. It is the justification for your time, not people, which eases your life journey.      

Ok, let me second that negative people and things surround you. Simultaneously, don't you feel that an individual or a situation detrimental to you could be positive for others? Moreover, don't you think it is entirely practicable that others find you cynical? Having said that, does that make you negative? No, it does not. One thing you need to realize is every individual perceive people and situations according to him/her. I am sorry but only seeing negativity implies that you are wearing a defective pair of lenses. Please stop playing the blame game. Always remember that you can never get affected by others when you have a dominant and a powerful inner-self.  Straight out, getting carried away by negativity emitted by people and situations is your incompetency to deal with it. Feeling cynical because of others implies that you are not under the influence of your aura. It indicates that you are dwelling on others' aura. Summon into mind that YOU are the only reason for your negativity or positivity. You cannot get affected by others if you have a prestigious and powerful inner self. Moreover, one more thing you need to understand is that you should not stay quiet if you have an opinion. Speak up. Express yourself. Let people know what you feel. Flushing out emotional feelings then and there always makes you feel lighter. Subsequently, it enables you to keep away from negativity. Retaining things inside you gives birth to negativity. Eventually, you start playing the blame game. Stop doing it.  

My dear friend, starting from head-tail, good-evil, right-wrong, everything is double-faced. Even a story or a debate has two angles. And you know what, we, the humans are no different. The fact which we all need to get acquainted with is that we have two bulls inside us fighting with each other. Let’s find out who wins? Naturally, our physical body needs food. It is the food we eat which keeps us up and running. Without a second thought, food is the fuel for the physical body. But one thing to observe is the food we eat, the diet we follow is our choice… healthy or unhealthy? And there is a difference in how we feel following either of the diets. While healthy food makes us feel fresh and energy-boosted, the unhealthy food lowers our energy and freshness level. No brainer, you know these things, but there is a reason I am saying this... My dear friend, much like our physical body, which runs on what we eat, our mental body runs on what we feed. I’ll come straight to the point, there are two bulls inside our mind. These bulls feed on two different feeds. Interestingly, only one feed is available at a point. As a result, one bull is always hungry, and the other bull is always full. And so, the fight is always on between the two to get their respective feed. Who are these bulls? Why do they fight? What is their food? Why can’t we feed them together? What is the source of their food? These might be some of your questions seeking answers.  Yes, now the time has come to meet both the bulls... Let us meet the first bull: This bull is always happy, positive, compassionate, cheerful, stress-free, high on inner-self attributes, and hence high on life. I call it the Saint’s bull, which is always hungry for positive emotions. It feeds on joy, gratitude, pride, love which it attracts from the outside world. We can say it is the healthy food which the saint’s bull craves for!!! Let us meet the second bull: This bull inside us is always sad, angry, frustrated, low in inner-self attributes, and hence is depressed all the time. I call it a Demon’s bull, which is always hungry for negative emotions. This bull feeds on hatred, stress, jealousy which it attracts from the outside world. We can conclude that it is the unhealthy food which the demon’s bull craves for!!! Now, when we have met both the bulls, let’s talk about the availability of feed for the bulls.  Situations providing food to the Saint’s bull: The arrival of a newborn Monetary gains and profits Job promotion Success in any competitive field Accomplishment of goals A celebration party These are some situations from our personal and professional sphere in which the saint’s bull gets the feed from the outside world. This is why we feel happy and joyous in these situations. Let us find out the instances which provide food to the demon’s bull: Loss of life of a loved one Monetary Losses Failure in a competition Embarrassments and Criticisms In these situations, the only feed available from...

Some of us are busy equating happiness to the past instances while many are awaiting the happiness in the future. Only a few of us are able to realize that happiness is right here, right now in the present moment. If you don't belong to this minority category, this article is a must-read for you. In-depth Realizations... The past is gone, and the future is yet to come. You know it too. But there is a reason why I am stating the obvious. I say so to make you realize that the past cannot be changed, likewise, the future cannot be controlled. You can only take care of the things happening NOW. It is only the present moment which always stays with you. Anyone and everyone might leave you except the present moment, which will always be with you until your last breath. If you agree to it, then allow yourself to enjoy its company and make it your best friend...How? Let us find out: The essence to feel: To enjoy the present moment, the first thing you need to know is that Feel is the essence of  Happiness. So the first thing you need to do is to revive the feel.  But it is not that easy as it sounds. It is because your thoughts are dominant over your ability to feel the present moment. You need to realize that Feel is inversely proportional to Thoughts. If you are thinking more, it means you are feeling less. And if you are doing so, the upcoming part of the article is not something you can afford to miss:  Look, I am not saying that thinking is not important. Of course, it's important. Unless you think, you will not be able to plan. Planning is important to get ready to face the upcoming situations. Also, your professional atmosphere requires thinking. So yes, positive and productive thinking is important. But you need to understand that it is not thinking but negative thinking, which needs to be avoided. To avoid negative thinking, I just want you to feel more and think less. The process of negative thinking... What is the current scenario? When you are always thinking, you are not realizing that simultaneously, you are less responsive to your sense organs. Let us explore how thinking is taking a toll on your sense organs. Eyes- You are not able to view the beauty of the nature surrounding you. Nose- You are unable to feel your blessed breaths, which itself is a form of meditation. Ears- You are unable to listen to the beautiful melodies...sounds of nature, delicate words by your loved ones, and most importantly, you are not listening to your inner voice. Tongue- You are not able to feel the food bites...You are more concerned thinking about what you are eating than to feel the fact that you are eating. Skin- You are unable to sense the gentle winds which want to nourish you, the beautiful touch of your loved ones, and many such things.  Do you know, just by sensing any of the sense organs completely, the feelings you experience can be as...