Have you ever felt that the fear created by your mind was more intense than the actual face of that feared moment? And if you would not have feared it, you would have responded better had it been a spontaneous moment?
Didn’t get it? Don’ worry…Let us simplify it by comprehending the process.
The process where you fear your fear…
The problem starts with thinking about the fear right from the outset you get to know that you have to face an unusual situation. It soon turns into an apprehension.
You begin to take the unnecessary stress. As a result, you get detached from the present moment. Your mind gets engrossed in thinking only about one thing-your feared moment…
Surprisingly, after the actualization of the feared moment, you realize that you could have dealt better with it. But the real problem was the fear of the fear, with the actual intensity of the problem being very low.
You know, this way, you never win over your fear, and the fear retains inside you, as you did not kill it. I am sure that you have gone through this process many times.
A few realizations…
Fear has nothing to do with being brave or coward. Everyone fears and it is quite human to fear. Sometimes, it even works as a boon because it allows you to prepare well to face it. Yes, thinking about how to deal with your fear is fine.
But keep fearing that moment until it arrives is quite disturbing. It will never let you deal with it. You will never be able to overcome that fear. Adding to your plight, fearing the fear gives birth to many other non-existing fears. Not only that, it also kills the essence and feel of the now.
So, you see, it is all connected and is a vicious circle.
Reasons why you fear…
1. Non-awareness of mind in the present moment
When you are not aware in the present moment, you do not live the life surrounding you(the real life), instead, you live the life in your mind(imaginary life). As a result, you think about it too much which leads to stress and apprehensions.
2. Low in inner-self attributes
When you are low in your inner-self attributes like self-confidence and self-esteem, you don’t back yourself to overcome your fear and it keeps on revolving inside your mind, leading to worries and apprehensions.
3. An unpleasant past
When you have a troubled past, you start relating those dark instances of the past to the upcoming feared moments, leading to your best friend-stress…
It is connected to your aura. If you do not dwell on your own aura, the others’ aura becomes dominant on you. As a result, your thinking will be defined by others. And in the process, you are bound to fear people.
Straight out solution…
When you are right according to you, don’t care even if it is wrong according to people. Just back your right with positive attitude and confidence.
Often, it is the change which you are afraid of. The situations which force you to step out of your comfort zone are usually the unusual situations, which becomes the cause of your fear.
Straight out solution…
You just need to alter your thinking because unless you welcome the new, you will never be able to expand the boundaries of your comfort zone. And you know it very well that if you want to excel in life, you need to challenge those boundaries.
The deadliest fear… I do not intend to scare you. Other fears can be illusionary but not the fear of death. It is destiny. It is bound to happen. And this the reason which makes it hard to conquer. Any other fear can be eliminated by facing it. But this rule does not apply in case of death…obvious reasons, right?
Straight out solution…
A man’s biggest fear Death is not only inevitable but it is always round the corner. Yes, we are all going to die one day…when? how? nobody knows… but one thing is for sure…DEATH. This is why acceptance has a huge role to play. The sooner we accept it, the easier it becomes for us to overcome the fear of death. Since death is certain, one profound lesson we must take from it is to live every moment. And trust me, once you overcome the fear of death, fear of people and situations will not be challenging anymore. Life will become an adventurous trip… So, Stop dying before you die.
The reason is that not only your mind but also your body feels the fear. It is difficult to control the mind and body simultaneously…And this is what makes it a tough battle.
Conquering the fear…
Ask yourself that why am I making my life journey painful fearing the fear?
My dear friend, either you can dread your fear and make it worse for you… Else face it courageously and kill it. Always remember, the one who fears always fears, only the reason to fear changes…
If your boarded flight is supposed to crash, it will crash. You cannot land on a parachute unless you are pilot on that flight. Exactly, the same is applicable to your life journey. Either become the pilot of your life journey and do something about your fear or let your fear drive you the way it wants to. The choice is entirely yours…
Always remember that fear is your mind’s creation which does not has a documented existence. You fear about the future in the now. It is created by your past which haunts your future. Surprisingly, it has nothing to do with your present.
Time for some Happy Realizations…
I know overcoming fear including the fear of death, is not easy. But trust me, it is not impossible either.
Don’t let your fear haunt you; Approach it, face it and kill it… Only a few feelings can match the feeling of overcoming fear. It acts as a base to overcome the upcoming fears.
The fight with your fear is actually a fight with yourself. Keep challenging yourself and keep pushing your limits. The best way of overcoming fear is by MEDITATION… Nothing above it. Meditation makes you aware of the now. It refrains you from overthinking, which is the biggest reason for fear.
Always remember that ‘FEAR KILLS HAPPINESS.’ Kill your fear or else the fear will kill you. Look straight into the eyes of fear and shout “Bring it on because I am ready now”… Yes mate, always welcome the change instead of fearing it.
P.S- I have to say this…There may be times when there is no escape from facing pain(physical/mental) inducing situations… My dear friend, if you cannot do anything to change it, there is no other way than to accept it. It will make it easier for you to bear the pain. Or else the fear of that facing it will keep inducing pain now, then, every moment. I didn’t want to say it but it is a cruel truth. Sometimes, Acceptance of pain is also a pain-reliever.