Success and Happiness

A lockdown for bodies, but minds still wandering... And this distance between mind and body — it’s turning the inevitable pain into self-made suffering. But that’s the downside!! Let’s talk about the upside... the positives through this period. Let’s try to experience these happy realizations: 1. Death connecting us to life People are dying everywhere. It provokes fear of death now and then at every heart, no different you and me. But amidst all these did you realize: We literally experienced our biggest fear Death sitting at home? Gracious we are alive!  Is there a bigger blessing? I don’t think so. Let’s celebrate life with a toast to breath as the biggest reason to smile. 2. Higher sensitivity towards poverty and hunger It’s not only about this lockdown when the poor are dying of hunger. Earlier, most of us could only sympathize. We could not take that one step further — to think about doing something for them. Why? Either shortage of time or our own lives in a turmoil. Now as we standstill, there are more volunteers to think about the poor. This lockdown has taken our sympathies to another level. And that’s wonderful! 3. Turning faces towards the real mirror — Self-awareness We are denied worldly experiences ongoing lockdown. But this phase made us dig deep within to feel ourselves.  The deeper we touch, the darker it feels!! But do you know the sunnier part? At least we are facing the real mirror! We are meeting ourselves everyday. We are knowing ourselves more! No matter beautiful or ugly reflects our face in the real mirror of self-awareness, we are experiencing the taste of our company. It is leading to self-acceptance — the foundation of self-love! 4. Inculcating a new interest Earlier we never got this length of me-time. With a lockdown of direct connections with the outside world, the sharpness of the mind has less to dissect. Maybe it’s time for the soul to reach a deeper dimension without self-judgments. Picking up that half-read old book from the shelf, Tuning-in the chords of the broken guitar, Scribbling emotions in our personal diary,  Pursuing the hobby left out of responsibility, Learning different meditation or yoga practices, Let it be anything that pulls our interest! Who knows, we discover an artist within who flares the life-spark rest of our lives. 5. Connection with smiling nature after decades  Neither money is having the last laugh nor the people. It’s nature smiling! We must feel happy for them.  After all this damage, it resurrected! The air turned cleaner; the tress became greener; the water got purer. Guess what? The renewed nature is blessing us with a healthy life! Do we really need anything else? I feel nothing can draw our interest more than getting richer with nature’s wealth. Let’s celebrate nature, preserve the wealth it’s bestowing! 6. Our battle is always in the inside We have been our comparing lives with people, competing against them. Conveniently we have been blaming them for all the wrong happening with us. But about this time, we are not against outside; we are exploring the truth: We have been battling against our illusions. And it is always about the inside! We are meeting our inner critic... the real audience. And it’s an original ball game altogether. No doubt the battle has got tougher but...

What defines your monotonous life? My boredom? Our generation’s boring monotony? A haunting tradition following since the X generation! It’s a pre-defined conventional journey — starts with a super-active child at home, an exuberant kid in school, an adventurous youth in college, and then? As soon as you enter the late twenties and early thirties, don’t you feel:We are puppets dancing off-beat to the tune of a monotonous life? You won’t disagree more or less we share a common story. We’ll talk a little about every phase starting teenage. The time before that does not qualify for scrutiny. We were happy souls then. The tender teenage is the age when most of us are on an exploring spree. It’s the most exciting phase when most of us are introduced to new experiences. The thrills of hormonal attraction, the adventure of bunking classes, the excitement of a new cellphone, fear of failures, sadness inflicting loss, and whatnot… Life events are not customary and that’s the best part of this time. Every moment awaits to capture a new experience. Moving to the next phase is the dawn of adulthood (the twenty-one's) when most of us go through a full range of overwhelming emotions, and gradually we prioritize and move forward with our choices and responses. But what next? Don’t you realize life stagnates thereafter? Yes… the majority of us stand at the doorstep of a monotonous life. ‘That’s because we turn into:spouses and parents in personal livesan employee or an employer in a professional careera mere reputation in the social environmentTill over and out.’ Please keep reading even if you haven’t reached this state, you are closer than you think! That’s because soon a customary routine takes over to define our life’s monotonous process until we final gasp. Most have compromised with it. But you don’t belong there, the reason you are here. Allow me to offer: 4 super effective ways to break the monotony of everyday life: Twist the thought process When you program your mind into a routine existence; your mind becomes a jailor and your soul a prisoner. Your life isn’t a beautiful exploration journey anymore. I may sound silly if I ask you: Do you wait for the holidays? Everyone does! Most of us work our asses off the entire week to enjoy on weekends. But does that mean you are eligible for happiness only on weekends? I don’t know much but I am sure about this: We cannot assign a particular date, time, and place for happiness. My friend; even happiness seems monotonous this way. What I feel we need this break every day. Any small conscious mind break is capable to break your routine existence. Listening to music, exercising, or maybe a long drive — any such monotony breaker not involving your mind is capable to rejuvenate your soul. And when you do that, you realize happiness does not involve the mind, it’s an essence of the soul. Did you know? Not only feeling happiness, but a mind rest daily can also raise its potency drastically. Here is a summary of recent research and thinking on the value of taking breaks. Start it now or else your holiday break remains a random...

I wish you undress. Watching you nude would be a wonderful treat. Now before you judge, it’s your mental body I’m talking about! Sounds silly? it’s not: Unwrapping your mental body is as vital as wrapping your physical body. Let's unwrap!   Differences between Nude and Naked  I’m sure your mental body doesn’t wear clothes. It's lying nude but people cannot see you for a simple reason:You don't express your vulnerable originality. (It can be need of your hour), but at least accept your nudity than to live in fear of exposed naked.  I feel: When you unveil your orginality by yourself, you are nude.  When others expose it, you are naked. Seems nuance, but there is a huge difference between the two.   John Berger says:   Nakedness reveals itself. Nudity is placed on display. The nude is condemned to never being naked. Nudity is a form of dress.   The journey to nudity is a painful transformation where you learn the subtle art of giving a damn about people.   Still Confused?   There’s one beautiful citation by MENTAL FLOSS illustrating the difference between naked and nude:   “If you doff your duds to pose while descending a staircase for a tasteful painting done by a respected artist, then you’re nude. If a bunch of paparazzi suddenly burst in through the studio door and take your picture without permission, you are suddenly naked.”   Nude is better than Naked You age, you mature, you ripe while growing in age. Your personality flows with time! Your ‘then and now’ might have a discrepancy.  And now: You want to adapt for own good; Wish to age like a fine wine.  You strive to flow with time; Want to experience your journey consciously. Like to become more and more you!   What's holding you to unleash? People already have an opinion about you. They recognize you a particular way.  And you want to break that monotony! You know you have changed; you want others to accept it. But the grey:  You are afraid of how people will perceive your transformation!!   As bitter as it gets People cannot take it if you grow more than them. They are jealous of your self-awareness.   They crib over your maturity. Your clarity offends them.   People piss off when you attend them less.   No denial, even you have been guilty. But it’s human to commit mistakes; right? This is how we learn. You are probably wondering:Is showcasing nudity that easy? No, it’s not! People restrict you. They try every way to intercept your transformation. Cry, yell, request, they do it all!   But before you quit Showcase one performance where you go all in to become nude. Yes, gather courage to express yourself only once.   Reach out to them and let your soul scream — This is my originality; Accept or Leave!   Trust me, you’ll never have to cover your face with an illusory mask of fear again.   One firm step towards finding yourself is worth giving a shot. One bold attempt to get nude is always better than getting your exposed by people.   Wondering why nudity is paramount? To breathe freely!   Because today or tomorrow they find the real you hiding. You cannot run away from yourself for long.   A few sympathize, most of them call you a liar.   The unbearable suffering is hard to deal with. Your self-esteem reaches...

Straight out, it is your way of looking at things and people. Negativity is only the one side of the coin. Yes, there could be many things happening around you that you don’t like. In fact, there are two set of things leading to negativity... Things happening around you, which can be seen by everyone... Every another day, you read the newspapers or scroll down on facebook to find out about the brutal crimes, the freaking accidents, the untimely demises, the deadly diseases, the uprooting poverty and many such incidents to affect you adversely for quite some time. Things happening inside you, which can only be seen by you... It is good to be self-aware but yes, you may not always look beautiful when you see yourself in the mirror. And when you don't do something about the same, it infuses elements fuelling negativity. Those elements are jealousy, comparison with others, pervert thoughts, materialistic addiction, self-harming thoughts and so on. Interestingly, there is a sub-category in this aspect. And this category is negativity because of expectations. Always remember that expectations from people and of people, both infuses negativity. It is because sometimes the expectations are fulfilled and sometimes not. And when the expectations fail because of betrayals, broken trusts or failures, it's by-product feeling induces negativity. If are not a victim of it yet, keep sailing the way you are. And if you have gone through it, not a problem either. The only thing is that you learned it the hard way. The good thing about these things happening to you is that it teaches you the best of life lessons, if you are ready to perceive it that way. The worst part... When you cannot stop and change the wrong happenings, it leads to negativity. See, there are different kinds of people living on this planet. All are different and somewhere that is the cause of stability as well. If you ask me how to get rid of it... You cannot change the course of nature. Everything is not under your control. But yes, you are fully in control of the things happening around you and inside you. And if something is happening wrong, be aware of it and take the responsibility of changing it. Nonetheless, what you can do is see the other side of the coin; THE POSITIVE SIDE. There could also be people who love you. There could be many things and situations which are favorable to you. There could be your credentials and achievements, which might give you a sense of pride and self-motivation. Friends, why are you not able to feel and realize it? The reason could be you are too busy sniffing the negativity than to count your blessings. What else you can do is start expressing your negativity in any form, be it by speaking out, writing, exercising, be it any form as you look. But never retain it inside. You know, expressing negativity in any form is also your deliberate attempt to convert your negativity into positivity. Time for some Practical Realizations...  Look, the ideal conditions are not...

Struggling to discover the success ways? As minors, most of us are fortunate to have parents guide us to our next move. In schools and colleges, we have teachers and professors as our mentors.    But as soon as we are independent, we have to battle out our success ways alone.   Is your question How to become successful still struggling to find the best answer? Rest easy! there are many like you striving to define life on their own terms. Yes… the best characteristic of this phase is it’s nondiscriminatory and spares none.  And when we’re all in this, let’s battle it out together. Everyone cannot afford the best of life coaches, and so, success tips to inject motivation is the need of the hour!   Allow me to offer: 25 ways to be successful, tips to achieve anything  you want in life Fail… to never repeat it again For me, Success is an elusive mask of realization covering lifeless faces of countless failures. Successful people think about failures as their favorite lessons. They don't criticize, instead, embrace them. Yes, there is no substitution to experiencing failures for teaching the best ways to be successful. Don’t be apprehensive about it. Taste failures to explore the possibilities of a breakdown, to never encounter them anymore, and eventually achieve success. Related: The Most Successful Failure Listen to your gut over people Today’s customary obstacle in our success ways is people’s advice, always ready irrespective we seek or not. What worse, we believe in most without trusting our instincts.My friend… only you have the right answers to your questions. Listen to everybody but authorize your instinct to make the final call. Stop expecting people to stop fulfilling their undue expectations When all have inner demons, let's combat like a one-man-army.Needing people to fulfill undue expectations seizes independence. You expect from people, they seek from you.This give-take relationship is infectious. Explore ways to do it yourself to negate the effect of people obstructing success ways. Related: You lose via expectations Never surrender to inevitable lows When we struggle to find ways to be successful, there comes a point when we hit the rock bottom. Every way out seems impossible. Hard time this!But again, this rough patch is customary to every individual and is the real test of patience. The best you can is allowing it move on with awareness, without judgments. Related: Let go the hard times Take breaks to prevent your drive transform into a baggage Sometimes, we push ourselves much into actions of achieving it takes a toll on the quality of output. Productivity suffers and exuberance fades away.Take it easy. No need to carry unnecessary load to overperform and lose enthusiasm in the process. Let it be slow, smooth, effortless. Go ask for help (Don't feel shy) Not every but a few steps in your struggle period need guiding light. You cannot analyze every dimension of problem by yourself because of a simple reason — you didn’t face it before. And the next step just doesn’t have an answer. So that’s fine if you seek help from someone to bail you out. That’s...

Do you pick up and eat whatever life throws at you? Does submission to destiny define your monotonous life? monotonous life: If you could sense any bit, let’s unlock the unsung reality. Nobody knows what’s coming, but what worse than settling down with customary existence; as repetitive as a seconds’ ticker. If your life ride is sans the three E’s- Exploration, Endurance, Expressiveness; you are an overplayed song on the radio. I am sure we are dying to break the boring monotony of your mere apparent existence. Let’s unlock the first step: Exploration Life enthusiasts define life as an exploration journey. Have you ever introspected your life travel? In case you don’t know: You are responsible to explore two journeys: The one is a reciprocation to the outside world The other is the response to the inside world This may sound like a boring topic of a lengthy lecture but trust me it’s all-important. Your outside world comprises people and situations. And your inner sphere revolves around you as an individual regardless of anyone and anything external.  Do you know what happens if you aren’t a curious explorer of your inner world? People’s expectation overburdens you with obligations, which bows you down to a boring monotony. I was a part of this sad story; I’m trying hard to write my individual script.   Let me ask you a simple question good enough to make you realize the significance of inner-self exploration: How do you start your day? By getting out of the bed... right? Wrong... there’s something you do prior to it. You open your beautiful eyes which simultaneously activates a certain level of consciousness of your mind.  Subsequently, a primary thought of the morning takes a small stride to initiate your inner exploration. Do you realize it? Because that’s the biggest problem: Most of us are unaware our inside travel engine is leaking fuel. How ironic: The outside world concerns most of us; the pull of the inner world is seeking experience. The reason it is untouched by many is it does not have an apparent existence. But what you don’t comprehend: If you are a puppet to the outer world due to a lack of the inner world exploration- the monotony prevails... Why? Because you didn’t explore your ability to break it!  The best solution: Liberate your inner world to take the call for your outer world. Never allow people and situations to dictate your monotonous life. To reach that level of consciousness, you need to meditate. Just because you never meditated, it doesn’t mean you cannot. Check out 8 meditation techniques for complete beginners... And when you succeed in a better exploration of your inner world, you define happiness your way.  This is when you are ready to unveil the second E. Endurance Wikipedia defines endurance as the ability of an organism to exert itself and remain active for a long period of time, as well as its ability to resist, withstand, recover from, and have immunity to trauma, wounds, or fatigue. Yes... it is all about continuing to move forward bearing hardships. Do you endure? If not, it’s a sensitive indicator you live a monotonous life. Ever wondered who endures? The one who explored the inner world beautifully to find a dream;...

Before evaluating the differences, let's find out the similarity between both the attitude.  Did you notice that both the attitude have four consecutive letters in common-'LOSE'? You know what does it mean? It means that both the attitude(loser/nothing to lose) are provoked by a loss. Now, there are two possible conditions involving a loss.  You are on the verge of losing. You have already lost. Subsequently, when you encounter any of the above-mentioned situations,  it provokes either a 'nothing to lose' attitude or you develop a 'loser attitude'.   An example involving sports where you are on the verge of losing... Two players are playing a game of squash inside two different courts.  The game is of 5 sets. Both the players lose the first two sets. Obviously, the recovery seems extremely difficult hereon. Now, let us try to compare and analyze their respective attitude where one develops a loser attitude while the other develops a nothing to lose attitude.  The one with the ‘loser attitude:’ After losing the first two sets out of five, the person with a negative mindset starts considering himself as a loser even before the result of the game. It evokes fear inside him and he begins saying to himself that he cannot win from this particular game-situation. Eventually, he surrenders to a situation and showcases a ‘loser attitude’ in the subsequent game-set. This attitude fails to deliver miserably, no need to mention the outcome. The one with the ‘nothing to lose attitude.’   A person with a positive frame of mind sees things differently. After losing the first two sets, he sets himself free. Even he starts considering himself as a loser but with a different mindset. As soon as he accepts his loss, he starts seeing it as a different ball game altogether. It evokes a fearless attitude within him as he is already considering himself as a loser. He starts feeling that he cannot go down anymore and plays the rest of the game carefree and stress-free. Trust me, most of the times he is able to turn the tables around from nowhere, and an evident lose turns out to be a surprising victory. Let us consider a monetary example where the loss has already occurred: Two businessmen suffered a huge financial loss in their respective trades. The one with a loser attitude: The person with the loser attitude starts feeling embarrassed and ashamed. He is not able to sink that loss inside his mind. As a result, it never lets him overcome that loss or defeat. That fear of losing refrains him from starting again. As a result, he always considers himself a loser.  The one with a nothing to lose attitude: There is the other businessman who considers it as an opportunity, the opportunity to start from scratch, where he cannot go down beyond it. This attitude allows him to realize his mistakes so that he never repeats it again. Time for some Happy Realizations!!! Friends, we all lose on something at some point in time.  But what makes us a loser or winner depends...

Do you only feel negative during this lockdown? With pain and helplessness all around, With your self-identity forced to switch roles, With a jolted normal for unpredictably long, The thought pop ups cannot be exciting. Infact most of them are negative... Relax... that's human! And it's not only your story. This is the first time we fall on the same page.  But maybe... this lockdown... most of us went all too far. Let's Address the Problem Fear... Dilemmas... Uncertainties... Anxiety... You are thinking too much about the future.  Overflowing thoughts drive you everywhere you don't want to reach. Now that lays the foundation of a quandary. Because when this unconscious flow of thoughts continues, it leads to mental diarrhea, which soon attacks your emotions.  Ahh... now that hurts! With thoughts already conflicting, this lockdown came up with another challenge... Managing emotions... a bigger task than managing mind. Do you know what's the result of mismanaged thoughts and emotions? Your crude feelings turn negative!! Once your feelings turn negative, no matter how hard you try, you cannot feel happy.  And that's what is happening to most of us.... sitting at homes... having nothing to do.  Bodies are locked down, but minds still wandering. Painful state this... densely negative!  The good news: We can get out of here. Let's talk about the revival now! How to Revive From State Where Feelings Turned Negative? Arrange a session You with Yourself where you are disconnected from the outside world.  No people, no cell phones, no distraction whatsoever... Start with a minimum of 30 min session whenever you get Time. Time... not a difficult thing to find during this lockdown... isn’t it? I agree some of my friends would get offended about that. And that's because there are many samaritans who volunteered to step out of their houses to serve people and nation in anyways. And there are also individuals who could not afford Me time as they were, and still are busy with their household chores. But I must say, sacrifice that 30 min of sleep even if you have to, but during this lockdown, everyone needs that session, that session of self-introspection. So what do you do in that session? Do nothing different! Quitely get back to basics... Remind yourself that everything started with your mind... overflowing with negative thoughts... for an extended period. And that's what touched the depth of feelings. So to revive your positive feelings, you need to get back to your thoughts. Go for it! Just sit comfortably, preferably with closed eyes, and observe your thoughts coming and leaving. Don't pay attention to any. Allow them to pass by. Stop participating.... stop involving with any thought... even the ones you call positive.              We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. — Buddha Why do you stop paying attention to positive thoughts? You might be wondering: No attention to negative thoughts... sounds logical! But why should I stop paying attention to positive thoughts? Because that's a ploy. That's deliberate from the mind to convince you to interact with thoughts. So that you hook to it... and finally get carried away by the flow of it. It's a mind's...

My dear friend, starting from head-tail, good-evil, right-wrong, everything is double-faced. Even a story or a debate has two angles. And you know what, we, the humans are no different. The fact which we all need to get acquainted with is that we have two bulls inside us fighting with each other. Let’s find out who wins? Naturally, our physical body needs food. It is the food we eat which keeps us up and running. Without a second thought, food is the fuel for the physical body. But one thing to observe is the food we eat, the diet we follow is our choice… healthy or unhealthy? And there is a difference in how we feel following either of the diets. While healthy food makes us feel fresh and energy-boosted, the unhealthy food lowers our energy and freshness level. No brainer, you know these things, but there is a reason I am saying this... My dear friend, much like our physical body, which runs on what we eat, our mental body runs on what we feed. I’ll come straight to the point, there are two bulls inside our mind. These bulls feed on two different feeds. Interestingly, only one feed is available at a point. As a result, one bull is always hungry, and the other bull is always full. And so, the fight is always on between the two to get their respective feed. Who are these bulls? Why do they fight? What is their food? Why can’t we feed them together? What is the source of their food? These might be some of your questions seeking answers.  Yes, now the time has come to meet both the bulls... Let us meet the first bull: This bull is always happy, positive, compassionate, cheerful, stress-free, high on inner-self attributes, and hence high on life. I call it the Saint’s bull, which is always hungry for positive emotions. It feeds on joy, gratitude, pride, love which it attracts from the outside world. We can say it is the healthy food which the saint’s bull craves for!!! Let us meet the second bull: This bull inside us is always sad, angry, frustrated, low in inner-self attributes, and hence is depressed all the time. I call it a Demon’s bull, which is always hungry for negative emotions. This bull feeds on hatred, stress, jealousy which it attracts from the outside world. We can conclude that it is the unhealthy food which the demon’s bull craves for!!! Now, when we have met both the bulls, let’s talk about the availability of feed for the bulls.  Situations providing food to the Saint’s bull: The arrival of a newborn Monetary gains and profits Job promotion Success in any competitive field Accomplishment of goals A celebration party These are some situations from our personal and professional sphere in which the saint’s bull gets the feed from the outside world. This is why we feel happy and joyous in these situations. Let us find out the instances which provide food to the demon’s bull: Loss of life of a loved one Monetary Losses Failure in a competition Embarrassments and Criticisms In these situations, the only feed available from...

Failure or Success- A perspective… When a coin is tossed, there's a 50% chance it will land upon the side you bet. Similar is our outcome in different chores we perform in our life. One major difference that differentiates our life with tossing of the coin is that we put in a lot of devotion and hard work in our efforts.  "Success is not final; failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts." ~Winston Churchill But similar to the tossing of a coin, those chores may result in either success or failure. Sometimes even after extreme hard work and perseverance, the outcome is a failure, leaving us shattered. What happens when failure is the outcome?  Failure is the outcome of mere bad luck or a minor fault which we don't realize while enduring. We regret about failures when all our efforts go in vain and nothing fruitful comes out.  We get disheartened, thinking we will never succeed and then delve into the domain of negative thoughts. Students failing in competitive exams, people facing rejections while seeking employment; Life has become a battlefield where success is adjourned as the winner, while failure is looked with pity, remorse, and guilt. This outlook needs tweaking. What to comprehend? Success is a destination, but it is the journey full of failures, that deserves an appreciation. ‘Success is that lively and elusive mask of realization, which covers the various lifeless faces of failures.’ Happy Realization People fail to realize that they would never commit that same mistake again in their lives ever. If they had tasted success in that only attempt then maybe this mistake would have cost them severely.  We need to realize that the failure causing such heart-wrenching grief to their heart, is just due to a minor mistake, a temporary glitch that can be rectified in the next attempt.  We need to realize quickly that we are not failures alone. Everyone, and I repeat, everyone who is successful has failed on numerous occasions to reach where he/she is. we just have to accept those glitches as normal, without overthinking about it. and move on, and move on. Obviously, it ain't easy, the reason we have fewer success stories. People have to take a huge leap of faith to do that. Even though society may blame you, criticize you at an unbearable level, trust me, you can bear them all, provided you compete with none other than oneself. The course of action: Analyze: This is the most crucial tool to avoid failures in the upcoming future. The secret to success lies in your failures. People have to just analyze them carefully and draw the point of errors or flaws, and vouch to never repeat them. Plan: Devise a new plan of approach omitting the mistakes you have analyzed. Use new techniques that you will be able to apply. Avoid sticking to the customary ones which have stopped delivering results. Enact: Apply the whole plan step by step and execute it as per your calculations. Don’t deviate in the greed of achieving more. In pursuit of greed, you may even lose what you aspire, which...