Love and Relationships

Simply, Indecisiveness is the inability to take a decision. An indecisive person is confused whether they should take a left, a right or to stick with the current position. The positive side of it is that we have the liberty and option to chose. In fact, there is no problem in taking some time to choose the right option. However, things get complicated when we spend too much time evaluating the pros and cons associated with making the right decision. Let us try to comprehend the 7 reasons for indecisiveness and the ways to counter it: 1. Prolonged thinking  The foremost reason is thinking too much in the evaluation of the pros n cons attached to the decision-making. It creates a never-ending confusion, which refrains us from taking a decision. Solution- No doubt, it is important to think before making a decision but let us not over-think to create a mental blockage wherein our mind loses the ability to decide.  2. Too many available options  Many a time, the delight to savor several choices turns out to be an upset. The flickering mind creates a chaos inside the mind, which adds to the inability to decide. Solution- We need to understand that we cannot have everything. Let us respect the options available, and chose the one which is our priority.   3. Fear of choosing wrong  At times, the indecisiveness is because we fear that the decision we would take might prove to be wrong. This apprehension keeps us away from inclination towards a choice. When we fear failures, we start recalling our previous decisions which proved wrong. Subsequently, we unnecessarily put extra pressure on ourselves to take the correct decision. Solution- We need to sink into mind that failures are the gateways to success. Let us not allow the past failures to affect our current decision-making process. 4. Thinking 'what people will think' Sometimes, we want to please everyone with our decision. As a result, we start emphasizing too much on the people’s opinion about the options available.  In the process, our ability to take the right decision gets hampered. Solution- There is no harm in listening to everybody, but we also need to realize that people are never short of opinions and suggestions. Let us never authorize anyone to decide on our behalf. And also, let us stop getting affected by what they will think about it.   5. Not listening to the conscious self  More often than not, we don't listen to our inner voice, the voice which is right most of the times. When we don’t trust the answers from within us at the first place, it infuses the dilemmas leading to indecisiveness and eventually resulting in poor decision-making. Solution- Rest assured, most of the times, we have the right answer. We need to patiently wait for the answer which is within us, trust our instincts and go with the flow. This way, we enjoy all the credentials all alone and even if the decision proves to be wrong, at least we do not have people to blame. 6. The desire for the ideal condition  If the decision-making is tough, it means there are...

Before evaluating the differences, let's find out the similarity between both the attitude.  Did you notice that both the attitude have four consecutive letters in common-'LOSE'? You know what does it mean? It means that both the attitude(loser/nothing to lose) are provoked by a loss. Now, there are two possible conditions involving a loss.  You are on the verge of losing. You have already lost. Subsequently, when you encounter any of the above-mentioned situations,  it provokes either a 'nothing to lose' attitude or you develop a 'loser attitude'.   An example involving sports where you are on the verge of losing... Two players are playing a game of squash inside two different courts.  The game is of 5 sets. Both the players lose the first two sets. Obviously, the recovery seems extremely difficult hereon. Now, let us try to compare and analyze their respective attitude where one develops a loser attitude while the other develops a nothing to lose attitude.  The one with the ‘loser attitude:’ After losing the first two sets out of five, the person with a negative mindset starts considering himself as a loser even before the result of the game. It evokes fear inside him and he begins saying to himself that he cannot win from this particular game-situation. Eventually, he surrenders to a situation and showcases a ‘loser attitude’ in the subsequent game-set. This attitude fails to deliver miserably, no need to mention the outcome. The one with the ‘nothing to lose attitude.’   A person with a positive frame of mind sees things differently. After losing the first two sets, he sets himself free. Even he starts considering himself as a loser but with a different mindset. As soon as he accepts his loss, he starts seeing it as a different ball game altogether. It evokes a fearless attitude within him as he is already considering himself as a loser. He starts feeling that he cannot go down anymore and plays the rest of the game carefree and stress-free. Trust me, most of the times he is able to turn the tables around from nowhere, and an evident lose turns out to be a surprising victory. Let us consider a monetary example where the loss has already occurred: Two businessmen suffered a huge financial loss in their respective trades. The one with a loser attitude: The person with the loser attitude starts feeling embarrassed and ashamed. He is not able to sink that loss inside his mind. As a result, it never lets him overcome that loss or defeat. That fear of losing refrains him from starting again. As a result, he always considers himself a loser.  The one with a nothing to lose attitude: There is the other businessman who considers it as an opportunity, the opportunity to start from scratch, where he cannot go down beyond it. This attitude allows him to realize his mistakes so that he never repeats it again. Time for some Happy Realizations!!! Friends, we all lose on something at some point in time.  But what makes us a loser or winner depends...

Do you only feel negative during this lockdown? With pain and helplessness all around, With your self-identity forced to switch roles, With a jolted normal for unpredictably long, The thought pop ups cannot be exciting. Infact most of them are negative... Relax... that's human! And it's not only your story. This is the first time we fall on the same page.  But maybe... this lockdown... most of us went all too far. Let's Address the Problem Fear... Dilemmas... Uncertainties... Anxiety... You are thinking too much about the future.  Overflowing thoughts drive you everywhere you don't want to reach. Now that lays the foundation of a quandary. Because when this unconscious flow of thoughts continues, it leads to mental diarrhea, which soon attacks your emotions.  Ahh... now that hurts! With thoughts already conflicting, this lockdown came up with another challenge... Managing emotions... a bigger task than managing mind. Do you know what's the result of mismanaged thoughts and emotions? Your crude feelings turn negative!! Once your feelings turn negative, no matter how hard you try, you cannot feel happy.  And that's what is happening to most of us.... sitting at homes... having nothing to do.  Bodies are locked down, but minds still wandering. Painful state this... densely negative!  The good news: We can get out of here. Let's talk about the revival now! How to Revive From State Where Feelings Turned Negative? Arrange a session You with Yourself where you are disconnected from the outside world.  No people, no cell phones, no distraction whatsoever... Start with a minimum of 30 min session whenever you get Time. Time... not a difficult thing to find during this lockdown... isn’t it? I agree some of my friends would get offended about that. And that's because there are many samaritans who volunteered to step out of their houses to serve people and nation in anyways. And there are also individuals who could not afford Me time as they were, and still are busy with their household chores. But I must say, sacrifice that 30 min of sleep even if you have to, but during this lockdown, everyone needs that session, that session of self-introspection. So what do you do in that session? Do nothing different! Quitely get back to basics... Remind yourself that everything started with your mind... overflowing with negative thoughts... for an extended period. And that's what touched the depth of feelings. So to revive your positive feelings, you need to get back to your thoughts. Go for it! Just sit comfortably, preferably with closed eyes, and observe your thoughts coming and leaving. Don't pay attention to any. Allow them to pass by. Stop participating.... stop involving with any thought... even the ones you call positive.              We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. — Buddha Why do you stop paying attention to positive thoughts? You might be wondering: No attention to negative thoughts... sounds logical! But why should I stop paying attention to positive thoughts? Because that's a ploy. That's deliberate from the mind to convince you to interact with thoughts. So that you hook to it... and finally get carried away by the flow of it. It's a mind's...

Becoming a father is a boon. Becoming a father of a girl child is a bigger blessing.  most of the fathers know what their daughter means to them. However, having accepted this, I’m sorry to admit that I am not sure whether I want to become a father of a daughter... Here I begin... what I feel and why I feel so!!! My wife is expecting a baby. She is on top of the world. I cannot express how overjoyed she is. Everyone in the family is happy. But if you ask about my feelings, it’s a mixed feeling. Just not able to put it down into words. I am excited but at the same time; I am nervous. I am not sure whether I shall be able to justify the responsibilities of a father. One thing which always scares me–responsibilities. I still remember the day she told me she missed her monthlies…. I freaked out; I was shocked. Haha…quite contrary to the response she was expecting. At least I can laugh it off today. Now she is 6 months pregnant and yes, the feeling of a to-be father has completely sunk in. It’s not that I had to accept it and so such a feeling. No, not at all. To be honest, it’s a magical feeling. All the fathers and to-be fathers can know how it feels when your wife makes you feel your child’s kicks inside the womb. Not to forget the feel of topsy-turvy movements, swear on God, apprehensions if any, are flushed out at that time. Everyone in the family is waiting for that time, they call it the D-day. And now, my family along with friends and relatives are asking us, what are you expecting- a boy or a girl? One of the few big things they want to know from you at that time. Well, my answer to them is clear, ‘I don’t care, only my child should be healthy at the time of birth, that’s it.’   Huh...... really? Do I feel this way? Does my mind has the same clarity as my words? Well, I am sorry but I am not sure. ‘I don’t care’ is what I always believed but not today. There are a lot of uncertainties and unanswered questions today. Don’t worry about my wife’s choice because they will not judge her choice. But somehow I think if a to-be father wants a son and not a daughter, he is judged and questioned. And the same is happening to me. I fear that everyone, including my family, will judge my decision.  But now, it’s high-time I need to tell the reasons behind my answer. Moreover, I want to answer on behalf of many who think alike but prefer to stay silent. First of all, I am not a male chauvinist. I am not that dirty narrow-minded pig who supports gender inequality. No, I am not looking at a maybe-son as my successor and to tell the truth, I am strictly against the dowry system. Rest assured, I am not killing my maybe-daughter inside the womb either. I respect...

Have you been hunting for ways to transform into a happier self? It is time to call shots and make some big changes in life.  Well, little did you know but creating a happy bubble around you is easy-peasy. The secret lies in unleashing the potential in you so that you become your best version. Kiss goodbye to anxiety because happiness is not hard-found. Being happy is easier than you think.  So, are you great at chalking out plans and strategies but not quite efficient in implementing them? No problem! Digging into the best of self-improvement books can help you rule out every little hurdle, standing in the way of you and a good life. Believe it or not but self-help books work like magic. Taking cues from the insights shared by the greatest minds in the world, reading lines that are inspiring and healing and getting a hang of simple, developmental exercises, the perks of engaging in self-improvement books are way more than you can imagine.  Wondering where to start? Don’t worry because here’s a curated list of 10 best self-improvement books of 2020 Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert If you’ve been dreaming of taking pleasure in a fairytale life, Big Magic is a must-read. The author has splendidly jotted down stories, spilling beans about her experiences with magic and creativity. Read more to find out what makes her life so much happy and fulfilling. Buy Now Here - Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear   Time Management Secrets by Martin Manser Do you struggle to execute a job perfectly when your plate is too full? Well, Time Management Secrets is a winning aid for you. Explore the fundamentals of time management and give your career the much-needed wings. Read about the ways of strategizing and recognizing your priorities. The book includes priceless words of wisdom from experts in business circles. Learn the ropes of necessary work ethics, analyze the importance of communication and every other knick-knack, important to hit the easy-street.  Buy Now Here : Time Management: Collins Business Secrets   Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis Is your life topsy-turvy? Well, Rachel Hollis is here to tell you that it is okay to have a messy life. However, to make it a joyful space and make life a smooth-sailing, one must get over the bait of procrastinating and lying to oneself. It is a big hurdle that does a lot of damage. Girl Wash Your Face is a book that enlightens you about the 20 odd lies, people love telling themselves to procrastinate and hold back.  Buy Now Here : Girl, Wash Your Face   Year of Yes by Shonda Rimes Shonda Rimes is not an unknown name if you loved to binge-watch shows like ‘How To Get Away With Murder’ and ‘Grey’s Anatomy.’ The book is not a fancy tenement of tricks and tips for a better life. Instead, Rimes highlights the changes she witnessed after she said ‘YES’ for a year. It is a chronicle of episodes that only got better when she started nodding ‘YES’ for everything in life. Her...

Some of us are busy equating happiness to the past instances while many are awaiting the happiness in the future. Only a few of us are able to realize that happiness is right here, right now in the present moment. If you don't belong to this minority category, this article is a must-read for you. In-depth Realizations... The past is gone, and the future is yet to come. You know it too. But there is a reason why I am stating the obvious. I say so to make you realize that the past cannot be changed, likewise, the future cannot be controlled. You can only take care of the things happening NOW. It is only the present moment which always stays with you. Anyone and everyone might leave you except the present moment, which will always be with you until your last breath. If you agree to it, then allow yourself to enjoy its company and make it your best friend...How? Let us find out: The essence to feel: To enjoy the present moment, the first thing you need to know is that Feel is the essence of  Happiness. So the first thing you need to do is to revive the feel.  But it is not that easy as it sounds. It is because your thoughts are dominant over your ability to feel the present moment. You need to realize that Feel is inversely proportional to Thoughts. If you are thinking more, it means you are feeling less. And if you are doing so, the upcoming part of the article is not something you can afford to miss:  Look, I am not saying that thinking is not important. Of course, it's important. Unless you think, you will not be able to plan. Planning is important to get ready to face the upcoming situations. Also, your professional atmosphere requires thinking. So yes, positive and productive thinking is important. But you need to understand that it is not thinking but negative thinking, which needs to be avoided. To avoid negative thinking, I just want you to feel more and think less. The process of negative thinking... What is the current scenario? When you are always thinking, you are not realizing that simultaneously, you are less responsive to your sense organs. Let us explore how thinking is taking a toll on your sense organs. Eyes- You are not able to view the beauty of the nature surrounding you. Nose- You are unable to feel your blessed breaths, which itself is a form of meditation. Ears- You are unable to listen to the beautiful melodies...sounds of nature, delicate words by your loved ones, and most importantly, you are not listening to your inner voice. Tongue- You are not able to feel the food bites...You are more concerned thinking about what you are eating than to feel the fact that you are eating. Skin- You are unable to sense the gentle winds which want to nourish you, the beautiful touch of your loved ones, and many such things.  Do you know, just by sensing any of the sense organs completely, the feelings you experience can be as...

 No, you must never keep your sadness inside you. Express yourself out. Let people know that you are unhappy. Let them know that you are feeling isolated and depressed. Surely, you will feel a lot better and positive. Satirically, sometimes it may be the situation wherein people in front of whom you want to look happy could be the ones who are responsible for your sadness. Yes, there are situations when the reason for your desolation are the individuals who pretend to be yours; could be anyone from your family or friends. As a result, it becomes extremely tough to flood out your feelings towards them. Eventually, what you do is retain your painful emotions inside and hurt yourself even more. Remember, in any case; it is never advisable to preserve the sentiments inside you. Summon into your mind that it is even more important to express your true feelings towards those people, in particular. They are ones whom you talk to or meet them daily. You cannot escape from them. Keeping your emotions inside can ruin your life completely. Let the feelings flow out. However, sometimes it is only your misconceptions about a person which is responsible for your sadness. Shockingly, the person whom you are holding accountable for your sadness doesn’t even know about it. Don't you feel that the individual concerned must know about it? Yes, you owe him/her at least that much.  Sometimes, you might feel that your expressiveness might lose that person;  Rest assured, you will find yourself.  

You might face many situations in life where you know that you did well. Also, for that, you seek appreciation from others. You might deserve it, but sometimes you don't get it. It is quite disheartening. Friends, you need to comprehend that it is a cruel world out there. The sooner you realize it, the better it will be for you. Everyone is primarily concerned about themselves. All are busy exploring their ways to healthy and happy living. Nobody is interested in knowing your credentials and achievements. Whatmore, you are also one of them. Moreover, there is no harm in it because life is equally tough for everyone. Therefore, instead of criticizing them, start motivating yourself.  It’s a much-deserved reward after a long, tiring day to remind you that you did great today. It not only uplifts your mood but also enables you to push your limits. It creates a belief of satisfaction and self-confidence. A self -motivated person never looks outside for happiness, as the happiness resides inside them. It is vital to applaud for own-self because you only know how much effort has been put to make things possible. Self-motivation decorates your spirit with strength and self -empowerment. It uplifts you to do things with more vigor and confidence.  It helps you enjoy the success. It also helps you to accept failures, which pushes you to convert that failure into success. Therefore, always treat yourself when you do something good. Keep yourself boosted and motivated. Always keep the spirits high.    

Allow me to begin with a small composition of mine: Speak Speak speak... you speak SPEAK WITH AUTHORITY, SPEAK WITH CLARITY... make sure you get heard when you speak Irrespective of the language YOU SPEAK... as long as you have a voice, you speak don’t wary the criticisms and the questions ... as long as you are right, you speak Don’t worry about losing them, FOR THE SAKE OF FINDING YOURSELF, you speak. To spit out the negativity, for the sake of positivity... gather courage only once to speak on their face and never behind, as long as they are wrong, you speak FOR THE SAKE YOUR RESPECT AND ESTEEM... SPEAK SPEAK SPEAK... YOU SPEAK Hope you liked it! Let's jump right into the nitty-gritty of expressing: Expressing is an introduction of your true self to the outside world. Whatever you are inside, just exhibit it outside. What you are and whatever you feel, just express yourself. Never feel afraid of it. Always remember: “You were born to be real, not to be perfect.” - Claire Baker And this applies to everyone. When you have the freedom of expression, use it to your advantage. You are probably wondering: Why is expressing important? Expressing is your deliberate attempt to convert the negativity felt into positivity. In the world full of lies and betrayals, it is difficult to stop feeling negative. But you need to understand that feeling negative is not a problem.  The problem arises when you keep that negativity within you and do not express it out. But when you express out, you unburden yourself and flush out the negativity.  To maintain transparency between your physical and mental appearance. In case you don't know: There are two facets of your appearance- physical and mental. Expressing acts as a mirror between the two. It ensures that whatever you feel from inside, you present it outside. This way, you are true to yourself and to others. There is no retention of negative feelings inside you to attract other negative energies. You always ride high on yourself via expressing. When you express your true self to others, it means you value your ideas, thoughts, and beliefs. No wonder, expressing is one of the best ways to develop self-love. The quote above says it all... When you express, you expose yourself in front of others. You reveal your true identity to them. In the process, people might get hurt. Many people might not like you. They can call you rude, offensive and aggressive. They might misunderstand you. However, the ones who deserve to be in your life will understand you gradually. They will accept you the way you are. No wonder, these people will be less. But they will be the ones whom you will find by your side every time you need them. It's your identity, this is the way you always are, independent of the person, time and situation. Feel proud! Look: Being nude is always better than being naked. Sounds silly? It's not: Being nude is your choice. It is when you uncover yourself by yourself. It‘s your discretion to expose yourself to others. It is the transparency you...

How many times are you told by elders, friends and mentors to develop a positive attitude? Everyone instructs to do it, but only a few have directions on how to do it? What’s your attitude An attitude is a mindset developed over time, through experiences of resilience and observations about people and things.  It’s a predisposition to respond in a certain way, to both the known and unknown.  Simply, your attitude is your perspective towards life proceedings. It speaks a lot about you. Expressions ( often called as body language) is the indicator of your attitude towards people.  That doesn’t mean you should start dancing to them. Allow the real inside to roll your reel outside. And that’s why we need a positive attitude, to respond better in the now, so we unlock our desires, and dive into the flow of achieving them.  What's Positive Attitude? Positive attitude is Integrity —  honesty towards people and commitment to oneself.  The headspace where you are optimistic yet surrender to the present beyond control. It unleashes vibes of nothing to lose and experiences to gain, the approach that sets the spirit free to express your true self and unlock higher possibilities. Positive attitude is luxury you afford piercing comfort. It fosters with practice. Positive attitude is a mind zone where: people's thinking of you doesn't matter to you.  you trust instincts more than your compulsive thoughts. you believe everything will be ok no matter how hard it is right now. good for you includes good for people. there is self respect, no ego. success is just moving. lesson is the name of a failure. you believe no feeling is permanent, neither success nor failure, neither happiness nor sadness. beginning means almost done. you embrace negativity and bliss out to positivity. mind welcomes fear and accepts shortfalls gracefully. you are perseverant until you reach your goal. The headspace where your flowing presence entices everyone in the room is a positive attitude. Top Quotes on Attitude that Inspire “If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.” ― Frances Hodgson Burnett “Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you.” ― Walt Whitman “I do not believe in taking the right decision, I take a decision and make it right.” ― Muhammad Ali Jinnah “If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining - this is what you chose.” ― Joe Konrath “The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.” — Oprah Winfrey “The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.” — Louis E. Boone “An attitude of positive expectation is the mark of the superior personality.”  — Brian Tracy “When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” — Helen Keller 15 mindsets to develop a positive attitude Boils to Discipline when you Lack Motivation in Work Show up to work no matter how low you feel. Just showing up is half the job done. Begin your session with a 15 min exercise where you...