Emotional and Mental Health

Contentment is the realization of a beautiful soul. It is a feeling which resides within every individual, but only a few are able to explore it. It's completely different from materialistic happiness dependent on the outside world. Counting your blessings is the best way to reach there! A hungry person when smells the aroma of food, it is contentment. A mother while feeding her child sees a smile on his/her face, it is contentment. Father, when he sees his daughter in her wedding dress, is contentment. Contentment is not a thought. It's an unmatched feeling that awakens the lively buds of your soul. You cannot buy contentment; you earn it! When you see a flower, it's beauty and scent fills your heart with positivity. At times, you want to become that flower by aromatizing the life of others and spreading happiness. When one small act of yours brings a smile to someone’s face or a tear of joy in those eyes, that compassion within you is nothing but contentment. Even in your work sphere, the feeling derived from doing work that makes you happy is contentment. Sometimes you succeed, sometimes you fail. When you succeed, you feel a sense of joy, it is contentment. Even when you fail, a proud feeling must arise that you fulfilled the demand of that particular situation by giving your best. That feeling is nothing but contentment. However, you have to make sure that blissfulness derived out of contentment should never lead to complacency. It must always make you stress-free rather than making you carefree. It must push you further than to pull you back. Remember, standing water gets dirty quickly. So, never stop and keep flowing.             

Do you often engage with self-sabotaging thoughts? Do you feel a pang of unusual guilt during most of your life proceedings? Is feeling unworthy killing you from inside? Is fear of embarrassments squeezing your natural emotions? If any of this is customary with you, you often press the button of self-judgments. Which phase is this? The hard times when you find more reasons to self-criticize, less to appreciate yourself. Those scary nights when you either accuse yourself of all the wrong happening with people... or you blame people for all the bad in your life. The times when you want to stay alone, but could not find peace even in retreat. In fact, it sinks you deeper. Around all this, you could only suffer like a victim or feel lonely. I’m sure you are dying to get out of the rut! But before looking for an exit route, let me ask you: Have you ever met yourself wherever you are... wearing your own shoes? What I’m curious about is: You ever stayed with your shallow self in his slumps? Did you ever treat yourself like your best friend seeking advice? Or you just cannot take the self-beating, and you walk away ignorant, without facing yourself in the mirror of self-awareness? What’s stopping to meet the real you? Most likely your mind is overthinking ━ about people, situations... all in the outside world. The more you think, the more you judge them. And those judgments in the outside world are leading to judgments inside. That’s dangerous!! In those mind games, you rarely meet the real you. You just cripple... lost to the outside world. Everyone else controls your emotions, not you. You won't deny: Even if you encounter yourself in this phase, it’s a subconscious encounter, mostly soaked in negative self-talk. Everything during this time just shallows your existence, pushing you well within your unexplored boundaries. Wondering how to surpass this? Your revival setups with a small conscious self encounter Try a simple exercise: Give yourself that me time when you actually step into your own shoes to feel yourself. That zone where there is no one else... not even your mind, not your body. It’s just you talking to your soul! Remember the motive of this session is to feel light about yourself. Wait... before you start, you need to know: You just cannot jump right into your character and start feeling the depth of your soul straightway. I feel there is always a medium to reach there until you are that conscious. Well that medium could be your way of reaching out to yourself. It could be anything which rests you here, in the now, where you are detached outside and connected inside. Playing a sport or Connecting to music, Reading or by Writing, Meditating or by Yoga, Singing or by Dancing, Feeling blessed or Just by being yourself, That’s simply your choice!! Let’s do that... Arrange a small session You with Yourself every day at a fixed time. No one around, just you attending yourself. No thoughts landing anywhere...just sail with flowing time! The session where you try to be good to yourself like you try to be with people. No matter how: deep your insecurities, bad you are hurt, hard you are hit, down you are under... Make sure you host yourself with...

How did I slip into depression? I was super-sensitive to every emotion, irrespective positive or negative. I didn’t know where to draw the line.  Positive triggers like success, appreciation, love, took me all over to the moon. And the negative forces of failure, criticism, hatred, left deep bruises on my mind. Success made me feel like an invincible winner, while the failures, the biggest loser. My ability to feel emotions strongly was a boon in my lovely childhood and teenage days. That's because the situations back then triggered positive emotions. I didn't know the meaning of negativity, leave apart feeling it.  But after then, it was a complete turnaround. It was not a tragedy or a loss. Nothing major happened, but it was just a gradual accumulation of negative emotions, which turned my life upside down. It was such a slow process I never realized till I drowned under the depth of countless thoughts. What led to my downfall?  It was that vulnerable age I was standing in the outset of an uncertain future. I had no answers to my question- What Next? It was the early twenties —dreams and ambitions like every other, with an upbeat to pursue the best career. But every beat was falling flat. I was unable to find the best walk ahead. This dilemma lasted for unusually long, and I felt insecure for the first time. My alter ego sunk to the all-time low. I stopped loving myself, and others. Suddenly, everyone looked hostile. It was the phase when instances provoking negative emotions completely outnumbered the ones fuelling positive emotions.  I was losing my self-worth as the negative thoughts attacked my vulnerable mind in unison. And the hole was dug too deep for my mind to breathe, and it submerged under the countless thoughts.  I was down and under and finally fell prey to depression.  I consulted a doctor (precisely psychiatrist) who prescribed the conventional antidepressants. Those pills comforted my mind initially, but never did I realize that it was the dawn of worse things to follow. Alcohol lured my mind to elusive happiness The antidepressants, after a while, had stopped soothing. The freshness of mind had turned into an impossible dream. Not finding shoulders to lean on, I got lured by Alcohol’s friendship offer. It accompanied my lonely nights, promised me a fairyland every night but pushed me to the bleak reality every subsequent morning. I diluted alcohol for some time, but within no time, it started diluting my potent self. My poor mind was as helpless as a lamb in the hands of a butcher. It continued for 2 long years... the same hungover morning giving way to alcoholic nights. From a soulful being to a feelingless creature, I was losing everything. And if it would have continued, I couldn’t write this soulful note. A twist in the tale Alcohol could have been my last chapter but destiny had something else in the store. Jaundice infected my liver those days, giving way to the need for mindful eating and drinking. And yes, neither antidepressants nor alcohol was on the menu. The upcoming days were the...

 The world is full of negative energies and negative people around us. There are many instances which we see, hear, read and subsequently feel every day. The unnatural deaths due to deadly diseases, sudden accidents, brutal rapes, fatal crimes; moreover the betrayals, hypocrisy, jealousy and many more…you are bound to feel negative. But, this is one way of feeling it. Let us introduce ourselves to another way of looking at things. Despite all of the negativity happening around us, we also have all the reasons to feel content. We have a shelter to shed, food to eat, water to drink, money to spend. On top of that, WE HAVE TIME TO THINK AND TALK ABOUT NEGATIVE/ POSITIVE while most of the people do not have time to breathe freely. Compare yourself, but with the ones who can only dream of living your life. STOP COMPLAINING. You have all the right reasons to feel positive. Start feeling and enjoying happiness NOW. Last but not the least, follow compassion. Helping others and making others happy is a definite way to feel happy and positive.  

What defines your monotonous life? My boredom? Our generation’s boring monotony? A haunting tradition following since the X generation! It’s a pre-defined conventional journey — starts with a super-active child at home, an exuberant kid in school, an adventurous youth in college, and then? As soon as you enter the late twenties and early thirties, don’t you feel:We are puppets dancing off-beat to the tune of a monotonous life? You won’t disagree more or less we share a common story. We’ll talk a little about every phase starting teenage. The time before that does not qualify for scrutiny. We were happy souls then. The tender teenage is the age when most of us are on an exploring spree. It’s the most exciting phase when most of us are introduced to new experiences. The thrills of hormonal attraction, the adventure of bunking classes, the excitement of a new cellphone, fear of failures, sadness inflicting loss, and whatnot… Life events are not customary and that’s the best part of this time. Every moment awaits to capture a new experience. Moving to the next phase is the dawn of adulthood (the twenty-one's) when most of us go through a full range of overwhelming emotions, and gradually we prioritize and move forward with our choices and responses. But what next? Don’t you realize life stagnates thereafter? Yes… the majority of us stand at the doorstep of a monotonous life. ‘That’s because we turn into:spouses and parents in personal livesan employee or an employer in a professional careera mere reputation in the social environmentTill over and out.’ Please keep reading even if you haven’t reached this state, you are closer than you think! That’s because soon a customary routine takes over to define our life’s monotonous process until we final gasp. Most have compromised with it. But you don’t belong there, the reason you are here. Allow me to offer: 4 super effective ways to break the monotony of everyday life: Twist the thought process When you program your mind into a routine existence; your mind becomes a jailor and your soul a prisoner. Your life isn’t a beautiful exploration journey anymore. I may sound silly if I ask you: Do you wait for the holidays? Everyone does! Most of us work our asses off the entire week to enjoy on weekends. But does that mean you are eligible for happiness only on weekends? I don’t know much but I am sure about this: We cannot assign a particular date, time, and place for happiness. My friend; even happiness seems monotonous this way. What I feel we need this break every day. Any small conscious mind break is capable to break your routine existence. Listening to music, exercising, or maybe a long drive — any such monotony breaker not involving your mind is capable to rejuvenate your soul. And when you do that, you realize happiness does not involve the mind, it’s an essence of the soul. Did you know? Not only feeling happiness, but a mind rest daily can also raise its potency drastically. Here is a summary of recent research and thinking on the value of taking breaks. Start it now or else your holiday break remains a random...

Success and failure are brothers from different mothers. You try hard but the end result is not always in your favor. It is the time when people start judging you and even ask for justifications for your downfall or failure. Straight out, you need to appreciate the fact that your actions were inspired by none other than you. You did what you felt was right. People who can accept and understand it will agree to it. They will always back your decision. On the other hand, those who disagree; your hundreds of justifications will be in vain. Trust me, it is impossible to clarify your actions to everybody. People perceive what they want to as per their convenience and understanding. Moreover, why do you need to give justifications for your committed actions? A decision taken can have both the conditions possible. Either it will be right or it will be wrong. Be brave enough to take the responsibility of any condition. Why are you giving justifications to others and authorizing them to take a call on your decision? Also, the definition of right and wrong vary from person to person. Subsequently, neither it is possible nor it is your responsibility to make everyone happy. You don’t owe any justifications to anyone except to your time. Obliging others with your justifications is a big question on your self-belief and self-importance. Therefore, it is entirely your responsibility to take a stand for your actions. Always be loyal to your time as you cannot predict how much you have. Do things what the time demands and not what the people demand. It is the justification for your time, not people, which eases your life journey.      

Though it is common to face the feeling of sadness, grief, and sorrow at some point in our lives, depression is a serious condition which needs to be unmasked and knocked out. Most of us often confuse between sadness and Depression. And therefore, It is imperative to know the differences and take appropriate measures. 14 differences between sadness and depression  The foremost difference between sadness and depression is that sadness is a temporary feeling. On the other hand, the feeling of depression is over an extended period, can last even for a lifetime. Sadness is an emotional pain which is a reaction to situations. The reasons for sadness are apparent. It could be linked to the death of a closed one, financial losses, failures, homesickness, breakups, fight with the best friend, and so on... Depression is a serious medical illness where one is sad about everything. A situation where everything is fine but the person still feels miserable. Shockingly, there is no apparent reason for depression. Yes, you read it right. A person can feel depressed for no reason.  A sad person craves for the moments once rejoiced; they miss the activities which used to excite them. In case of a depressed person, nothing seems to pull their interest, not even the things which used to give them pleasure earlier...  A sad person relates their sadness only to the causes of sadness. They do not trigger their overthinking mode. The intensity of pain is confined to the reasons for sadness. A depressed person is already hurt. And so, they get affected by petty issues beyond boundaries. They overthink about it. In the process, find self-hurting reasons which have no relevance to the primary cause. As a result, the intensity of pain is unbearable. Feel is the essence of happiness. When a person is sad, he/she doesn’t lose the ability to feel. With depression, the person loses the ability to feel. They feel less and think more. In extreme stages of depression, the feel quotient is almost dead, and the person stops getting affected by anything and everything happening around. When a person feels sad, the motive in their life never subsides. He/She does not give up on their dreams, passion, goals, and ambitions.  A person feeling depressed does not have aims and aspirations. They have no purpose in life. They are unaware of where their life is leading to. A sad person follows the routinary sleep and diet patterns. Even if the pattern gets disturbed, it is for a short time span. In case of a depressed person, it lasts way longer than that... the person may become an insomniac or sleep all day…With diet, either they don’t eat at all or keep munching on abnormal quantities at abnormal timings.  With sadness, one does not feel tired and fatigue the whole day, every day. The reasons can be attributed to the causes of sadness. With depression, one does not feel getting out of the bed the entire day, every day. On top of that, the cause of tiredness and fatigue can be linked to literally nothing. Yes, read it right!!! When a person has reasons to feel sad, he will be sad....

Do you fear friends or colleagues will find out you are not as worthy as they think? Or you feel your success (irrespective big or small) was a fluke and people will soon find out you are a fraud? Don't worry it's the Impostor Syndrome where you feel like a fraudulent, a pretender, a hoaxer (which you are not). Approximately 70 percent of people will experience at least one episode of impostor syndrome in their lives. What's Impostor Syndrome? Why is it vicious? Often spelled as Imposter, feeling an Impostor is incompetence to deal with your imperfections and perform at the highest standards you set for yourself. It’s like riding high on egomania while enjoying success and then sliding down to fear of being called a cheater or a fraud. You feel like a loser irrespective how successful you are. It makes you incapable to focus on your current work, living in obscurity, not opening up to new opportunities. Rewards and Recognition do more harm than good where you feel you cannot justify your credentials in the upcoming project, and you fear people will know about your incompetence. The feeling of an Impostor kills creativity where you are constantly self-judging. You are too hard on yourself overthinking about people’s opinion of you.  It retracts you from the present moment, discharging the concentration, denting your flow, and jolts your personal and professional growth.  The good news is that you are not alone! Celebrity quotes on Impostor Syndrome: When I was younger, I just did it. I just acted. It was just there. So now when I receive recognition for my acting, I feel incredibly uncomfortable. I tend to turn in on myself. I feel like an impostor. It was just something I did. —Emma Watson    Sometimes I wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot, and I think, I can’t do this. I’m a fraud. —Kate Winslet   No matter what we've done, there comes a point where you think, 'How did I get here? When are they going to discover that I am, in fact, a fraud and take everything away from me? —Tom Hanks     I have written eleven books, but each time I think, 'uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out. —Maya Angelou  My Encounter with Impostor Syndrome  Insightful publications like Lifehack, Pick the Brain, Purpose fairy, Dumb Little Man published my articles. I received accolades for these, including some of my works published on my blog. Why am I bragging? The critic appreciation prod to deliver more, as I began expecting too much out of myself. I started fearing people’s eyes, thinking about them, all of it abstaining from workflow, diminishing my quality of work, questioning my talent and abilities. I could not write, unable to get rid of the perfectionist inside me self-judging constantly. My creativity fired many times, soon to nosedive into a polluted pool of uncertainties. I could not do love doing most — Expressing my thoughts and emotions. And that led to Impostor Syndrome where there were dilemmas and ambiguity, causing fear and my lower self cried: People will...

Morals are the basic understandings, values, and beliefs of a particular person or a group or a culture that defines how we should live our life. Sometimes, these are written or expressed in books; sometimes these are words of great people whom we believe.   Morals are universal teachings that we try to practice every day. Morals are ideal in themselves. They help us in choosing a response to a particular situation. Ideally, they teach the concept of right and wrong. Now, when a person believes in these teachings or values and acts accordingly in his day to day life, then these beliefs become a trait of that person. For instance, one should be loyal, is a belief. Loyalty becomes the character of that person. Therefore, we must summon into minds that we build our character on the ideas of our morals. Building a morale is a continuous process, which takes time. It is not a one-day phenomenon. A person's upbringing also plays a dominant role in the cultivation of values and morals. Therefore, it also becomes the responsibility of the parents to nurture their child well. Also, guide them to follow the right path.

When people don't fulfill your expectations, you get hurt. Your undue expectation from people has become one big reason to feel negative.  Therefore, it is imperative to find out why these expectations and from whom are these expectations? Why do you expect and from whom do you expect? In today’s world, you expect from people because you want them to ‘Return the favor back.’ It is an obligation you anticipate from others in exchange for the good things you assume you did for them. It is the reason why you expect a reciprocation. Quickly, you need to understand that if you are counting on every acquaintance to fulfill your expectations, the matter of fact is that you are unreasonable and foolish. Supremely, your expectations could be from the ones whom you love, who are important to you. It might be from the people you care for, whom you respect, the ones with whom you share a strong bond and an active connection. Let's say, people are fulfilling every expectation of yours. But, what we need to comprehend is that everything is perfectly fine until people keep responding as per your expectations. The question is how long you will keep on getting your expectations fulfilled by others? How long will others carry the burden of meeting your expectations? The never-ending expectation process: Be mindful of the fact that the fulfillment of one expectation leads to the urge of the other. Gradually, it leads to an endless flow and to tell the truth, the chain breaks down one day. Yes, your feelings get hurt one day. Sometimes, the volume of that pain soars high to an extent where you tend to shift your perception of people who belong to you. By and by, you even form a negative opinion about those people. You begin to judge those people based on that particular situation in which they did not raise up to your expectation. You start to forget the positives associated with them. In due process, you don’t realize the value of that person in your spirits before this particular incident. And eventually, you lose that person.  Let me bombard a few questions on you... If you are demanding the ideal condition out of a person, are you an ideal person to demand it? How will you feel when you are on the other side of the table? Are you not wrong on your part if you are expecting people to respond according to you? Are you not judging people calling them wrong without knowing about their problems and situations? Maybe, they could have been in their world of problems when you were expecting from them. Or maybe they are the ones dwelling in their own aura and you are not able to perceive it. Sorry for being brutally honest but when you start putting conditions on expectations from others, you are wrong. Put it to yourself and ask yourself how do you feel about those people who impose their expectations on you? And when you are not able to meet their expectations, how do you feel about those judgemental...