The inevitable process
We all are distinct individuals. We look different, think different. We respond to a given situation differently. We all have unique personal, social and professional background. Our interests, strengths, weaknesses, core competencies are all varied and diversified. We all are unique in our ways. Undoubtedly, most of us haven’t met in person and do not know one another personally. However, we all have someone very familiar around us. He is the one who clings on each of us individually and characteristically. May I present you, our omnipresent friend ‘STRESS.’ I know I am personifying ‘Stress’ but to connect well with this state of mind, pause and think; ‘doesn’t “it”, rather “he” seem like our best friend?’
You might have got a hint….with a realization.
I know it is not easy to admit, but it is a venomous truth. We shall try to face it, accept it and seek solutions. Most of us might also be wondering that how can we be friends with stress, let alone being best of friends. We all want to keep stress away from our lives, but how many of us have succeeded in doing so? Well, I don’t think this question needs to be answered.
Fine, let us try to check the authentication level of our affinity with stress.
Qualities of our best friend:
We all are very well aware of the qualities of a best friend. Let us try to figure out that does he (Stress) has the same qualities that our best friends have?
- The first and the foremost quality best friends have is that they are trustworthy. Come what may, they will never leave you. Rest assured, our relationship with stress is also very healthy and sustainable. Sometimes, it even lasts for a lifetime.
- The second quality we find in our best friends is that they never let us feel lonely and alone. Stress again meets and fulfills this promise. No matter whatever the situations most of us are in, stress accompanies us anywhere and everywhere. In fact, many of his friends like anxiety, nervous tension, worry, fear, and impatience also join the party. I am sure we don’t like them, but how can we say no to the friends of our best friend.
- Ok, let us check out the following quality. Whenever we are stuck in panic and dreaded situations, we want our best friends to be with us. Ta-da….here he comes, just like a jinni. The only difference is that here we don’t have to rub the Magical Lamp. Stress always accompanies us when we get stuck in these situations.
- Final and the most liked about quality we observe in our best friends is that even if they are not physically present with us, they are always connected with us mentally. And you know what, stress entirely bestows this quality. You can be cent percent sure about it. In fact, stress is one step ahead of all of them. He is capable enough to affect our physical and the mental health both at the same time.
So friends, stress always fully justifies his friendship. He always treats us as our best friends. And we consciously or subconsciously reciprocate the same level of friendship back to him. After all, he stays with us like a best friend, right?
I know it is getting interesting. You can spare a few more minutes. Allow me to explain it to you that what kind of a person we can relate stress too, with the help of a real-life illustration.
A real-life illustration:
Once there was a boy named Peter, who was in some need of money. There were not many options for him to explore but he needed the money instantly.He was feeling helpless. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, a boy named Clarke came to him and offered him help. Clarke was ready to lend money to Peter. “Why is he helping me?” Peter thought. I hardly know him. I am just an acquaintance to him”. Peter was getting inquisitive. Nevertheless, all these questions soon got overpowered by the fact that Clarke was helping him in his tough times.
Before this, Clarke was only an acquaintance to Peter. But after taking help from him, Peter’s thoughts about Clarke changed dramatically and instantly. Clarke was no less than the best friend to Peter. Yes, and why not? After all, Clarke consoled him and gave his shoulders to Peter to lean on. On top of that, Clarke even convinced to borrow money for him and assured that he would never ask for the money again. Clarke knew that Peter was a very soft target for him at that moment and was most vulnerable. Shockingly, no one knew the mala fide intentions of Clarke. Ultimately, Peter got trapped by Clarke. Clarke lent money because he wanted Peter to be indebted to him so that he could take undue advantages of Peter as and when required. Peter, in oblivion, was unable to evaluate the amount of repayment he now owed to Clarke. The monetary refund was far beyond his capacity to offset. Peter’s inability to repay back monetarily always made him feel beholden and duty bound to Clarke.
Believe me; there is not much difference between friends like Clarke and Stress. He is that friend, who lends us money purposely. His motive is to make us intensely bonded with him to an extent where it becomes tough to set ourselves free. Moreover, he is fully aware how to use it to his advantage. Remember, we never opt for his friendship by choice. We always wish to break this relationship. Nevertheless, we are not able to do so because he is controller and dominant partner in this relationship.
I firmly believe that this short story is comprehensive enough to evaluate what kind of our best friend Stress is.
Remeber, Stress is lifeless without us. He moves around everywhere in search of vulnerable butts. Remember, we don’t owe him anything. We are just his soft targets. Moreover, he knows it very well who the targeted individuals are.
Break the shackles. We must throw this pretender out of our lives and get liberated. Apparently, he will feel bad but have we ever tried to analyze how is he killing us inside? Yes, stress is the cause of most of the problems we are facing. In fact, the problem is not at all a problem until we attach stress to it.
We know these malicious friends would keep knocking our doors but why not wave them goodbye with a smile.
Amanpreet Singh is the founder of Happy Realization. From the negatives of depression to the positives of meditation, he loves expressing his experiences and the practical life lessons which he calls his Happy Realizations. He is a guest blogger in esteemed publications like Lifehack, Pick the Brain and Dumb Little Man.