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I am dying at 35 but this is not what is hurting me. What’s painful is that when I look back, I don’t recall 35 memories to cherish!!! The journey has not been worth remembering. I am not saying I was sad throughout my life, but yes, I always struggled to feel happy. Never had I felt what I realize now, which is the difference between real happiness and materialistic happiness.  And the irony is when I have realized it, I cannot be happy. I am dying and practically, I cannot choose happiness. I can only miss happiness. But at least you can... choose it now. You might be curious to know what happened suddenly that my life turned upside down? I am literally into tears to pen it down but I will, just to make you realize that today is my turn, likewise, it can be yours tomorrow. And I don’t want you to die like me, just like that. Well... nothing much to tell because it was all good a week back. Just a slight pain in my stomach which led to a couple to tests. Huh... to find what? The final stage of liver cancer with a piece of news... the news that I have a few months, weeks or maybe days left. Hard to live with the fact that I am dying anytime soon. But wait a minute, is this something new I got to know? Is it really news that I might die soon? Was I not aware of it or rather are ‘we’ not aware that we‘ll die one day? I am sure even you know about this inevitable truth but there is a difference between you knowing and me knowing it... The difference is that I can feel it now but I’m not sure you can!!! Sorry to say this but maybe you die before me, trust me it is possible. I may sound weird so let me back it with a testimony. About a month back, I heard the shocking news that a 40-year-old man from my vicinity has been diagnosed with a final stage brain tumor and he does not have much time left. I know him personally and this news left me shattered. I remember I was saying to my wife that 40 is not an age to die. How could be God so cruel? Ha... never dared to imagine that I am dying before him in my thirties. Now I am sure you got a pinch of my taste! This is how unpredictable life is. I close my eyes at night more in fear whether they would open to see a morning... sometimes I wonder what is a bigger challenge? To die gracefully or to live gracefully? Because suddenly I see my definition of challenges transforming.   I could sense the definition of my success changing, which was once to earn bread, and what is now to earn breaths. I could feel a change in my attitude from ‘let it come’ some time back to ‘let it go’ today. I could sense the perception of my future...

And here she begins... You opted to grow up but I opted to remain a child... I preferred to stay the same but you loved the change. You know why? Because the change was for your good, not mine. I can understand that you were ambitious enough to lash onto every opportunity but how could you when the foundation of it was my failure? You did not realize that your success ladder was not wide enough that we climbed together. But you never looked back to check whether I was behind.  You know... I was all ears in your struggling times. I made you run when you could not stand. I gave you a purpose to fight when you were on the brink of losing. I literally gave you life when you were on the verge of a suicide. Now how could you glow your candle without realizing that it was my wax which is burning? How could you move on leaving me behind? How could you take a stride when either of your shoes was not mine? How did you clap when either of your hands was not mine? I know you are not good at expressing love but then how were you so good at expressing the bitterness? You doubted my reciprocation emphasizing that I changed. You said I don’t love you anymore... You were not completely wrong because you didn’t deserve it anymore. Yes, both of us wanted a bigger house, but it is you who forgot that... The bigger the house, The longer The distance between the rooms. You forgot that the foundation of a healthy relationship is respect, and not always love!!! You cursed my anger and frustration but never realized it was my pain shouting at you.  You said you don’t see a smile; I say you didn’t see my tears... You called me possessive and insecure but I say it was love. You spoke to get heard but about my words...they sought attention, but your ears called them trespassers. I know you found my fault and I found yours... And maybe neither of us was wrong and the situation was guilty. But you know what, you were never ready to be tested in those situations.  No, you were not a liar either but the problem was you were brutally honest. I took pride in calling you ‘my man’ but you turned out to be more of a man with fewer emotions. I am sure you never cheated on me with other women but does that make you loyal? Sorry I deny because you stopped looking at me either. I’m sure you never slept with other women but why did you stop sleeping with me? It was our mutual decision that I conceive. The decision which once looked beautiful seems ugly now. You know why? Because I am the one who has to live with that decision, not you. Yes, I am still facing the wrath to conceive that decision. Abortion was your solution, but it was ‘your solution to your insecurities.’ If you ask me which you never did, it was a heinous crime. Society... we never cared about, but I never realized that...

Yes, I am turning 30 in a week. Don’t know how to perceive it. Unable to understand whether to feel happy or to feel sad... Don’t know whether it is encouraging or disheartening? Don’t know whether to celebrate or to cry? Just not able to sink in the feeling of entering the “club 30”. It’s because most teenagers want to be called as adults, not children. For that, they eagerly wait to leave the teenage and enter the world of the twenties. Surprisingly, the ones in their thirties also want to relive their twenties. So you see... the period of the twenties is one golden and an adventurous phase sought not only by the teenagers but also by the ones in their thirties. And the same is happening to me. Leaving my twenties is quite a heavy feeling. This new beginning marks the end of a tipsy-topsy yet worth-remembering decade.  Most of us fear the new and I am no different. I am apprehensive about it!!! But what is the reason behind it, I’m not able to figure out. Is that the beautiful memories of my twenties or the feel of worthlessness reaching the thirties? I have money, I have a beautiful family, I am working fine, both my physical and the mental appearance is fine, I have everything a person can ask for, but I am just not up for it. Don’t know what is wrong with me? What am I fearing, what do I want, why am I apprehensive...Why am I not able to take pride in turning 30? What is bothering me?  Locks without keys... questions without answers. Is it the professional lag I wish to destroy or is the entertainment I shall miss on turning 30? Well, I guess it is a mixture of both. But the ironical part is that in both the conditions, I don’t want to leave this phase. I have confessions to make both personally and professionally. Let’s find out the particular reasons behind my uncertainties... If you ask about my professional sphere... Maybe, the reason I am reluctant to reach the 30 is I could have done better with the phase of the twenties. And I still have a lot to achieve before I reach this stage. I feel I lag in achieving my goals. Sometimes, I even feel like a loser. When I look back, I don’t recall a beautiful past. Life has not been a fairy tale for me even after having everything a man needs to be happy. If I die a natural death which I suppose is 60, half of my life is over. But I still don’t know where my life is leading to. Read in a study somewhere that people get prone to a heart attack after they reach 30.  Now see, even studies indicate that my end is near. Hahaha… seriously these things have tickled my mind. You know why? Because if I die today, what will the people remember me for? Have I done anything worth remembering? Wow… some serious questions, huh?  If you ask about my personal sphere... I cannot look at the beautiful girls, don’t...

Did you ever fall in love?  If you have, just keep reading and you will once again... but this time with none other than oneself. If not love, maybe you felt an infatuation towards somebody at some time.  A mere physical attraction! Not even that? Please close this screen and get your hormones checked first. Haha... I am sure you don’t belong here.   Love beyond judgmental mind   In today’s glamorama, our attention catches someone now and then. In fact, many love stories geminate on attraction. But that's just a seed.   When you truly love someone, the magical feeling is unmatched crossing all the barriers of judgment. You don’t play mind games when you are in love, know that person inside out. You accept them gracefully without any concern about their physical or mental appearance. Let us connect to some feelings when you are in love with somebody. 12 qualities when you are in love Balancing out others' weaknesses No one is perfect. Not only you appreciate their strengths but also try to cover up their weaknesses. Forgiveness Humans commit mistakes, and you accept that. You may fight with the person whom you love, land in arguments but eventually, you forgive him/her. Not holding back to apologize This is difficult otherwise but not in the case of love where there is no room for ego. It's because you value your relationship more than your ego. Expressing Love Now and then, you express your love to them in your peculiar way. You don’t hold back in making them feel special.   Make them realize when they are wrong Not only you admire their right, but also try to make them realize their egoistic behaviors in person, not openly   Respect Differences Everyone is an exclusive package. You might have nothing in common but maybe this is what you like about them. Never insult them When you love them, you never make fun of them, never embarrass them. You never hurt their sentiments intentionally. Respect and Trust Them You respect them more than you love them. You trust them more than anyone else. The reason is you know that respect and trust are strong foundations of a healthy love relationship.  Motivate and Encourage Not only you cherish their moments of success with them, but also try to motivate and cheer them up in their failures. No Comparison You don’t compare any attributes of your loved ones with others, be it good or bad. You love them the way they are and you never want to change their uniqueness. Always around in there tough times Life is all about peaks and valleys. And you never leave their hand in their darkest of phases. Flowing love Your love for that person never fades with passing time and it is not situational. It blossoms and matures beautifully. I am sure you could relate to many of these feelings if you have ever been in love. But let me raise a question on your behalf. Aren’t we talking about the fortunate ideal relationships?   Heartfelt curiosities Dear friend, even if your infatuation transpired into love, does it guarantee the same reciprocation from the one you love? What about those one-sided love and those broken trusts? You cannot ignore those. In fact needs more attention as the way people get affected.   You see, the qualities which we...

Let us define passion in the first place...  Passion could be anything which you love to do, which stays with you every moment till your last breath. The things which you feel from within, leading to happiness is your passion. Dedicating long continuous hours to passion is something which you are not forced upon. It is your choice. Pursuing passion is not a work-load, it's recreation. It does not tire you but energizes you. According to Wikipedia, "Passion is a feeling of intense enthusiasm towards or compelling desire for someone or something." One could be passionate about anything; singing, dancing, reading, playing any sport, playing an instrument, gyming, photography, painting, cooking, and so on... The feeling of effortlessly following the passion is magical and unmatched. Lucky they are who could discover their passion; Luckier are the ones who get an opportunity to pursue it. Another face of passion... There are many things which you can do passionately, but it does not involve money. Following compassion passionately, loving someone passionately, devotion to God are a few examples. But in this post, I am referring to the passion-oriented careers, the fields you are relying upon for your source of bread. The path of pursuing your passion: Often, hobbies lead to passion. Remember, hobbies are the things you like to do while passion involves things you love to do. Yes, it might sound similar but there is a huge difference between the two. The feeling associated with passion is quite intense compared to enjoying a hobby. How? Let us try to dig deep into it. Reading, writing, singing, dancing, cooking, playing, painting, are some of the hobbies. Say, playing cricket is your hobby. But unless you are a good cricketer and you dedicate your full time and potency to improve and adapt, it cannot be called your passion. Playing it as a favorite pass time cannot turn you into a successful cricketer unless you follow it passionately. Therefore, it's important not to hope for the outcome of a passion just by enjoying a hobby. The obstacles in the passion-driven journey... There is no problem if you are passionate in conventional fields. What I mean is, if you want to become an engineer, doctor, lawyer or you want to pursue your family business, it is all fine. But the path of the passion-driven journey can be extremely tough if you want to become a writer, singer, actor, model, photographer, footballer, painter dancer, comedian and the like. In such domains, only finding passion never means you will be able to pursue it and most importantly, complete the passion-driven journey. Do you know why? It is because of the 5 major hindrances: 1. Non-Acceptance Yes, you read it right, 'Non-Acceptance.' These fields are still struggling to find acceptance in the first place. In most of the countries especially Asian countries, you just can't do what you want to do without the acceptance of two sections of people -'Parents and Society.' Hard to believe but it is a fact. And this is why you have to go out of the way to...

Am I right or am I wrong? This question comes to your mind before and after any action. Let us try to find an answer. Dear friend, you have your right-wrong beliefs in different spheres- personal, professional, political, economic and so on. But a person’s life mainly revolves around two spheres-personal and professional. Involving these two spheres, let us take the help of illustrations to unlock the right and wrong beliefs. You can have the right and wrong beliefs about: Situations People Let us take a situation-based instance from the personal sphere... If I ask you... Is God right or wrong? This question sounds weird, but trust me it’s logical. Please answer it… Did you feel that your answer is biased to your current situation? Confused? Let me clear this out for you.  Suppose, your today is a fairytale with happiness all around. No wonder, for you, God is absolutely right! God forbid but assume the other side… You surfaced a sudden loss or a failure. Something shattered your life and there’s sadness all around. If I ask you the same question, God will be wrong. Yes, it happens with almost every individual. Your answer today is dependent on your current situation. You felt it, right? And this happens with most of us. The spontaneity to react to a situation bypasses the concepts of right and wrong.  Let us take the example of people in your professional sphere... If I ask you whether your boss is right or wrong? Your answer will be based on the current tuning with him. The day when he applauds you or offers you incentives or talks about your salary raise, he is right. But the day when he screams at you or overburdens you with work, the same boss is wrong.  The same thinking is applicable when you are the boss...The day you see your employee devoting extra time to work, cracking a deal, achieving targets, he is right... and when he takes long leaves, asks for a salary hike, commits mistakes, he is wrong. One observation drawn is you adjust your right and wrong as per time and situation you are in... Let us find out whether this adjustment is justified… Here’s the interesting part... You are just another person who makes a choice as per your convenience of time and situation. Likewise, others are doing it. And there is nothing wrong with it. My dear friend, you are just a slave to our priorities. Your right and wrong are molded as per time and situation you in. It is all about your priorities and you need not feel sorry for the same. It is the practicality of the real world. And there is nothing much you can change about it. So let us stop judging people and situations, and stop labeling them as right or wrong... An eye opener... When your life is loaded with materialistic options, you might feel that thinking always about the money is wrong. But God forbid, when you cannot fulfill your necessities of life, all you want is money. Now tell me whether you are right or wrong? Will you judge yourself now? I am sure you’ll not… Time for in-depth realizations!!! You...

First of all, let us define self-control: According to Vocabulary.com, "Self-control is the quality that allows you to stop yourself from doing things you want to do but that might not be in your best interest." My dear friend, today’s world is full of alluring mediums where you fall prey to the materialistic forces for momentary happiness. Resisting the temptation has become extremely difficult.  Getting carried away to these tempting drives might give you instant happiness and success. It is the reason why you begin to lose your self-control and commit yourself to these choices. But is the success and happiness derived by committing to it real? Does it really last for a lifetime? Let us find out... Why is Self-Control Important? Straight out, there are no shortcuts to success, and happiness derived after fulfilling the never-ending desires is short-lived. You got the reason why is it short-lived. It is because those desires are never-ending. The fulfillment of one just makes making way for the other, resulting in a never-ending vicious flow. This momentary happiness is soon followed by regret. And trust me, this regret adversely affects the self-love. And if continued further, it may even lead to self-harming thoughts. It is immensely important to stay away from these drives. And this is why your self-control has a vital role to play. The stronger your self-control, the less you fall prey to the luring drives.  A few daily-life practical examples where self-control is important... Student, self-control is resisting the temptation of going to your best friend's birthday celebration today when he/she has a difficult exam tomorrow. Ice-cream lover, self-control is resisting the temptation of eating it when you are on a fitness diet. Married man, self-control is resisting the temptation of getting carried by the physical beauty of another woman. Sugar patient, self-control is resisting the temptation of sweets and desserts. Parent, self-control is resisting the temptation of raising hands on your child when he/she commits a mistake. Stressed person, self-control is resisting the temptation of alcohol, which is an elusive stress buster. Monetary-struggler, self-control is resisting the temptation to earn quick money by unethical means like gambling or theft. Failure, self-control is the resisting the temptation of giving up. I am sure you can relate to any of these instances.How is Self-Control Connected to Self-Esteem? In such a competitive and stressful environment where every man is for themselves, self-esteem has become quite essential. And it is your self-control, which is responsible for your boosted self-esteem. If you keep falling prey to the alluring mediums, you will never be able to ride high on your self-esteem. Ultimately, you shall keep on denying the internal happiness. On the contrary, you just need one big situation where you resist yourself to the alluring temptation via self-control. Then off you go, your self-esteem and self-love get an automatic boost. And this boost acts as a solid base to resist the upcoming temptations. Let us find out how this entire process works... AN INDIVIDUAL – SELF-CONTROL – CHARACTER BUILDING  – AVOIDANCE OF MATERIALISTIC TEMPTATIONS – HIGH SELF-ESTEEM –  REAL HAPPINESS. First and foremost, self-control has to be your initiation to do the...

Before evaluating the differences, let's find out the similarity between both the attitude.  Did you notice that both the attitude have four consecutive letters in common-'LOSE'? You know what does it mean? It means that both the attitude(loser/nothing to lose) are provoked by a loss. Now, there are two possible conditions involving a loss.  You are on the verge of losing. You have already lost. Subsequently, when you encounter any of the above-mentioned situations,  it provokes either a 'nothing to lose' attitude or you develop a 'loser attitude'.   An example involving sports where you are on the verge of losing... Two players are playing a game of squash inside two different courts.  The game is of 5 sets. Both the players lose the first two sets. Obviously, the recovery seems extremely difficult hereon. Now, let us try to compare and analyze their respective attitude where one develops a loser attitude while the other develops a nothing to lose attitude.  The one with the ‘loser attitude:’ After losing the first two sets out of five, the person with a negative mindset starts considering himself as a loser even before the result of the game. It evokes fear inside him and he begins saying to himself that he cannot win from this particular game-situation. Eventually, he surrenders to a situation and showcases a ‘loser attitude’ in the subsequent game-set. This attitude fails to deliver miserably, no need to mention the outcome. The one with the ‘nothing to lose attitude.’   A person with a positive frame of mind sees things differently. After losing the first two sets, he sets himself free. Even he starts considering himself as a loser but with a different mindset. As soon as he accepts his loss, he starts seeing it as a different ball game altogether. It evokes a fearless attitude within him as he is already considering himself as a loser. He starts feeling that he cannot go down anymore and plays the rest of the game carefree and stress-free. Trust me, most of the times he is able to turn the tables around from nowhere, and an evident lose turns out to be a surprising victory. Let us consider a monetary example where the loss has already occurred: Two businessmen suffered a huge financial loss in their respective trades. The one with a loser attitude: The person with the loser attitude starts feeling embarrassed and ashamed. He is not able to sink that loss inside his mind. As a result, it never lets him overcome that loss or defeat. That fear of losing refrains him from starting again. As a result, he always considers himself a loser.  The one with a nothing to lose attitude: There is the other businessman who considers it as an opportunity, the opportunity to start from scratch, where he cannot go down beyond it. This attitude allows him to realize his mistakes so that he never repeats it again. Time for some Happy Realizations!!! Friends, we all lose on something at some point in time.  But what makes us a loser or winner depends...

This article is going to be an interesting one... To begin with, let me give you an insight into why is it essential to revive the feel... Feel is the essence of happiness. Feelings are the best judge to distinguish between the things you like and which you don’t. Even you must have experienced that time falls short while doing anything you enjoy. It is because of the involvement of feel in your work. On the contrary, the time slowly limps while doing anything you don't enjoy. Again, it is because the sincere feel to perform it is missing. Therefore, you must try to do things you feel to do. When you feel it, you will be able to love it. Subsequently, when you do things which you love, you will be able to enjoy it. When you enjoy it, you give it a chance to turn it into your passion. My dear friend, if you do anything passionately, it infuses a powerful self-belief you. Finally, things start happening in your favor. A  few heartfelt realizations... Your work must make you happy. Summon into minds that if your work is not making you happy, there is a lot to ponder upon. If your work is not energizing you, something is not right. Straight out, if your work is tiring you, IT IS NOT YOUR WORK. Be mindful of the fact that excellence in any field requires the feel to do and perform. Feel releases an active energy to perform a task dedicatedly. You can say that the feel associated with your works is the mantra of success. By now, I am sure you must be realized that why is it important to do whatever you feel. Better said than done, is it so easy? Is life so lenient on us?  Let's find out... The Reverse formula ... We can say that it is the ideal condition we were talking about. Everyone does not get the opportunity to pursue their passion and follow their dreams. Time and Situations are not always perfect where you do things according to your preferences and choices. Not even that, sometimes you are even forced to do things which you don’t feel to do. Factors like upbringing, surrounding social environment, situations of every individual are different and classified. Everyone does not get an opportunity to do whatever they feel. Some compromise for their loved ones and some compromise because they don't have any loved ones. And this is what life is all about...Adjustments. Many people have to adjust and adapt themselves as per time and situation. There are many individuals who have to comply with circumstances to earn bread without any other option available. No wonder, life is unpredictable with twists and turns. We don’t always get an opportunity to set the dancing tune for ourselves. Therefore, it is essential for us to take things positively with the right attitude. And this is when the reverse formula works... When you can't do whatever you feel, start feeling whatever you do... TIME FOR SOME HAPPY REALIZATIONS: Crying over your plight or surrendering to an unfavorable situation is...