We might be one of those who confuse between Self respect the virtue and Ego the vice.
The reason is simple:
Both infuse a sense of pride.
What I feel is ego and self respect are the two extremes of a single line. Unlocking the mystery is vital.
Before moving to the differences, let us address the two — Ego and Self Respect.
Table of Contents
Definitions of Ego and Self Respect
Ego is negative. It is an emerging belief arising from deliberate comparison of oneself with others.
We compare ourselves with both the higher and lower people we consider in terms of money, power, authority, appearance, anything. Either we feel superior or we get hurt.
Self respect is positive. There is a deeper consciousness where we commit only to actions that don’t cause shame while doing it or afterward.
A heightened state when there’s self-acceptance regardless of possessions and identities.
I love this citation:
“There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. ‘Good pride’ represents our dignity and self-respect. ‘Bad pride’ is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.”
—John C. Maxwell
It wonderfully defines the two often confused Ego and Self Respect.
Let us jump right into the differences:
15 differences between Ego and Self respect
Ego– We bow down to the ones we consider superior to us, and bully/ignore the ones inferior in our adulterated minds.
Self Respect– There’s a positive attitude where we love everyone including ourselves.
Ego– Me only me… there’s only self-interest even at the cost of hurting others. What’s worse, we are unconscious of it most times.
Self Respect– We, we, or after you… We take care of everyone’s sentiments, never hurting anyone intentionally. Same time making sure our voice is heard.
Ego– We are in constant comparison and competition with others. We desire to beat them anyhow.
Self Respect– We don’t compare ourselves to others. We aspire to touch our deeper selves.
Ego– We deliberately choose the wrong means, opt for shortcuts, be manipulative just to satisfy our ego.
Self Respect– Our respect for ourselves is supreme which refrains from committing to the wrong. It encourages to choose difficult paths, the tough responses.
Ego– We fear the outside world — people and situations. The reason is simple: Self-conceit is hollow, so we fear any change from the monotony could expose our nudity as naked.
Self Respect– We fear no one as there’s nothing to hide. We welcome the new through a positive attitude and self-belief.
Ego– It dwells on materialistic achievements and alluring drives. We buy an expensive mobile or a new car, it fuels our ego. We feel superior to others. But when we lose money or power, our ego is shattered. There’s always dependency for happiness.
Self Respect– It is an inner virtue not fuelled by materialism. It is a guiding light from our deeper self independent of the outside world.
Ego– It fulfills with negative emotions deriving out of self-pride. These negative emotions are hatred, jealousy, anger, greed, impatience, and the like. We don’t hesitate to harm and misuse others.
Self Respect – When we ride high on self-respect, we love ourselves and respect others. We don’t harm people, self-respect never allows us to do so. Instead, we follow compassion.
Ego– We have unreasonable expectations from others. When people fulfill, we feel good about them. When they don’t, we are hurt and feel negative about them. We don’t realize it’s not people’s responsibility to fulfill our expectations.
Self Respect- We don’t bank on people to fulfill our undue expectations. We don’t form a negative opinion about anyone. Love is all we have!
Ego– We never ask for others’ opinions. According to us, whatever we say is right and whatever we do is the best. We impose our decision on others.
Self Respect– We seek others’ opinions and value them. You never impose your decision on others. And if they have a better solution, you appreciate it. You never find it demeaning about others having a better approach than you.
Ego– People don’t like us and they avoid meeting. The reason is clear… we are not good with them. They may fear us but trust me, they don’t love us.
Self Respect– We create a positive aura all around. People feel comfortable and everyone loves us, barring the ones who are egoistic.
Ego– Success makes us feel the best where no one is better than us. When we fail, ego is into bits and pieces and it feels like a loser.
Self Respect– Respect is unsubjected to success or a failure. Failures polish our respect as we find a lesson in it. And about success, it doesn’t rush our minds to Everest either.
Ego – It’s a weakness. If we are egoistic, appreciation makes us feel strong and criticism feels weak. Both feelings are infectious. Especially critics, we have trough times dealing them.
Self Respect– It’s a strength. When we ride high on self respect, we are uninterested in both appreciation and criticism. We may enjoy appreciation, but we don’t need it. And criticism is what we look forward to, as it opens unexplored dimensions.
Ego– Ego never lets us appreciate others for their achievements and credentials. But when it comes to criticizing and blaming others, there’s no one better us.
Self Respect– When we ride on self respect, we appreciate and admire others for their credentials and achievements. We hold back from criticizing others and put our perspective forward in a gentle way.
Ego– We are always under the illusion of being judged by others. where we fear people’s judgments. We rely a lot on what people feel about us.
Self Respect– There is no fear of people arising from self-judgments as we are indifferent to people’s judgments. We don’t judge ourselves based on their opinions about us.
Ego– It’s a vice leading to greed and endless desires that refrain from feeling happiness in the present moment.
Self Respect– It is a virtue that makes us feel blessed and content. Our happiness quotient is always high.
I hope these differences make us realize:
Self Respect is everything!
Time for some Happy Realizations
Let’s recall the memories of people we notice are down to earth.
Why? It’s simple: These people are beautiful regardless of their identities.
Unlike egoistic people, they are not show-offs. They have humility. People sailing in self respect ask our opinions, help whosoever in need. They are comfortable with anyone around.
Who are these people?
These people are none other than people riding high on self respect.
Let’s sink in the foundation of respect’s pride is permanent. It’s unconnected to the opinions of the outside world.
On the contrary, the foundation of the ego’s pride is temporary. It drives on name, fame, money, power. When we are devoid, our ego is shattered. And with that, we are broken too.
So yes, there’s not a thin line of difference between ego and self-respect. It’s greater than that. Now it’s up to us to choose…Ego or Self Respect?
Good luck!!
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