People often confuse whether they are egoistic or riding high on self-respect. You might be one of those many people who confuse between the two … You confuse because both the feelings infuse a sense of pride for oneself. But trust me, ego and self-respect are the two extremes of a single line.
Unlocking the mystery is very important. And therefore, it is imperative to know the differences between ego and self-respect. But before moving to the differences, let us get acquainted with both the terms one by one.
Ego is a negative feeling. It is a feeling evolved when you deliberately compare yourself with others. You compare yourself with people smaller or weaker than you in terms of money, power, authority, appearance, anything. The reason why you compare is to feel superior, bigger and powerful than others.
On the other hand, Self-respect is a positive feeling. It is a feeling of taking pride in what you are and who you are. It is a sense of higher being derived when you positively accept oneself regardless of money, power, position, appearance. It is only connected to oneself. The virtue of self-respect is regardless of people and things.
There is a quote by a famous American Author John C. Maxwell…“There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. ‘Good pride’ represents our dignity and self-respect. ‘Bad pride’ is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.”
Well, this quote wonderfully defines the two often confused feelings- Ego and Self-Respect.
Now, let us explore some more differences…
Differences between ego and self-respect:
Ego– You respect yourself and the ones whom you consider superior to you.
Self respect-You respect yourself and everyone, irrespective of their power, money, fame, recognition, anything.
Ego– Me, me and only me…You think only about your self-interest, even if it is at the cost of hurting others. What worse, you don’t even feel guilty for the same.
Self-respect– We, we or after you…You talk about the interests of everyone as a whole. You are always conscious of the right and wrong. And you never ever hurt anyone intentionally.
Ego– You always try to compare and compete with others. You want to beat others at any cost.
Self-respect– You never compare yourself with others. You compete only with oneself because of the strive to become a better individual.
Ego– You can do anything, opt for the wrong means, be manipulative just to satisfy your ego.
Self-respect– Your respect for oneself is supreme which stops you from committing to the wrong. Self-respect always encourages you to choose the right way. It motivates you to endure harder by providing you inner-strength.
Ego– You fear new people and situations. The reason why you fear is you think that the new people or situations could take away the reasons responsible for your negative self-pride.
Self-respect– You don’t fear anyone and anything. Instead, you welcome the new as a result of your positive attitude and self-belief.
Ego– Ego resides on the materialistic achievements and drives. When you buy an expensive mobile or a new car, it boosts your ego. You start feeling superior to others. But when you lose money and power, your ego gets shattered.
Self-respect– Self-respect is an inner virtue which is not fuelled by the materialistic forces. It comes from within and again, you don’t lose your self-respect when you lose the materialistic achievements.
Ego– Ego can fill you with negative emotions deriving out of negative self-pride. These negative emotions are hatred, jealousy, anger, greed, impatience, and the like. As a result, you never hesitate to harm and misuse others.
Self-respect – When you are riding high on self-respect, you love and respect others.You do not harm others, your self-respect will never let you do so. Instead, you help others whenever they need it.
Ego– You have unreasonably high expectations from others. When people fulfill your expectations, you feel positive about them. But when your expectations are not fulfilled by them, you get deeply hurt and feel negative about them. You don’t realize that it is not the responsibility of others to fulfill your expectations.
Self-respect– Generally, you don’t have expectation from people. As a result, you don’t lose precious people because of your unreasonable expectations.
Ego– You never ask for others’ opinion. According to you, whatever you say is right and whatever you do is the best. You tend to impose your decision on others.
Self-Respect– You seek others’ opinion and value it. You never impose your decision on others. And if they have a better solution, you appreciate it and follow it. You never find it demeaning that others have a better approach than you.
Ego– People don’t like you and they avoid you. The reason is clear…You are not good with them. They may fear you but trust me, they don’t love you.
Self Respect– You create a very positive aura around you. People feel very comfortable with you. You are loved by everyone, barring the ones who are egoistic.
Ego– In case of success, you start feeling that you are the best. And there is no one better than you. When you fail, your ego is into bits and pieces. You start feeling like a loser.
Self-respect– Your self-respect remains indifferent in case of a success or a failure. Failures cannot harm your self-respect. You try to extract success even out of a failure.
Ego – Ego is a weakness. If you are egoistic, appreciation makes you feel strong and criticism makes you feel weak. Yes, you find it extremely difficult to handle criticism. Moreover, when you are wrong, you never apologize because you never accept your mistake.
Self-respect– Self-respect is a strength. If you are riding high on self-respect, you are indifferent to both appreciation and criticism. You may enjoy appreciation, but you don’t need it. When you are criticised, you try to analyze the reason behind the criticism. If you find that you are wrong, you accept your mistakes, feel sorry for the same and try to rectify it.
Ego– Your ego never lets you appreciate others for their achievements and credentials. When it comes to criticising and blaming others, there is no one better than you.
Self-respect– When you are riding high on Self-respect, you always appreciate and admire others for their credentials and achievements. Moreover, you hold back yourself from criticising others. You try to make them realize their mistakes in a gentle and polite way.
Ego– You are always under the illusion of being judged by others. And you fear people’s judgments. You rely a lot on what people feel about you.
Self-Respect– You are concerned about what you feel about yourself than to what people feel about you. And so, you are indifferent to people’s judgments.
Ego– It is a vice which makes you greedy, leading to the never-ending desires. These desires refrain you from feeling happiness in the present moment.
Self-respect– It is a virtue which makes you feel blessed and content. When you are high on self-respect, you are always high on happiness.
Time for some Happy Realizations!!!
Try to recall some people whom you denote as ‘Down to earth’?
Have you ever tried to analyze why? I will tell you the reason…
It is because these people possess noticeable things-money, power, appearance, recognition or any such things. But regardless of the possessions, they are a wonderful person. They have some beautiful qualities which are independent of the materialistic possessions. They are not showoffs, unlike egoistic people. They are nice to you and respect you. They ask for your opinions, help you whenever you are in need. You are always comfortable when they are around. Do you know who are these people?
These people are none other than the people riding high on self-respect…
Summon to mind the foundation of your respect’s pride is permanent. It is permanent because it is regardless of any reason. When you start knowing your inner-self, you start respecting oneself. And with that, you start respecting others.
Whereas, the foundation of your ego’s pride is temporary. It is because your ego is backed by materialistic reasons. When the reasons are over, your ego gets shattered. And with that, you are over too…
So you see, there is not a thin line of difference between ego and self-respect…It is much more than that. I hope the differences are clear and well-explained. Now, it’s up to you to choose…Ego or Self-respect?