Let us Fall in Love with None other than Oneself

The best thing about self-love is that it doesn't demand reciprocation!!!

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self-love

Did you ever fall in love? 
If you have, just keep reading and you will once again… but this time with none other than oneself.

If not love, maybe you felt an infatuation towards somebody at some time. 
A mere physical attraction!

Not even that? Please close this screen and get your hormones checked first.
Haha… I am sure you don’t belong here.
 

Love beyond judgmental mind

 
In today’s glamorama, our attention catches someone now and then.
In fact, many love stories geminate on attraction.
But that’s just a seed.
 
When you truly love someone, the magical feeling is unmatched crossing all the barriers of judgment.
You don’t play mind games when you are in love, know that person inside out.
You accept them gracefully without any concern about their physical or mental appearance.
Let us connect to some feelings when you are in love with somebody.

12 qualities when you are in love

Balancing out others’ weaknesses

No one is perfect.
Not only you appreciate their strengths but also try to cover up their weaknesses.

Forgiveness

Humans commit mistakes, and you accept that.
You may fight with the person whom you love, land in arguments but eventually, you forgive him/her.

Not holding back to apologize

This is difficult otherwise but not in the case of love where there is no room for ego.
It’s because you value your relationship more than your ego.

Expressing Love

Now and then, you express your love to them in your peculiar way.
You don’t hold back in making them feel special.
 

Make them realize when they are wrong

Not only you admire their right, but also try to make them realize their egoistic behaviors in person, not openly
 

Respect Differences

Everyone is an exclusive package.
You might have nothing in common but maybe this is what you like about them.

Never insult them

When you love them, you never make fun of them, never embarrass them.
You never hurt their sentiments intentionally.

Respect and Trust Them

You respect them more than you love them.
You trust them more than anyone else.
The reason is you know that respect and trust are strong foundations of a healthy love relationship. 

Motivate and Encourage

Not only you cherish their moments of success with them, but also try to motivate and cheer them up in their failures.

No Comparison

You don’t compare any attributes of your loved ones with others, be it good or bad.
You love them the way they are and you never want to change their uniqueness.

Always around in there tough times

Life is all about peaks and valleys.
And you never leave their hand in their darkest of phases.

Flowing love

Your love for that person never fades with passing time and it is not situational. It blossoms and matures beautifully.

I am sure you could relate to many of these feelings if you have ever been in love. But let me raise a question on your behalf.
Aren’t we talking about the fortunate ideal relationships?
 

Heartfelt curiosities

Dear friend, even if your infatuation transpired into love, does it guarantee the same reciprocation from the one you love?

What about those one-sided love and those broken trusts?
You cannot ignore those.
In fact needs more attention as the way people get affected.

 
You see, the qualities which we are talking about are subjected to one condition…Reciprocation.
Don’t you think so?
When you don’t get the same reciprocation, it hurts, and it hurts terribly.

But you know, you cannot blame the person concerned either.
It’s because love is your choice which you cannot subject to expectations.
 
What do we do then?
How do we overcome this pain?
You might be the one on this boat seeking the shore.

So here I present to you a straightforward solution…

 

Start loving yourself and get rid of that pain.
You need not do anything different.
Just scroll up and read the 12 qualities when you are in love with someone, the same needs to be practiced with oneself.

Feel the same emotions for yourself where you don’t have to wait for reciprocation. Better said than done, let us try to get down to the nitty-gritty.
 

The step by step process to Self Love

 
  • Self-Awareness

Dedicate at least 30 min to Me-time, preferably in the mornings where you observe everything brushing your mind without judgments.
It brings clarity.
The more you know yourself, the more you thrive to become a better individual.

  • Self-Acceptance

The subsequent step is accepting yourself the way you are.
Humans commit mistakes, not robots.
This is when self-confession is important so you don’t have to criticize and punish yourself for your mistakes and failures.
Learn from them and make sure you don’t commit them again.
It cuts the flow of self-harming thoughts if any.

  • Self-Compassion

Hereon, you counter thoughts of self-hatred.
Sometimes, your mind wants to commit actions which your soul can feel are wrong.
And when you commit to it, your soul gets hurt.
When the soul is hurt, you cannot love yourself.
Practice self-control and make a conscious effort not to commit to it.
Take up little instances where you say no to yourself.

  • Self-love

You reach a state where you stop judging and start loving oneself.
And when you reach this state, everyone and everything around becomes beautiful.
What better, when you love anyone after reaching the state of self-love, your love for them is pure and unconditional.

  • Self-absorption!

Careful! You don’t have to reach here.
Stop in the previous step.
Because sometimes when you love yourself, everything about you is perfect for you.
In this state, you cannot identify your shortcomings and weaknesses.
And finally, self-love may turn into self-obsession and you might become an egoistic mind.

Must readDifferences between ego and self-respect

Hang on, there are still some unanswered questions…

What if you are not seeking shores and you want your boat to keep sailing always?
If that’s the case, is there a possibility that your boat drowns at some time?
What I mean is even if you are one of those lucky ones whose love for someone has found reciprocation, does that guarantee a life-time togetherness?

Life is unpredictably short.
An unpredictable end of a successful love relationship hurts even more.
It is because of the attachment and bond you share with them. 

If I were to answer

A quote from Gautama Buddha my answer…
“Attachment is the root cause of suffering”
which means the more we attach to something, the more we get hurt.
So let us learn the art of loving with detachment.
But it is only possible when you are so attached to yourself that you are less attached to anyone or anything. 

Yes, if you have the gift of self-love, the recovery state is easier.

So here I conclude that irrespective of whether it is a one-sided love affair or a mutual love relation, self-love must be above all.

What are the positive extracts from self-love?

  1.  It always restricts you from consciously committing the wrong.
  2. You never fall, you always rise in self-love. It is because you never get cheated or betrayed.
  3. You don’t get affected by what people have to say about you because self-love creates a strong aura.
  4. The best thing… the person whom you love is always with you till your last breath.

Final Realizations

I never say don’t fall in love with anyone.
But never let your innocence die because of someone and lose self-love.
Always let love for oneself be supreme.
This way, no matter if you fall prey to the broken trusts, one-sided love, or inevitable-destines, rest assured, you will never get hurt.
Your self-love will not let that happen.
Good luck!

 

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