Tag: HAPPY REALIZATION

Morals are the basic understandings, values, and beliefs of a particular person or a group or a culture that defines how we should live our life. Sometimes, these are written or expressed in books; sometimes these are words of great people whom we believe.   Morals are universal teachings that we try to practice every day. Morals are ideal in themselves. They help us in choosing a response to a particular situation. Ideally, they teach the concept of right and wrong. Now, when a person believes in these teachings or values and acts accordingly in his day to day life, then these beliefs become a trait of that person. For instance, one should be loyal, is a belief. Loyalty becomes the character of that person. Therefore, we must summon into minds that we build our character on the ideas of our morals. Building a morale is a continuous process, which takes time. It is not a one-day phenomenon. A person's upbringing also plays a dominant role in the cultivation of values and morals. Therefore, it also becomes the responsibility of the parents to nurture their child well. Also, guide them to follow the right path.

Before starting any journey, one has to know the destination.  Without a destination, the voyage is incomplete.  Let us assume that we have a set of skills. However, until we don’t know what to do with those skills, they are good for nothing. It’s like living life without a purpose. Goals are essential to move forward in life. Moreover, they help us in harnessing our energy in the right direction. Subsequently, they result in productivity from our efforts and energy.  Goals help us realize our true potential. We come to know about where we stand today and what needs to be done to raise our standards. A goal not only helps us in measuring our progress but also helps in maintaining our focus. A goal oriented person never gets distracted.  Moreover, when we subdivide our goals into small targets, it excitingly motivates us and keeps up our motivational level. Therefore, it is vital to set a goal and work for it.  

As it comes: Everyone loves appreciation and appraisal from others. Come on, accept it that you like to get praised by others. It is because you get boosted and motivated by those appreciations. Sometimes, you even get flattered by those praises. But, there are a few questions you need to ask yourself before you enjoy those praises and appreciation from others. A few heartfelt questions: Are you worthy of those applauds? Do you also sense a feeling of self-accomplishment for the work or action you are getting appreciation from others? Are the ones praising you honestly your well-wishers? If not, then why are they praising you? Is there any hidden motive behind that false appreciation? Why are you not enjoying the appreciation when others are praising you? Do you really deserve those praises?   Huh...That was some quality brainstorming because these questions really are the need of the hour. There might be many How’s and Why’s playing hide and seek with your mind. Let us try to seek the answers.  The search for answers: First and foremost, sink into your mind that your reason to feel happy should never be that others are happy with your work or action. The things for which you are getting praised should make you happy at the first place.  My dear friend, it is absolutely fine when you are getting praised for something which is also giving you a feeling of accomplishment. The praises from others must be worthy when YOU are impressed with YOURSELF. It must be the case where praises from the outer world should be a bonus. You might want it, but you may not need it. Well, you are quite aware of the fact that how important it is to be self-motivated to keep moving in this competitive world.  This feeling of contentment derived out of self-accomplishment always keeps you up and running. But sometimes, even when you don't deserve the praises, you get it from others. Who are those people and why are they praising you? There are some people who heartily want to motivate you. Those people are your well-wishers who don’t want you to feel depressed. These people are your loved ones who want to uplift you in your lows.  It is the reason why they are praising you even if you don't deserve the appreciation. But there is another set of your appreciators, who are not your well-wishers, the ones I am referring to. Dear friend, you have this ability to distinguish between these two sets of people, but you got to TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS. Let me throw some light on the ones whom I am referring. Straight out, the move for which you are getting praised is benefiting them, not you. Your move is deliberately planned by them so that you get the praises while they enjoy the results. They are praising you because you are making them happy like you always do. Wake up before its late. A real-life illustration: I play squash and there was a district-level squash tournament going on. My opponent in the first round was not a...

Like many of my other write-ups, this article also starts with a small story, so that I can fully connect with you.  A short story: Once, there was a sparrow. She realized that her chick is fully grown up. She did not want the child sparrow to be dependent on her anymore. She wanted her child to experience the life austerities and struggles. After all, her chick had experienced all the comforts.  She felt that it was the right time for her chick to experience and challenge the other side of life. One day, she gave her valuable life lessons and made her aware of the cruel realities of life. Finally, she made her realize that now the time has come where her chick should learn how to live an independent life.   So, the mother sparrow asked her chick to build a nest on its own. She advised her to be very careful while making it. The baby sparrow fled here, there, everywhere to collect the twigs. While she was collecting the twigs, she came across a field covered with mustard plants. It was a beautiful yellow field full of mustard beans.  The field was well plowed, and therefore, there were soft worms on that plowed field. Seeing that, the baby sparrow was overjoyed. No better food she could have asked for. The mother sparrow once came to see how her child was progressing. The baby sparrow narrated her mother how she is planning to prepare her nest on that plowed field. She described her everything; the mustard seeds, the flowers, and the worms. The baby sparrow thought that she has made her mother proud and was expecting a pat on the back. To her shock, there was a very stern look on her mother’s face. The mother sparrow wanted her child to be aware of the cons associated with her decision. It made the baby sparrow furious as she was very high on life and didn’t want to take any of her mother's advice. The concerned mother tried a lot to make her daughter realize, but all went in vain. The disheartened mother sparrow left.  The baby sparrow did not get affected by it at all. Without giving a second thought, she built her nest on the strongest branch of one of the trees in that particular field. It was a well-built swinging nest. Besides, it was all beautiful and colorful around.  The baby sparrow felt victorious that she did not have to move around in search of food. Within no time, she got addicted to the luxuries of life. Gradually, her wings could no longer support her weight. The baby sparrow started to feel dull, lethargic and sluggish. The weather changed, which added to her plight. Because of the weather change, the flowers began to fall, and the worms started to disappear. What more, one day a farmer came and harvested the entire field. The baby sparrow could hardly analyze what was happening around. What once looked like an ideal life turned out to be the worst of...

This write-up is quite close to my heart as it is straight out from my heart. I was going through an ugly phase in my life, and like many others didn't have the courage to accept it. That phase has taught me a lot and it is my responsibility to share a few of my realizations. As it comes: First of all, be patient. RELAX. It is entirely reasonable. In fact, don’t forget to Thank God as He has made you an emotionally active person. Also, you are smarter and pro-active than many others. It is because you at least understood, realized and accepted the fact that you are facing rational problems and now, you are ready to challenge it and find the solutions to these problems. It is the reason why you are here, scrolling down, seeking solutions to solve your physiological mysteries. Well done mate! You deserve a pat on your back as you landed on the right harbor.  Believe me; I can completely understand what you are going through from inside. It is the flood of negative emotions inside you, which is not only keeping you away from happiness but also choking your breath.  Reasons to feel negative: I know your reasons to feel negative might be varied and classified. Sometimes, you blame people, at times situations and sometimes destiny for your negativity. Actually, It is opposite to the way you think.You need to realize that facing negativity is not a problem.A bitter realization is on its way...You need to realize the cause of your negativity is no one except YOU. It might have come hard at you but most of the times, it is a fact. The sooner you realize it, the sooner you act to target the right cause for your negativity and subsequently, act upon it. Friends, we all love the blame game. Nevertheless, what happens after the blame game? Do you feel light or does your negativity gets eliminated? No, never. In fact, it acts as a base to attract more negative energies. This process goes on and on until you become an entirely negative person. The entire process: You need to comprehend the vicious circle, which is ruining us. It will enable you to target the right problem and work on that. Let me explain this vicious circle by boiling down to the nitty-gritty. The vicious circle: Idleness- Thinking- Overthinking- Feel less- Losing the awareness in the present moment-Losing happiness- Negative thinking- A fully negative person- Blame game- Non-productivity/Idleness. This flow chain says it all. Let me explain it to you quickly. You are not always working. Sometimes, when your mind is not working, instead of feeling and enjoying the now, most of us involve our minds in idle-thinking. Idle-thinking is extremely dangerous as your mind is not thinking about anything productive that time. When that thinking is stretched for an elongated time, it leads to overthinking. Overthinking about anything non-productive acts as a base to attract other negative energies. One point to be noted is that it is the idle-thinking, which I am talking about,...

The inevitable process We all are distinct individuals. We look different, think different. We respond to a given situation differently. We all have unique personal, social and professional background. Our interests, strengths, weaknesses, core competencies are all varied and diversified. We all are unique in our ways. Undoubtedly, most of us haven’t met in person and do not know one another personally. However, we all have someone very familiar around us. He is the one who clings on each of us individually and characteristically. May I present you, our omnipresent friend ‘STRESS.' I know I am personifying ‘Stress' but  to  connect well with this state of mind, pause and think; ‘doesn’t “it”, rather “he”  seem like our best friend?’ You might have got a hint….with a realization. I know it is not easy to admit, but it is a venomous truth. We shall try to face it, accept it and seek solutions. Most of us might also be wondering that how can we be friends with stress, let alone being best of friends. We all want to keep stress away from our lives, but how many of us have succeeded in doing so? Well, I don't think this question needs to be answered.  Fine, let us try to check the authentication level of our affinity with stress. Qualities of our best friend: We all are very well aware of the qualities of a best friend. Let us try to figure out that does he (Stress) has the same qualities that our best friends have? The first and the foremost quality best friends have is that they are trustworthy. Come what may, they will never leave you. Rest assured, our relationship with stress is also very healthy and sustainable. Sometimes, it even lasts for a lifetime. The second quality we find in our best friends is that they never let us feel lonely and alone. Stress again meets and fulfills this promise. No matter whatever the situations most of us are in, stress accompanies us anywhere and everywhere. In fact, many of his friends like anxiety, nervous tension, worry, fear, and impatience also join the party. I am sure we don’t like them, but how can we say no to the friends of our best friend. Ok, let us check out the following quality. Whenever we are stuck in panic and dreaded situations, we want our best friends to be with us. Ta-da….here he comes, just like a jinni. The only difference is that here we don’t have to rub the Magical Lamp. Stress always accompanies us when we get stuck in these situations. Final and the most liked about quality we observe in our best friends is that even if they are not physically present with us, they are always connected with us mentally. And you know what, stress entirely bestows this quality. You can be cent percent sure about it. In fact, stress is one step ahead of all of them. He is capable enough to affect our physical and the mental health both at...

Self Realization and Self Actualization... Let me start this post with a short story. It is a typical father-son conversation, but it is not stereotypical by any means... Father: Son, why are you sitting alone with a long face? Son: Nothing Dad, I just want to be alone. Father: That's absolutely fine...but whenever you want to talk about anything, I am always around. Son: (Sighs) Dad, please stay. (After a long pause) Can I say something? Father: (Smiles) Of course, go ahead. I am all ears. Son: Dad, I am feeling very lonely and depressed. I don’t know what to do. I don’t have any idea where my life is heading. I am not able to find any course of action to be implemented.  My inner-self is at all time low.  I look back and I only find failures. I am feeling worthless and helpless. I am not able to handle the stress. I am losing it. It has also started taking a toll on my conduct. My anger is taking a toll on me. I have begun losing my friends because of my behavioral changes. I am losing awareness. I am losing happiness. I am losing myself. Dad, I am losing everything. (about to cry). Father: Relax son. Have a glass of water. (Calms him down and begins). Let me share a real-life incident with you which I underwent around 20 years back. That day, I got a salary hike, and I was returning home from the office. I had a scooter to commute those days. On that particular day, because of the heavy and relentless rain, I had to hire a public transport (bus) to come back home from the office. While I was on my way back home, I was jubilant. I was happy because I got a raise that day. It was like a dream come true. Whatmore, I got a seat to sit on the bus which was full. I was feeling very lucky and happy. I was on top of the world.  In due course, an elderly woman boarded the bus. She stood by my seat as there were no empty seats available. A few moments later, with an agonizing look, she expressed that she is tired and not able to stand. She wanted me to get up from the seat and allow her to sit. I was too high and busy in myself that I didn’t bother about her pain. Not even that, with a grinning smile, I made fun of her. I even passed her lousy comments. I was so important to me that time that I was not able to realize her misery. She was so disturbed that she left there and moved to the rear side of the bus. After some time, I turned back. Finally, she got a seat to sit. A girl, who whose age was around 20 had given her seat to her (old woman). I was stunned to see who that girl was. You will be shocked too. Do you want to know who was she? Son:  Absolutely...