Do you lose your temper when someone cuts you in traffic?
Or you feel guilty of exploding on anyone you can exercise your dominance, especially children, which you afterward regret?
If something sounds relevant, you need to control your anger.
Mismanaged anger can destroy personal, professional, and social relationships.
It disturbs the peace inside.
Sometimes it’s hard to overturn consequences of fuming anger, especially broken trust and respect in a relationship.
Table of Contents
Why do you feel angry? Is anger bad?
You feel angry when people don’t act and situations don’t happen, according to you.
Stubborn thoughts conquer the mind under the rule of ego.
All look perfect until the outside world happens according to your desire.
When people agree to you, you feel proud, unconsciously tuning to a self-boasting state.
But then comes people’s perspective, their choice differs yours, and suddenly you dislike everyone and everything.
You feel hurt, and your dwindled ego cries.
It gets cranky, loaded with stress, and starts yelling on people, even on oneself (those brutal self-judgments).
But that’s the downside of uncontrolled anger.
Though anger is a negative emotion, it’s not a useless emotion.
It powers you with courage to raise a voice for a cause or second a perspective.
Anger is the driver of negative motivation, encouraging you to stand up against bullies and unethical behaviors.
So anger is a powerful emotion, not bad.
We just don’t know to manage anger.
16 magical anger management techniques
Know your triggers
Anger is a little mud over the hard surface of other negative emotions.
Tap on to your anger and embrace it, till you explore the underlying emotions triggering it.
Jealousy or an Unfulfilled expectation… what’s your trigger?
Express in person when you turn calmer
Never hold a grudge.
Talk to them and clear misunderstandings when temperature stabilizes.
Holding it for long converts the loop of thoughts to negative emotions, which mires the raw and true feelings.
Initiate your expression with ‘I’ statement having less or no ‘You’
Try improving the quality of your argument.
Say something like I feel bad as I’m already hurt or I can’t take this as I’m already feeling low.
Then to say:
How can you say this? It’s your fault. What’s wrong with you?
Don’t stop yourself from being sensitive
I am overly sensitive towards emotions.
What I found that’s one trait of my attitude.
I need not change it, instead, stop judging myself for that.
The less I self-judge, the less the anger, the more self-love floats, and the more I spread love.
Stop focussing on personality when you are alone
You lose on life experiences if you spend Me-time adjusting your personality.
You become more and more rigid.
That rigidity fuels the anger most of the time.
Let the people define your personality, stop self-labeling your identity, it’s not your job.
Enhance quality of lifestyle
What nutrition you intake, your discipline at work, and how much you rest, these mostly define your lifestyle.
And a healthy lifestyle is a vital element of conscious living, so work on it.
It’s a must for sanity where you are not fuming over little things.
Affirmation of positive thoughts
It’s a practice, 10-min everyday session.
Positive self talks soaked in love during this.
Gratitude and Forgiveness the sole agendas here.
Raise curiosity to analyze opposition’s point of view
In an argument (personal ones), there’s less about right and wrong, more about understanding each other’s perspectives.
And where there is a common interest, try to feel other’s emotions than to judge them through the lens of ego.
Response Rehearsal
One of the best anger management techniques!
Rewind the plot in mind to adapt better next time.
As your subconscious now recognizes the patterns, even repulsiveness at the heat of the moment is less dangerous.
Write it down or Sweat it out
Express your anger in a journal, (maybe burn pages afterward), or sweat that burn in your workout.
I find both refreshing as they tune to contentment and restores clarity.
And the anger is controllable.
Don’t take deep and personal
Life is not so serious as you look at it.
It’s a thriving journey, not an unconscious ride on negative energies.
You cannot know most of the things, but you can always experience them.
And conscious experiences are like creating a beautiful past where the flashbacks are nostalgic, not anger-provoking punctures.
Take those Fun breaks
Recall that one activity you love to do but don’t have time for it now.
How about a time-out from a workflow to take out the memoir and pour down your souvenirs?
Yes I love to write.
You do whatever you love in that break.
Love is the secret cure for anger.
Think logically about repurcussions of decisions made in anger
You know well how uncontrolled anger can ruin everything.
Make sure you don’t take red hot decisions blazing in anger.
The fumes rise enough to burn the respect in a relationship.
And the lost respect is hard to restore.
Talk out to a friend who makes you peaceful
A friend, mentor, guide, anyone.
Express out, vent out the anger.
Alert! Don’t be abusive about the language of expression.
Offensive language tilts awareness to negativity and the anger stays.
Anyway, a good friend helps you break that flow.
Take negative feedbacks as constructive criticism
Just a tuning of mind where criticisms are better than a shut mouth.
When people connect with you, there are a lot of takeaways, deep lessons from them.
So honor their opinion and treat well the people who criticize (even if you don’t love them).
They are big learning curves.
Connect with your body experiences
Awareness to belly button,
Attending tensions in the body via breaths.
Cracking those nerves on a neck or shoulder roll,
If not anything, staying still in a quiet place for 5 min, doing nothing.
It keeps you connected inside, where you are less prone to the outside triggers of anger.
I hope you find any of these simple anger management techniques useful.
The best prescription for anger management
Love! Precisely Self-love.
The less you seek for approvals outside, the more love you pump inside.
Then you can express love to spread it outside.
The more they get, the more they give, and the more it drives you to feel more.
And even if you are devoid of self-love, try to follow compassion.
The act of compassion is not always materialistic, it’s your style of empathizing with others’ pain.
It’s a pain reliever!
So yes mate, let the unconditional exchange of love prevail.
Instead of exploring ways to kill the emotion anger, let us try managing anger healthily.
Here are some of the best anger management quotes.
