Self Improvement and Motivation

Do you lose your temper when someone cuts you in traffic? Or you feel guilty of exploding on anyone you can exercise your dominance, especially children, which you afterward regret? If something sounds relevant, you need to control your anger. Mismanaged anger can destroy personal, professional, and social relationships. It disturbs the peace inside.   Sometimes it’s hard to overturn consequences of fuming anger, especially broken trust and respect in a relationship. Why do you feel angry? Is anger bad? You feel angry when people don’t act and situations don’t happen, according to you. Stubborn thoughts conquer the mind under the rule of ego. All look perfect until the outside world happens according to your desire.   When people agree to you, you feel proud, unconsciously tuning to a self-boasting state. But then comes people’s perspective, their choice differs yours, and suddenly you dislike everyone and everything. You feel hurt, and your dwindled ego cries. It gets cranky, loaded with stress, and starts yelling on people, even on oneself (those brutal self-judgments). But that’s the downside of uncontrolled anger.  Though anger is a negative emotion, it’s not a useless emotion. It powers you with courage to raise a voice for a cause or second a perspective.  Anger is the driver of negative motivation, encouraging you to stand up against bullies and unethical behaviors.  So anger is a powerful emotion, not bad.  We just don’t know to manage anger. 16 magical anger management techniques  Know your triggers Anger is a little mud over the hard surface of other negative emotions. Tap on to your anger and embrace it, till you explore the underlying emotions triggering it. Jealousy or an Unfulfilled expectation... what’s your trigger? Express in person when you turn calmer Never hold a grudge. Talk to them and clear misunderstandings when temperature stabilizes. Holding it for long converts the loop of thoughts to negative emotions, which mires the raw and true feelings. Initiate your expression with ‘I’ statement having less or no ‘You’ Try improving the quality of your argument.  Say something like I feel bad as I’m already hurt or I can’t take this as I’m already feeling low. Then to say: How can you say this? It’s your fault. What’s wrong with you? Don’t stop yourself from being sensitive I am overly sensitive towards emotions.  What I found that’s one trait of my attitude. I need not change it, instead, stop judging myself for that. The less I self-judge, the less the anger, the more self-love floats, and the more I spread love. Stop focussing on personality when you are alone You lose on life experiences if you spend Me-time adjusting your personality.  You become more and more rigid. That rigidity fuels the anger most of the time. Let the people define your personality, stop self-labeling your identity, it’s not your job. Enhance quality of lifestyle What nutrition you intake, your discipline at work, and how much you rest, these mostly define your lifestyle. And a healthy lifestyle is a vital element of conscious living, so work on it. It’s a must for sanity where you are not fuming over little things. Affirmation of positive thoughts It’s a practice, 10-min everyday session.  Positive self talks soaked in love during this. Gratitude and Forgiveness the sole agendas here. Raise curiosity to...

The extended lockdown period... is it taking a toll on your mental health? Are you yearning to step out of lockdown to fulfill your desires? Is the pain of world outside transiting into your suffering? Do you struggle to utilize the Me time you never got before? Do you foresee uncertainties, leading to dilemmas, on the other side of pandemics? If any of these is happening with you during the Corona outbreak, your mind is turning into a theatre of psychological dramas. High time mate! You better stop engaging with your thoughts. Let’s understand what’s cooking A hell lot is happening around you, infact the whole world is suffering. Like too much to take! And amidst all these, the viral pictures of grief, remorse, sorrow, helplessness, are everywhere, in social media and news channels, making worse for the mind to sail smoothly with this life transition. The normal routine... regular thinking patterns... all disrupted! Nothing is motivating, nothing seems inspiring about the world right now. To add final nail to the coffin, this extended lockdown period! What all of it is resulting to? Overflowing thoughts... conspiring against each other, causing severe damage to your sanity. I was hit hard by lows during this quarantine. And as I always do, I consciously chose to explore the dark. I walked out in a better headspace! A few mindshifts pulled me out from the slumps of my mind. I am happy sharing these as my suggestions; hope you find them useful. 4 Mindshifts for a better headspace A mere acceptance of your pain Human race is mourning to bereavement, Eyes around reflect deep down fears, Destitution struck so hard the poor are starving to death, Economies gravely affected; savings vaporizing than never, Future looks ambiguous... the other side under dilemmas,  Like everything brought to a standstill! Difficult time this... as there is only pain to attract from the outside world. You never stood here before, and your mind is clueless about the way out. The result: A chaotic mind that produces anxiety. But my dear friend... you need to realize: Not only you, your family, your city, or your country... It’s the entire world that’s unsettled right now. So what you are going through is fine. It’s the current normal! Yes you need to accept this right now... Better said... you might wonder: How should I gracefully accept this change? Just acknowledge you are not battling alone. It's not only about you this time... we are in this together! This offers you strength to stand in solidarity, as we people are kind of sharing identical pain. It brings the acceptance you need! Trust me... Acceptance of pain is that reliever that never allows your pain turn into suffering. Consciously experience the biggest blessing — You are Alive! You are blessed to be alive, sitting at home, comfortable with your family, away from the virus, getting enough luxuries for a healthy living. You got to feel grateful for this! You are fortunate than millions suffering in this pandemic. Please don't let that feeling of gratitude die in your sub-consciousness. If I ask you:  Did you experience the fear of being asymptomatic to Covid-19 at any point? I think many of us would admit: Yes... I felt that... just for a little... but I did! If...

How many times are you told by elders, friends and mentors to develop a positive attitude? Everyone instructs to do it, but only a few have directions on how to do it? What’s your attitude An attitude is a mindset developed over time, through experiences of resilience and observations about people and things.  It’s a predisposition to respond in a certain way, to both the known and unknown.  Simply, your attitude is your perspective towards life proceedings. It speaks a lot about you. Expressions ( often called as body language) is the indicator of your attitude towards people.  That doesn’t mean you should start dancing to them. Allow the real inside to roll your reel outside. And that’s why we need a positive attitude, to respond better in the now, so we unlock our desires, and dive into the flow of achieving them.  What's Positive Attitude? Positive attitude is Integrity —  honesty towards people and commitment to oneself.  The headspace where you are optimistic yet surrender to the present beyond control. It unleashes vibes of nothing to lose and experiences to gain, the approach that sets the spirit free to express your true self and unlock higher possibilities. Positive attitude is luxury you afford piercing comfort. It fosters with practice. Positive attitude is a mind zone where: people's thinking of you doesn't matter to you.  you trust instincts more than your compulsive thoughts. you believe everything will be ok no matter how hard it is right now. good for you includes good for people. there is self respect, no ego. success is just moving. lesson is the name of a failure. you believe no feeling is permanent, neither success nor failure, neither happiness nor sadness. beginning means almost done. you embrace negativity and bliss out to positivity. mind welcomes fear and accepts shortfalls gracefully. you are perseverant until you reach your goal. The headspace where your flowing presence entices everyone in the room is a positive attitude. Top Quotes on Attitude that Inspire “If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.” ― Frances Hodgson Burnett “Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you.” ― Walt Whitman “I do not believe in taking the right decision, I take a decision and make it right.” ― Muhammad Ali Jinnah “If you can quit, quit. If you can't quit, stop complaining - this is what you chose.” ― Joe Konrath “The greatest discovery of all time is that a person can change his future by merely changing his attitude.” — Oprah Winfrey “The saddest summary of a life contains three descriptions: could have, might have, and should have.” — Louis E. Boone “An attitude of positive expectation is the mark of the superior personality.”  — Brian Tracy “When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” — Helen Keller 15 mindsets to develop a positive attitude Boils to Discipline when you Lack Motivation in Work Show up to work no matter how low you feel. Just showing up is half the job done. Begin your session with a 15 min exercise where you...

We might be one of those who confuse between Self respect the virtue and Ego the vice.The reason is simple:Both infuse a sense of pride. What I feel is ego and self respect are the two extremes of a single line. Unlocking the mystery is vital. Before moving to the differences, let us address the two — Ego and Self Respect. Definitions of Ego and Self Respect Ego is negative. It is an emerging belief arising from deliberate comparison of oneself with others.We compare ourselves with both the higher and lower people we consider in terms of money, power, authority, appearance, anything. Either we feel superior or we get hurt. Self respect is positive. There is a deeper consciousness where we commit only to actions that don't cause shame while doing it or afterward. A heightened state when there's self-acceptance regardless of possessions and identities.  I love this citation: “There are two kinds of pride, both good and bad. ‘Good pride’ represents our dignity and self-respect. ‘Bad pride’ is the deadly sin of superiority that reeks of conceit and arrogance.” —John C. Maxwell It wonderfully defines the two often confused Ego and Self Respect.Let us jump right into the differences: 15 differences between Ego and Self respect Ego- We bow down to the ones we consider superior to us, and bully/ignore the ones inferior in our adulterated minds.Self Respect- There's a positive attitude where we love everyone including ourselves.Ego- Me only me... there's only self-interest even at the cost of hurting others. What's worse, we are unconscious of it most times.Self Respect- We, we, or after you... We take care of everyone's sentiments, never hurting anyone intentionally. Same time making sure our voice is heard.Ego- We are in constant comparison and competition with others. We desire to beat them anyhow.Self Respect- We don't compare ourselves to others. We aspire to touch our deeper selves.Ego- We deliberately choose the wrong means, opt for shortcuts, be manipulative just to satisfy our ego.Self Respect- Our respect for ourselves is supreme which refrains from committing to the wrong. It encourages to choose difficult paths, the tough responses.Ego- We fear the outside world — people and situations. The reason is simple: Self-conceit is hollow, so we fear any change from the monotony could expose our nudity as naked.Self Respect- We fear no one as there's nothing to hide. We welcome the new through a positive attitude and self-belief. Ego- It dwells on materialistic achievements and alluring drives. We buy an expensive mobile or a new car, it fuels our ego. We feel superior to others. But when we lose money or power, our ego is shattered. There's always dependency for happiness.Self Respect- It is an inner virtue not fuelled by materialism. It is a guiding light from our deeper self independent of the outside world.Ego- It fulfills with negative emotions deriving out of self-pride. These negative emotions are hatred, jealousy, anger, greed, impatience, and the like. We don't hesitate to harm and misuse others.Self Respect - When we ride high on self-respect, we love ourselves and respect...

What does the word 'Appearance' mean? The word Appearance is not that easy to comprehend than it seems. The meaning of 'Appearance' according to of the most of us is sheer 'Physical appearance.' However, if we see only the physical aspect of this word, it's meaning becomes quite elusive and deceptive. It is a lot more extensive than mere physical appearance.  So my dear friend, get ready to meet the other side of your Appearance... Apart from physical appearance, there is another face of the word Appearance, which makes its connotation complete. And that aspect is the 'Mental Appearance.' The mental appearance... sounds strange surely. But let your curiosity levels increase because this is going to be interesting. We shall gradually sort out the mysteries of our Mental Appearance. To continue, we can say that the word ‘Appearance’ has two aspects. One is physical appearance, and the other is the mental appearance. Both the elements combined make the meaning of the word ‘Appearance’ complete. Now, let us try to understand the meaning of both the aspects intensely... Physical appearance? We all are aware of the physical appearance aspect. It constitutes our apparent looks...eyes, ears, nose, skin...the attributes which are physically seen and felt. It is the visible face, the tangible face of our appearance. This is the definition of appearance which most of us have in our minds. But not only that, Physical Appearance also constitutes your presentation to the outside world, how you project yourself to others.  And now, the time has come to unveil the other side of our Appearance...The Mental Appearance. Mental appearance? First of all, when we are calling it the mental appearance, it means it involves our mind. And it is the reason why it's complicated. We all are aware of the fact that it is tough to perceive what exactly is going inside a person’s mind. Our actions are not always the stimuli of what is going inside our unfathomable thoughts. Our mental appearance is a mirror to the things revolving inside a person's mind.  Since others cannot see the mental aspect, it is the intangible face of our appearance. Little clear little unclear but I hope you are getting closer to say hello to your mental appearance...Let us move further without wasting any time. How are both the aspects of our Appearance connected? The ideal condition states that both physical and the mental appearance must be faithful to each other. What I mean is what you showcase to the outside world(Physical appearance) must be exactly the same going inside your mind(Mental appearance). It is the transparency between the two which authenticates our identity and makes us true individuals. But is it happening? No, it's not. In this pretentious world, most of us are not able to maintain a healthy relationship between the two aspects. Both the aspects of our appearance do not complement each other. Always remember, only our physical appearance is not a true depiction of what we are.  Why is it important to have a transparency between both the aspects of our Appearance? Let us try to understand it with a simple process... Our mind...

Ok, let me second that negative people and things surround you. Simultaneously, don't you feel that an individual or a situation detrimental to you could be positive for others? Moreover, don't you think it is entirely practicable that others find you cynical? Having said that, does that make you negative? No, it does not. One thing you need to realize is every individual perceive people and situations according to him/her. I am sorry but only seeing negativity implies that you are wearing a defective pair of lenses. Please stop playing the blame game. Always remember that you can never get affected by others when you have a dominant and a powerful inner-self.  Straight out, getting carried away by negativity emitted by people and situations is your incompetency to deal with it. Feeling cynical because of others implies that you are not under the influence of your aura. It indicates that you are dwelling on others' aura. Summon into mind that YOU are the only reason for your negativity or positivity. You cannot get affected by others if you have a prestigious and powerful inner self. Moreover, one more thing you need to understand is that you should not stay quiet if you have an opinion. Speak up. Express yourself. Let people know what you feel. Flushing out emotional feelings then and there always makes you feel lighter. Subsequently, it enables you to keep away from negativity. Retaining things inside you gives birth to negativity. Eventually, you start playing the blame game. Stop doing it.  

Some of us are busy equating happiness to the past instances while many are awaiting the happiness in the future. Only a few of us are able to realize that happiness is right here, right now in the present moment. If you don't belong to this minority category, this article is a must-read for you. In-depth Realizations... The past is gone, and the future is yet to come. You know it too. But there is a reason why I am stating the obvious. I say so to make you realize that the past cannot be changed, likewise, the future cannot be controlled. You can only take care of the things happening NOW. It is only the present moment which always stays with you. Anyone and everyone might leave you except the present moment, which will always be with you until your last breath. If you agree to it, then allow yourself to enjoy its company and make it your best friend...How? Let us find out: The essence to feel: To enjoy the present moment, the first thing you need to know is that Feel is the essence of  Happiness. So the first thing you need to do is to revive the feel.  But it is not that easy as it sounds. It is because your thoughts are dominant over your ability to feel the present moment. You need to realize that Feel is inversely proportional to Thoughts. If you are thinking more, it means you are feeling less. And if you are doing so, the upcoming part of the article is not something you can afford to miss:  Look, I am not saying that thinking is not important. Of course, it's important. Unless you think, you will not be able to plan. Planning is important to get ready to face the upcoming situations. Also, your professional atmosphere requires thinking. So yes, positive and productive thinking is important. But you need to understand that it is not thinking but negative thinking, which needs to be avoided. To avoid negative thinking, I just want you to feel more and think less. The process of negative thinking... What is the current scenario? When you are always thinking, you are not realizing that simultaneously, you are less responsive to your sense organs. Let us explore how thinking is taking a toll on your sense organs. Eyes- You are not able to view the beauty of the nature surrounding you. Nose- You are unable to feel your blessed breaths, which itself is a form of meditation. Ears- You are unable to listen to the beautiful melodies...sounds of nature, delicate words by your loved ones, and most importantly, you are not listening to your inner voice. Tongue- You are not able to feel the food bites...You are more concerned thinking about what you are eating than to feel the fact that you are eating. Skin- You are unable to sense the gentle winds which want to nourish you, the beautiful touch of your loved ones, and many such things.  Do you know, just by sensing any of the sense organs completely, the feelings you experience can be as...

I wish you undress. Watching you nude would be a wonderful treat. Now before you judge, it’s your mental body I’m talking about! Sounds silly? it’s not: Unwrapping your mental body is as vital as wrapping your physical body. Let's unwrap!   Differences between Nude and Naked  I’m sure your mental body doesn’t wear clothes. It's lying nude but people cannot see you for a simple reason:You don't express your vulnerable originality. (It can be need of your hour), but at least accept your nudity than to live in fear of exposed naked.  I feel: When you unveil your orginality by yourself, you are nude.  When others expose it, you are naked. Seems nuance, but there is a huge difference between the two.   John Berger says:   Nakedness reveals itself. Nudity is placed on display. The nude is condemned to never being naked. Nudity is a form of dress.   The journey to nudity is a painful transformation where you learn the subtle art of giving a damn about people.   Still Confused?   There’s one beautiful citation by MENTAL FLOSS illustrating the difference between naked and nude:   “If you doff your duds to pose while descending a staircase for a tasteful painting done by a respected artist, then you’re nude. If a bunch of paparazzi suddenly burst in through the studio door and take your picture without permission, you are suddenly naked.”   Nude is better than Naked You age, you mature, you ripe while growing in age. Your personality flows with time! Your ‘then and now’ might have a discrepancy.  And now: You want to adapt for own good; Wish to age like a fine wine.  You strive to flow with time; Want to experience your journey consciously. Like to become more and more you!   What's holding you to unleash? People already have an opinion about you. They recognize you a particular way.  And you want to break that monotony! You know you have changed; you want others to accept it. But the grey:  You are afraid of how people will perceive your transformation!!   As bitter as it gets People cannot take it if you grow more than them. They are jealous of your self-awareness.   They crib over your maturity. Your clarity offends them.   People piss off when you attend them less.   No denial, even you have been guilty. But it’s human to commit mistakes; right? This is how we learn. You are probably wondering:Is showcasing nudity that easy? No, it’s not! People restrict you. They try every way to intercept your transformation. Cry, yell, request, they do it all!   But before you quit Showcase one performance where you go all in to become nude. Yes, gather courage to express yourself only once.   Reach out to them and let your soul scream — This is my originality; Accept or Leave!   Trust me, you’ll never have to cover your face with an illusory mask of fear again.   One firm step towards finding yourself is worth giving a shot. One bold attempt to get nude is always better than getting your exposed by people.   Wondering why nudity is paramount? To breathe freely!   Because today or tomorrow they find the real you hiding. You cannot run away from yourself for long.   A few sympathize, most of them call you a liar.   The unbearable suffering is hard to deal with. Your self-esteem reaches...

Have you been hunting for ways to transform into a happier self? It is time to call shots and make some big changes in life.  Well, little did you know but creating a happy bubble around you is easy-peasy. The secret lies in unleashing the potential in you so that you become your best version. Kiss goodbye to anxiety because happiness is not hard-found. Being happy is easier than you think.  So, are you great at chalking out plans and strategies but not quite efficient in implementing them? No problem! Digging into the best of self-improvement books can help you rule out every little hurdle, standing in the way of you and a good life. Believe it or not but self-help books work like magic. Taking cues from the insights shared by the greatest minds in the world, reading lines that are inspiring and healing and getting a hang of simple, developmental exercises, the perks of engaging in self-improvement books are way more than you can imagine.  Wondering where to start? Don’t worry because here’s a curated list of 10 best self-improvement books of 2020 Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert If you’ve been dreaming of taking pleasure in a fairytale life, Big Magic is a must-read. The author has splendidly jotted down stories, spilling beans about her experiences with magic and creativity. Read more to find out what makes her life so much happy and fulfilling. Buy Now Here - Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear   Time Management Secrets by Martin Manser Do you struggle to execute a job perfectly when your plate is too full? Well, Time Management Secrets is a winning aid for you. Explore the fundamentals of time management and give your career the much-needed wings. Read about the ways of strategizing and recognizing your priorities. The book includes priceless words of wisdom from experts in business circles. Learn the ropes of necessary work ethics, analyze the importance of communication and every other knick-knack, important to hit the easy-street.  Buy Now Here : Time Management: Collins Business Secrets   Girl Wash Your Face by Rachel Hollis Is your life topsy-turvy? Well, Rachel Hollis is here to tell you that it is okay to have a messy life. However, to make it a joyful space and make life a smooth-sailing, one must get over the bait of procrastinating and lying to oneself. It is a big hurdle that does a lot of damage. Girl Wash Your Face is a book that enlightens you about the 20 odd lies, people love telling themselves to procrastinate and hold back.  Buy Now Here : Girl, Wash Your Face   Year of Yes by Shonda Rimes Shonda Rimes is not an unknown name if you loved to binge-watch shows like ‘How To Get Away With Murder’ and ‘Grey’s Anatomy.’ The book is not a fancy tenement of tricks and tips for a better life. Instead, Rimes highlights the changes she witnessed after she said ‘YES’ for a year. It is a chronicle of episodes that only got better when she started nodding ‘YES’ for everything in life. Her...

Yes, I am turning 30 in a week. Don’t know how to perceive it. Unable to understand whether to feel happy or to feel sad... Don’t know whether it is encouraging or disheartening? Don’t know whether to celebrate or to cry? Just not able to sink in the feeling of entering the “club 30”. It’s because most teenagers want to be called as adults, not children. For that, they eagerly wait to leave the teenage and enter the world of the twenties. Surprisingly, the ones in their thirties also want to relive their twenties. So you see... the period of the twenties is one golden and an adventurous phase sought not only by the teenagers but also by the ones in their thirties. And the same is happening to me. Leaving my twenties is quite a heavy feeling. This new beginning marks the end of a tipsy-topsy yet worth-remembering decade.  Most of us fear the new and I am no different. I am apprehensive about it!!! But what is the reason behind it, I’m not able to figure out. Is that the beautiful memories of my twenties or the feel of worthlessness reaching the thirties? I have money, I have a beautiful family, I am working fine, both my physical and the mental appearance is fine, I have everything a person can ask for, but I am just not up for it. Don’t know what is wrong with me? What am I fearing, what do I want, why am I apprehensive...Why am I not able to take pride in turning 30? What is bothering me?  Locks without keys... questions without answers. Is it the professional lag I wish to destroy or is the entertainment I shall miss on turning 30? Well, I guess it is a mixture of both. But the ironical part is that in both the conditions, I don’t want to leave this phase. I have confessions to make both personally and professionally. Let’s find out the particular reasons behind my uncertainties... If you ask about my professional sphere... Maybe, the reason I am reluctant to reach the 30 is I could have done better with the phase of the twenties. And I still have a lot to achieve before I reach this stage. I feel I lag in achieving my goals. Sometimes, I even feel like a loser. When I look back, I don’t recall a beautiful past. Life has not been a fairy tale for me even after having everything a man needs to be happy. If I die a natural death which I suppose is 60, half of my life is over. But I still don’t know where my life is leading to. Read in a study somewhere that people get prone to a heart attack after they reach 30.  Now see, even studies indicate that my end is near. Hahaha… seriously these things have tickled my mind. You know why? Because if I die today, what will the people remember me for? Have I done anything worth remembering? Wow… some serious questions, huh?  If you ask about my personal sphere... I cannot look at the beautiful girls, don’t...