Emotional and Mental Health

How did I slip into depression? I was super-sensitive to every emotion, irrespective positive or negative. I didn’t know where to draw the line.  Positive triggers like success, appreciation, love, took me all over to the moon. And the negative forces of failure, criticism, hatred, left deep bruises on my mind. Success made me feel like an invincible winner, while the failures, the biggest loser. My ability to feel emotions strongly was a boon in my lovely childhood and teenage days. That's because the situations back then triggered positive emotions. I didn't know the meaning of negativity, leave apart feeling it.  But after then, it was a complete turnaround. It was not a tragedy or a loss. Nothing major happened, but it was just a gradual accumulation of negative emotions, which turned my life upside down. It was such a slow process I never realized till I drowned under the depth of countless thoughts. What led to my downfall?  It was that vulnerable age I was standing in the outset of an uncertain future. I had no answers to my question- What Next? It was the early twenties —dreams and ambitions like every other, with an upbeat to pursue the best career. But every beat was falling flat. I was unable to find the best walk ahead. This dilemma lasted for unusually long, and I felt insecure for the first time. My alter ego sunk to the all-time low. I stopped loving myself, and others. Suddenly, everyone looked hostile. It was the phase when instances provoking negative emotions completely outnumbered the ones fuelling positive emotions.  I was losing my self-worth as the negative thoughts attacked my vulnerable mind in unison. And the hole was dug too deep for my mind to breathe, and it submerged under the countless thoughts.  I was down and under and finally fell prey to depression.  I consulted a doctor (precisely psychiatrist) who prescribed the conventional antidepressants. Those pills comforted my mind initially, but never did I realize that it was the dawn of worse things to follow. Alcohol lured my mind to elusive happiness The antidepressants, after a while, had stopped soothing. The freshness of mind had turned into an impossible dream. Not finding shoulders to lean on, I got lured by Alcohol’s friendship offer. It accompanied my lonely nights, promised me a fairyland every night but pushed me to the bleak reality every subsequent morning. I diluted alcohol for some time, but within no time, it started diluting my potent self. My poor mind was as helpless as a lamb in the hands of a butcher. It continued for 2 long years... the same hungover morning giving way to alcoholic nights. From a soulful being to a feelingless creature, I was losing everything. And if it would have continued, I couldn’t write this soulful note. A twist in the tale Alcohol could have been my last chapter but destiny had something else in the store. Jaundice infected my liver those days, giving way to the need for mindful eating and drinking. And yes, neither antidepressants nor alcohol was on the menu. The upcoming days were the...

Do you lose your temper when someone cuts you in traffic? Or you feel guilty of exploding on anyone you can exercise your dominance, especially children, which you afterward regret? If something sounds relevant, you need to control your anger. Mismanaged anger can destroy personal, professional, and social relationships. It disturbs the peace inside.   Sometimes it’s hard to overturn consequences of fuming anger, especially broken trust and respect in a relationship. Why do you feel angry? Is anger bad? You feel angry when people don’t act and situations don’t happen, according to you. Stubborn thoughts conquer the mind under the rule of ego. All look perfect until the outside world happens according to your desire.   When people agree to you, you feel proud, unconsciously tuning to a self-boasting state. But then comes people’s perspective, their choice differs yours, and suddenly you dislike everyone and everything. You feel hurt, and your dwindled ego cries. It gets cranky, loaded with stress, and starts yelling on people, even on oneself (those brutal self-judgments). But that’s the downside of uncontrolled anger.  Though anger is a negative emotion, it’s not a useless emotion. It powers you with courage to raise a voice for a cause or second a perspective.  Anger is the driver of negative motivation, encouraging you to stand up against bullies and unethical behaviors.  So anger is a powerful emotion, not bad.  We just don’t know to manage anger. 16 magical anger management techniques  Know your triggers Anger is a little mud over the hard surface of other negative emotions. Tap on to your anger and embrace it, till you explore the underlying emotions triggering it. Jealousy or an Unfulfilled expectation... what’s your trigger? Express in person when you turn calmer Never hold a grudge. Talk to them and clear misunderstandings when temperature stabilizes. Holding it for long converts the loop of thoughts to negative emotions, which mires the raw and true feelings. Initiate your expression with ‘I’ statement having less or no ‘You’ Try improving the quality of your argument.  Say something like I feel bad as I’m already hurt or I can’t take this as I’m already feeling low. Then to say: How can you say this? It’s your fault. What’s wrong with you? Don’t stop yourself from being sensitive I am overly sensitive towards emotions.  What I found that’s one trait of my attitude. I need not change it, instead, stop judging myself for that. The less I self-judge, the less the anger, the more self-love floats, and the more I spread love. Stop focussing on personality when you are alone You lose on life experiences if you spend Me-time adjusting your personality.  You become more and more rigid. That rigidity fuels the anger most of the time. Let the people define your personality, stop self-labeling your identity, it’s not your job. Enhance quality of lifestyle What nutrition you intake, your discipline at work, and how much you rest, these mostly define your lifestyle. And a healthy lifestyle is a vital element of conscious living, so work on it. It’s a must for sanity where you are not fuming over little things. Affirmation of positive thoughts It’s a practice, 10-min everyday session.  Positive self talks soaked in love during this. Gratitude and Forgiveness the sole agendas here. Raise curiosity to...

According to Collins dictionary, Nature is all the animals, plants, and other things in the world that are not made by people, and all the events and processes that are not caused by people. (I'll be denoting Nature by They, Them, Their... Just cannot confine nature into a box of It.) Let’s meet Nature Nature is super-expressive! Since ages, they are trying hard to express: Pain during ruthless slaughtering, Misery in feeding pollutants, Suffering after a sudden human attack, Yes that’s what nature had to share. Because that’s what we... the most intelligent creatures on this planet... had been offering to them... in our own filthy ways. Cruel We ... who didn’t bother listening to nature shouts in pain inflicted by us. We could not sense those tears; We had no feelings for them in our consciousness. We murdered them for our luxuries; burnt them for money. We went unconscious of their existence, unaware that our existence is superficial without the creator — Nature! You might wonder: Why am I told this? Why am I forced to realize all of it? Well the whole purpose of saying this is: If that’s the ugly past you want to forget, guess what... you got this opportunity! It’s time you can break that equation, and start afresh chemistry with nature. Because nature just forgot ages of brutality by us during this pandemic. Nature revived without long-due revenge! Nature resurrected! Nature is back to the old school smiles! So time to get back to the present and embrace this undeserved opportunity. It’s important we connect with nature now... when they are all smiles! Never was a better time we could feel free from this guilt... the guilt of causing so much harm to them. It’s time we feel happy with them, for them! Just to remind you, nature was never helpless. If they would take long-due revenge, the entire human race could be sacrificed. That’s how much damage we did to them. But guess what... nothing as such happened... And nature we never met... sounds familiar! Call it luck, fate, destiny, anything, but make sure you accept this as a blessing! That human lockdown led to nature's independence! Indirectly adding more generations to the human race. All mediums of pollution are at rest. And the: fresh air, clear skies, whirling trees, gushing winds, chirping birds, they are all back. It’s a huge offering from nature who was hit brutally hard by us. So come on mate… We always complained about limited time. We were unconscious of their cries then. But about now...during this lockdown... Let us not miss this... to listen to nature expressing joy! Well if you are wondering... How do I interact with nature? Let me remind you there’s an unconscious breath transaction always on between you are the greens outside. Oxygen... Carbon dioxide... Oxygen... Carbon dioxide... lifetime transaction... till your last breath! And now let me ask you: The fact that life is lifeless without breath, and breath connects humans to nature, Is this not enough to create an involvement? I feel... Acknowledging this simple fact has enough reasons to develop a beautiful bond with the creator — Nature! If you could feel this mind shift, you could experience life over mental and emotional barriers. Your ego goes for a toss, as you...

The extended lockdown period... is it taking a toll on your mental health? Are you yearning to step out of lockdown to fulfill your desires? Is the pain of world outside transiting into your suffering? Do you struggle to utilize the Me time you never got before? Do you foresee uncertainties, leading to dilemmas, on the other side of pandemics? If any of these is happening with you during the Corona outbreak, your mind is turning into a theatre of psychological dramas. High time mate! You better stop engaging with your thoughts. Let’s understand what’s cooking A hell lot is happening around you, infact the whole world is suffering. Like too much to take! And amidst all these, the viral pictures of grief, remorse, sorrow, helplessness, are everywhere, in social media and news channels, making worse for the mind to sail smoothly with this life transition. The normal routine... regular thinking patterns... all disrupted! Nothing is motivating, nothing seems inspiring about the world right now. To add final nail to the coffin, this extended lockdown period! What all of it is resulting to? Overflowing thoughts... conspiring against each other, causing severe damage to your sanity. I was hit hard by lows during this quarantine. And as I always do, I consciously chose to explore the dark. I walked out in a better headspace! A few mindshifts pulled me out from the slumps of my mind. I am happy sharing these as my suggestions; hope you find them useful. 4 Mindshifts for a better headspace A mere acceptance of your pain Human race is mourning to bereavement, Eyes around reflect deep down fears, Destitution struck so hard the poor are starving to death, Economies gravely affected; savings vaporizing than never, Future looks ambiguous... the other side under dilemmas,  Like everything brought to a standstill! Difficult time this... as there is only pain to attract from the outside world. You never stood here before, and your mind is clueless about the way out. The result: A chaotic mind that produces anxiety. But my dear friend... you need to realize: Not only you, your family, your city, or your country... It’s the entire world that’s unsettled right now. So what you are going through is fine. It’s the current normal! Yes you need to accept this right now... Better said... you might wonder: How should I gracefully accept this change? Just acknowledge you are not battling alone. It's not only about you this time... we are in this together! This offers you strength to stand in solidarity, as we people are kind of sharing identical pain. It brings the acceptance you need! Trust me... Acceptance of pain is that reliever that never allows your pain turn into suffering. Consciously experience the biggest blessing — You are Alive! You are blessed to be alive, sitting at home, comfortable with your family, away from the virus, getting enough luxuries for a healthy living. You got to feel grateful for this! You are fortunate than millions suffering in this pandemic. Please don't let that feeling of gratitude die in your sub-consciousness. If I ask you:  Did you experience the fear of being asymptomatic to Covid-19 at any point? I think many of us would admit: Yes... I felt that... just for a little... but I did! If...

Both my sons, Mind and Soul were born in a small traditional family — Inner World. Soul is the elder one... 9 months elder to my younger son Mind. Three of us share a deep emotional connect ! Wondering who am I? I am Consciousness, Mother of Mind and Soul. Three of us live here, Inside The Inner World. We don’t have an apparent existence, but yes, we do have a lot of unheard experiences to share. Allow me to talk more about my sons... How did I look at Soul? Soul my son, was honest like a reflection of plain mirror. Be it anything, he kept nothing inside. He expressed whatever... and this was Soul’s biggest strength. He was the most emotional out of us, the reason Soul was super responsive to his deep-rooted essence — Feelings!! About Mind... He had a strange fascination for his thoughts. He was volatile, he was super-active — the traits that made him vulnerable to everything. Anyone could disguise him; Anything could provoke him. So I took extra care of him. In a nutshell: Soul IS a composite of feelings Mind a manifestation of thoughts The childhood bond between both brothers... They spent most of their time together, and so very well bonded. When Mind had a huge respect for his elder brother, Soul also loved his wee brother. As far as I could see, chemistry between my sons was as beautiful as the perfect picture! As Mind was impulsive, I didn’t let him encounter anything head on. I made Soul to meet the new experiences. And then, his responsibility was to direct his younger brother to respond similarly to same encounters. Everyone knew by now that Mind is his elder brother's reflection. Sooner, he stopped getting any personal attention. Soul answered everywhere, even to the questions asked to Mind. Mind never bothered... in fact, he perceived it as the perks of being younger. No face-off with the new, no efforts, no challenges, nothing... just mugging up the responses directed by Soul. It sounded a good deal to Mind! He had now added a layer of dense cushion around him — and that was the thick boundary of his comfort zone. By and by... Mind became habitually complacent, and Soul was now thoroughly leading his younger brother. All of this was happening under my supervision. I questioned none... neither the expressiveness of Soul nor the ignorance of Mind. We were living happily within the family borders. Being their mother, I was proud of the emotional connect I could build between my two sons. Gradually with: teenage approaching evolution of social world germination of materialistic needs It was time for my sons to step out of their world to meet the outside world. How did soul respond to the outside world? Soul had the knack of expressing his true feelings anywhere; he echoed even here — in the reel world. Most people got offended by his boldness; some even judged his expressiveness. The poor Soul didn’t know transparency levels are different everywhere. And that he’s not supposed to respond candidly everywhere like he does in his inner world. Even he didn’t...

Do you fear friends or colleagues will find out you are not as worthy as they think? Or you feel your success (irrespective big or small) was a fluke and people will soon find out you are a fraud? Don't worry it's the Impostor Syndrome where you feel like a fraudulent, a pretender, a hoaxer (which you are not). Approximately 70 percent of people will experience at least one episode of impostor syndrome in their lives. What's Impostor Syndrome? Why is it vicious? Often spelled as Imposter, feeling an Impostor is incompetence to deal with your imperfections and perform at the highest standards you set for yourself. It’s like riding high on egomania while enjoying success and then sliding down to fear of being called a cheater or a fraud. You feel like a loser irrespective how successful you are. It makes you incapable to focus on your current work, living in obscurity, not opening up to new opportunities. Rewards and Recognition do more harm than good where you feel you cannot justify your credentials in the upcoming project, and you fear people will know about your incompetence. The feeling of an Impostor kills creativity where you are constantly self-judging. You are too hard on yourself overthinking about people’s opinion of you.  It retracts you from the present moment, discharging the concentration, denting your flow, and jolts your personal and professional growth.  The good news is that you are not alone! Celebrity quotes on Impostor Syndrome: When I was younger, I just did it. I just acted. It was just there. So now when I receive recognition for my acting, I feel incredibly uncomfortable. I tend to turn in on myself. I feel like an impostor. It was just something I did. —Emma Watson    Sometimes I wake up in the morning before going off to a shoot, and I think, I can’t do this. I’m a fraud. —Kate Winslet   No matter what we've done, there comes a point where you think, 'How did I get here? When are they going to discover that I am, in fact, a fraud and take everything away from me? —Tom Hanks     I have written eleven books, but each time I think, 'uh oh, they’re going to find out now. I’ve run a game on everybody, and they’re going to find me out. —Maya Angelou  My Encounter with Impostor Syndrome  Insightful publications like Lifehack, Pick the Brain, Purpose fairy, Dumb Little Man published my articles. I received accolades for these, including some of my works published on my blog. Why am I bragging? The critic appreciation prod to deliver more, as I began expecting too much out of myself. I started fearing people’s eyes, thinking about them, all of it abstaining from workflow, diminishing my quality of work, questioning my talent and abilities. I could not write, unable to get rid of the perfectionist inside me self-judging constantly. My creativity fired many times, soon to nosedive into a polluted pool of uncertainties. I could not do love doing most — Expressing my thoughts and emotions. And that led to Impostor Syndrome where there were dilemmas and ambiguity, causing fear and my lower self cried: People will...

Did you ever feel depressed? If you have, you know there are many medicinal drugs available which we call the anti-depressants. My encounter with depression I was under the influence of depression medication for 5 years. One day I realized those anti-depressants have stopped soothing my mind. And I was in desperate need of permanent solutions. I asked myself: What is the best way to overcome depression naturally? How can I overcome depression without medication naturally?  I  even tried connecting to people whom I thought would comprehend my disorientation to thoughts and emotions. I was not too late to realize: Though it's easy to give theoretical pieces of advice on how to overcome depression, it looks impossible when it comes to its practical implementation. The person who never felt depressed at any point cannot guide you with the remedies to overcome depression. Therefore, it becomes imperative to express yourself to a person who can completely comprehend what you are going through. Bits of advice like try to be happy and stay away from negativity can do more harm than good to you. That's because these suggestions indicate the person cannot feel even 1 percent of your plight. Every depressed person is aware of these bits of advice the question remains 'How?' Here, I shall share a few practices which I followed in my gloomy past and came out of it strong. 14 ways to overcome depression naturally Meditate It is the best way to overcome depression naturally. To be honest, until my mind tasted the meditated feel, this technique sounded very boring to me. Always thought it was a waste of time but once I started practicing it, it was a magical feeling which I had never experienced before. Want to know the best part? I slowly revived my lost feel which made me realize the true meaning of being aware in the present moment.  Check out: 8 meditation techniques for complete beginners Follow compassion Helping others and bringing a smile to the faces of unfortunate people is the best you can bring a smile to your face. Don't believe me? Try it. If you are capable enough to feed the emotional or financial pain of people, never hold back. Trust me, Compassion is a gateway to the feeling of contentment, which is one of the best counter-attacks of depression. Listen to upbeat music It is one of the simplest ways to overcome depression naturally. Music is the food for the soul. Listening to cheerful music not only uplifts the mood but always keeps you away from thoughts. And once you start thinking less, the mind cuts the chords with depressive thoughts.  Eat healthy to feel healthy Your mental health is deeply connected to your physical health. Enrich your diet with food high in unsaturated fat like omega3. And did anyone tell you about the miracle ingredient turmeric? Never ignore its remarkable powers working as antidepressants. Please stay away from alcohol—the silent killer. It is an elusive stress buster. Not only it harms your physical health, but it also ruins your mental health as well. Accept yourself the way you are  Keep reminding yourself you are a beautiful soul. So please be good to yourself.  You need to realize quickly that everyone is wired differently and...

Everyone feels happy doing different things. But the basis of happiness remains the same for everyone.  My dear friend,  Happiness is awareness and appreciation of the present moment! Whatever we do, if we can pay kind attention to the present, with an attitude of non-judgment, it bestows with happiness. We feel blessed and appreciate everything, and are less prone to stress and negativity.  A beautiful observation by Gautama Buddha... “Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.”  Better said than done Everyone encounters many moments when we feel like running away from our present. Some situations are hostile, some moments are just not worth feeling them. If we feel them, we stress more, we agonize more.  I’m sure you can relate to any of the following hostile moments. How can we: feel happy in the present when we are hungry and don’t know the source of the next bread? dwell in the present when we are a failure today? enjoy the present seeing a handicapped beggar lying down on the side street? extract happiness from the surroundings when rapes and killings are happening around? feel the present when we lose a family member in a sudden demise? Seriously, why will we make our lives tougher living in the present when feeling it is already tough?  If this is what you are wondering, let me tell you that your curiosities have landed on the right harbor. Let’s unlock To begin, let me bombard a few questions on you. Were you happy when there was no reason to feel sad? Were you free flowing when life was fair? Was there no ego in your competition before? Were you cheerful when the situations were not adverse? Did you enjoy nature when everything around seemed beautiful? Were you high on life or high on success - if ever it was? Did you forgive your loved ones when they were alive? If you ask me ‘Why feel the present moment when it’s hostile’, I ask you… ‘Did you feel the present moment when it was unhostile?’ I’m sorry but my question is mightier than yours. And it’s taking you to a deep self-analysis, your feelings get hurt. You know why? It’s because you are guilty of playing the blame game on people and situations. And now finding it hard to take the onus on yourself. Now let’s talk about the solution for which we are here. Why feel the present moment when it is hostile? My dear, it’s easy to blame life, situations, people as per your convenience but what’s tough is to bother least about the outside. It’s easy to run from the present, but what’s hard is to stay there even in unfavorable situations. In reality, you cannot escape reality. No matter how hard you run, it soon catches up with your speed, this time with a harder intensity.  Turning away from challenging life by taking the help of medication and intoxication is not a solution either. It calms a few moments but these are not the solutions, just the momentary illusions. Please stop creating your parallel world by opting...

"Whatever goes around comes around." Yes, it is the bottom-line of Karma. Karma is our action or deed; no matter how small or big. Whatever we do, has an objective behind it. Karma also deals with that objective. If we do something good to others but it has an evil intention behind it, then according to karma, it is wrong. Likewise, if we make a mistake but the objective behind it is pure and pious, then karma treats you accordingly. Let us take an example. If we steal a coin and give it to a beggar who is in need, the motive behind it is compassion. Here, the act of helping overpowers the act of stealing. Therefore, whatever we do, it should have a noble intention behind it. It is what "Karma" teaches us.    

The past is gone; The future is unpredictable. What you have and what you can control right now is your present. It is imperative to feel it to enjoy it. As they say, time and tide wait for none; likewise, you should appreciate the present moment rather than making a hue and cry of your past or worrying about the future. On the contrary, what you do is either you ponder upon your past, or you are busy making plans for future. As a result, you neglect to feel the essence of the present moment.You need to realize that 'now' is the moment to cherish. These small moments in the present moment can only make your life happy. Awareness in the present moment makes every moment memorable in a way where you don't need memories to cherish later. When you enjoy the present, the future is bound to be good. One foot in the past and one foot in the future is just like keeping your feet in two boats and trying to make a balance to stay safe. This way, you will not only hurt yourself but also will lose the precious moments of now. STOP HERE. Take deep breaths. Enjoy the NOW. Don't run away from it. Don't allow your thinking to take control over your feelings. Things will happen. You are neither early nor late. Respect the 'TIME ZONE.' Just flow with each passing moment.  Relax and enjoy the present moment. Learn the art of Meditation to stimulate your feelings, which will keep you away from overthinking. Life is beautiful. Start cherishing every moment now.